OT: If You’ve Had Bad Pizza We’d Like To Meetz’Ya!

[dean]

Um, I really don't know what to make of this, so I thought I'd share:

If You’ve Had Bad Pizza We’d Like To Meetz’Ya!

A group of lawyers defending your pizza rights!

Your Pizza Rights:
. You have the right to edge-to-edge toppings.

. Toppings shall be fresh and never canned.

. Toppings will be found on top of the cheese, for perfect cooking.

. Cheese shall be aged provolone, and shall never be spelled "cheez."

. You are entitled to 100 pieces of pepperoni on every large pepperoni pizza.

. You have the right to expect consistently great taste with every pie.
 

Now this is a creative marketing campaign, methinks...

Damn, now I'm hungry...

[Ash]

100 pieces of pepperoni.
Heartburn city!

I'll bring the Pepto-Bismol.

[Just Plain Horse]

Sorry, Domino's is the worst I've ever had... it tasted like the box it came in... I would think it's hard to make a bad pizza.

[ToyMan]

i actually sort of prefer some of my toppings underneath the cheese. am i alone on this?

[Ash]

Just Plain Horse Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sorry, Domino's is the worst I've ever had... it
> tasted like the box it came in... I would think
> it's hard to make a bad pizza.


I agree.
Domino's used to be my favorite.
Now I think they're absolute crap.

And I gotta ask that same question...how do you mess up pizza?
They must just use low quality ingredients.

[Ed, Ego and Superego]

I like some under the cheese as well.  
-Ed

[Scott]

Pizza is probably the greatest invention in the history of the world. : ) Mama Mia...........I like my toppings mix within the cheese, but pepperoni is fine on the top.

[daveblackeye15]

Thank god! Now I feel much safer!

And I kinda like the toppings underneath the cheese but I'm still all for above the cheese also.

[The Conqueroo]

Pleesed To Meat You!!

[Scottie]

Pleeased to meats ya too

[AndyC]

Yeah, toppings entirely on top of the cheese isn't good. I like half my cheese on the bottom, then the toppings, then the rest of the cheese. I find the pizza holds together better that way. I place in my hometown used to put the toppings on top, and half of them fell off in the box After enough complaints they changed. Pepperoni is good on top, because it won't roll, and does well with a bit of direct dry heat. But I have no idea what putting the toppings on top has to do with proper cooking. The cheese will conduct the heat to the veggies, then keep them warm (unlike veggies sitting on top). The main thing to ensure proper cooking is to cook it long enough that the cheese gets bubbling and the toppings cook. This is where everybody screws up, because they rush it.

Also not sure how you'd hold a slice with toppings right to the edge, or how you keep things from running off. Perhaps setting a limit on the width of the crust edge would be better, and guaranteeing that toppings go all the way to it (which they often don't).

And they forgot the most important right: No matter how many toppings you order, you are entitled to the same amount of each. I can't help noticing that the toppings seem no thicker on my pizza when I order six as when I order three. When I order lots of tippings, I want lots of toppings, not an occasional bit of each.

The aged provolone does sound good though, although I wouldn't rule out other cheeses.