For those interested, free room in exchange of sex (sort of)

[Neville]

And no, I have absolutely nothing to do with that, I'm looking for somebody to sleep with me AND pay the rent.

http://www.gumtree.com/london/84/4150784.html

[dean]

Um, this is quite disturbing.  But hey, apparently I get extra points for just being me!  So that's a bonus I guess...

Though I do have a bit of Middle East in me, though she wouldn't know that by looking at me [it's just 1/4]

Hehe, an 'ugly anti-social' is a no go for her.  How funny!  Though I must wonder why she needs a close-up picture of your armpits [oh wait, I just read a little lower... ewww...]

How the hell did you come across this one Neville?

[Neville]

Someone posted it in another board.

[Ash]

That woman wrote:

"You will need to lie shirtless in just your boxer shorts on my bed and hand cuffed with your arms above your head. There will be no intercourse, I will simply just simply play with you, caress you, run my fingers along your body, rest my head on your chest, talk to you, etc."

Yeah right!
Once handcuffed, she'll start speaking in a demonic voice and produce an enormous car battery.
Then she'll start touching jumper cables together...sparking like crazy while she attempts to lick the sparks with her tongue.

Then she'll say in that demonic voice, "We're gonna have some fun motherfu*ker!"

Then you scream.

[Neville]

LOL... You make it sound *almost* worthwhile, Ash.

[odinn7]

She must be one ugly pig.

[Ed, Ego and Superego]

Heck with housing prices what they are in London, she rprobably wouldhave them lining up.   I mean sheesh, its not lik eyou have to clean the bathroom or anything.

[odinn7]

...yeah...she just wants sex from you without actually having sex...oh yeah, I'd be all over that...I don't think so.

[Shadowphile]

The adhas been removed.  Only the ad title remains....  

[loyal1]

I don't think she is one ugly pig...I think she is a wealthy career woman who knows what she wants and feels that money can buy anything she wants...even people.  How does she know?  Because it's people that allow themselves to be bought.  Even if good looking I would imagine it is hard to meet a man that you can control for your strange sexual fetishes with no intercourse.  To each his own I suppose. :/

[The Conqueroo]

"Living On Reds;Vitamin C and Cocaine.All A Friend Can Say Is Ain't It A Shame."-"Truckin'":The Grateful Dead.Sounds Like An Episode of CSI Waiting To Happen!!

[odinn7]

^ ^ ^ WTF is wrong with you?

[ulthar]

That, my Norse friend, is the question of the week.  And very well put, I might add.

[Flangepart]

(Sigh) Where is Ed Wood when you REALY need him? Imagin the film he could make outta this!