Really dumb pre made foods ...

[Newt]

mac and cheese ...you can buy 3 16oz. boxes of it for a $1 which will make about a bucket of it.

True, but there was one summer when I was in school that I was so broke between paychecks (working painting houses we got paid by the job, not by the week, and we were on a big one) that I could not *afford* to make even this stuff.  Why? Because to make it I had to have butter and milk.  (No I was not hungry enough to eat it made with water alone.  Close, but not quite.)  When my rent and bus pass were paid for I was down to half a loaf of bread and a small bag of carrots.  No cheese etc - they were too costly.  So I could see buying the canned stuff...once.  Not as a regular thing, and not now surely.

[Sister Grace]

you wanna know what really scares me? fish sticks!! there is no way i'd feed them to my daughter; they seem to consist of a 'supposedly' crunchy coating with the insides being a mushy goo that tastes like melted styrofoam plates.

Pre-made pot roasts freak me out too. How hard is it to throw a piece of meat in the crock pot and leave it there till its ready to add vegetables to it?

Pre-cooked bacon? gross

I think the worst pre-made meal i ever had was one of those frozen ham, egg, and cheese croissants.

When i was at the grocery store the other day, i actually seen a can of the mac n cheese. I thought, gee it don't get much worse than that. And i thought that for awhile until two aisles over i passed a can of 'homemade' sausage gravy....

[AndyC]

I use pre-cooked bacon once in a while, mainly to avoid the mess of cooking bacon. Basically, we put the bits on nachos or the slices on club sandwiches. If we actually want to eat, say, bacon and eggs, we cook our own bacon.

I'm amazed at the frozen slow-cooker meals that are just the right size and shape to plunk into your crock pot before you go to work. What's difficult about throwing in a chunk of meat, a few vegetables, some water, seasoning and a boullion cube? It's already about the simplest homemade dinner you can have.

The one that always grosses me out when I go to the store is the heat-and-eat mashed potatoes. I don't mind the flakes so much, since they have their uses, but I'm talking about a plastic bag full of mashed potatoes. That in itself is not what I find particularly gross, just unappetizing and silly. What gets me is that they come in two varieties - with or without lumps. Geez Louise.

I think those are the two kinds of instant foods that bug me the most. The ones that make 'convenience food' out of something that was already convenient, and the ones that tackle foods that just have to be made fresh. Mashed potatoes have to be fresh and hot, or they're just no good. They set up, and that's that. They don't reheat well, and they actually take a bit of a knack to make right in the first place. They can come out too wet, too dry, not fluffy enough, soupy, lumpy or just bland. If you really like mashed potatoes (and you can tell I do), I can't see the bagged stuff passing muster.

[Newt]

...heat-and-eat mashed potatoes...come in two varieties - with or without lumps. Geez Louise.

ROFLMBO!  Now, if THAT is not a tacit admission that what is in that bag does not really approach 'homemade', what is?
People pay for this?  Lumpy processed mashed?  Real potatoes are so cheap too.

[Patient7]

Pre-cooked bacon? gross

I think the worst pre-made meal i ever had was one of those frozen ham, egg, and cheese croissants.

Actually, I've had pre-cooked bacon at my grandmother's once and I must say it was quite good.  As for those frozen mcgriddles, yummy.  Kinda tired after a while, but yummy.

[AndyC]

ROFLMBO!  Now, if THAT is not a tacit admission that what is in that bag does not really approach 'homemade', what is?
People pay for this?  Lumpy processed mashed?  Real potatoes are so cheap too.

The lumpy variety is sold as "homestyle."  Not my home, that's for sure.

Here's some advice from the Yoder's mashed potato FAQ:

We recommend consuming our Mashed Potatoes within 7 days of opening the bag or by the date stamped on the bag; whichever comes first. We do not recommend freezing our Mashed Potatoes, however if they should become frozen, they are safe to consume but may take some extra stirring when heated. Allow the Mashed Potatoes to thaw in the refrigerator and then follow the heating instructions on the back of the container. Some people like to use a mixer to whip the potatoes back to their original consistency.

Use within seven days of opening the bag. Good lord. Almost as amusing is the lengths to which people will go to make their premade mashed potatoes palatable. If you're going to heat it in a pot, stir it and whip it with a mixer, you're already about halfway to making fresh potatoes.

In some ways, that last part reminds me of my dad, who can't actually cook, but if forced to will add some little bit of panache to a frozen delicacy and then brag about it. I used to do that when I was little, so it's kind of cute. For example, my dad cannot bake a frozen pie without telling you all about how he spreads a bit of butter on top before putting it in the oven. Well move over Wolfgang Puck! The pie must taste like crap without that half-teaspoon of butter. And that is the sad truth. People who rely on this stuff actually think they're cooking.

[ghouck]

When i was at the grocery store the other day, i actually seen a can of the mac n cheese. I thought, gee it don't get much worse than that. And i thought that for awhile until two aisles over i passed a can of 'homemade' sausage gravy....

I use canned sausage gravy from time to time, mainly because I don't have the patience to make real gravy. It's really not that bad, , of course it's GRAVY, so it's not very good for you. Also, believe it or not, canned gravy seems to have less salt than the gravy I'VE made, , A can't eat anything with lots of salt.

As for fish sticks,, you have no idea. . Many of those are made right on the ships that catch them, and I've seen the inside of more than a few of those ships. It seems like the Russian ships are the worst, I've gone onto the factory deck of them and seen 1/2 of the paint on the ceiling and walls missing so it was rusting, like layers of laminated rust, and about 1/2 of the paint that was missing from the walls was in huge flakes all over everything, including the processing machinery.

Believe it or not though, some of the fish sticks you buy aren't nearly as bad as they look, it's just kinda a weird way of making food, but made on some really clean ships or land-based factories. They lay many layers of fillets of fish out in a big pan and freeze it solid. Then they cut that solid chunk into fish-stick sized chunks and bread, cook them while frozen. Sounds weird, but you end up with honest fish fillet meat inside. MUCH better than the was hot-dogs and bologna is made. Now, , that's for GOOD fish-sticks, , for crappy ones, , who knows. .

I think the worst pre-made meal i ever had was one of those frozen ham, egg, and cheese croissants.

I make them at home all the time. I BUY the croissants and cook up the eggs and ham or salami, put some cheese and salsa on it. I bring one to work every once in a while and I usually end up with all 30 of the inmates that work for me watching me eat through my office window, then later I get the rundown on how bad their breakfast sucked, which is OK with me, , nothing would p**s me off worse than knowing they were getting fed better than servicemen do (I have to say, prison food SUCKS, I wouldn't eat it if it wasn't free).

While we're talking about FOOD, I just don't understand the thing with KETCHUP these days. Salsa is SOO much better, I haven't bought ketchup in YEARS. Eggs, burgers, mac-n-cheese WHATEVER you put ketchup on you can put salsa on and it tastes better. It seems the weird things people put ketchup on like scrambled eggs or mac-n-cheese benefit the most. . Ketchup is boring. .

[AndyC]

The rules are not quite as cut and dried when it comes to frozen food. As Ghouck said, a lot of fish sticks are processed right on the boat, and its the cleanliness of the process that matters. But frozen fish is often better than fresh, unless you live close to where it's caught. The bacteria that make fish smell 'fishy' do just fine at refrigerator temperatures. To inhibit the bacteria, you have to freeze them.

Frozen vegetables are likewise often better than what is in the produce department. Unless you're going to the farmers market and buying local food in season, chances are the fresh vegetables you're buying have been trucked or even carried by ship from who knows where. The've sat on loading docks, passed through warehouses, driven down miles of highway over days or weeks. They aren't particularly fresh when they arrive, and a lot of their vitamins are gone. Fruits like tomatoes were likely picked before they were ripe. Meanwhile, frozen vegetables get processed and flash frozen relatively close to the farm.

Canned veggies are, by far, the worst. Dull, mushy, tasteless, no vitamins. That's pretty much what I got fed as a kid, at times of year when our own garden wasn't producing. Nothing but fresh or frozen veg for me these days. Even been tempted to plant a vegetable garden of my own next year, as an educational thing for my daughter. That and the fresh produce sold around here is a crap shoot at best.

[Sister Grace]

While we're talking about FOOD, I just don't understand the thing with KETCHUP these days. Salsa is SOO much better, I haven't bought ketchup in YEARS. Eggs, burgers, mac-n-cheese WHATEVER you put ketchup on you can put salsa on and it tastes better. It seems the weird things people put ketchup on like scrambled eggs or mac-n-cheese benefit the most. . Ketchup is boring. .

Ketchup is gross and i don't understand America's facination with it. Like you, I can eat salsa on anything. Nothing tops a baked potato better than salsa. I also love hot sauce and think its the perfect condiment. Most people look at me wierd when i order fries i always get them sprinkled with feta and with a side of mayo. (you don't get hips like these jogging every morning   )

[ghouck]

I see it often, at a party or a barbecue and someone takes a steak, or even a chunk of Halibut (which costs more that King Crab these days), or even Prime Rib, and pours ketchup all over it. They could have done the same with a chunk of black rockfish, which people GIVE away on the docks in quantity, and it would have tasted no different than halibut, since it's just going to taste like ketchup.
There was a steakhouse in Texas that used to bring the entire restaurant staff out and they surrounded you while singing some fairly insulting song whenever someone used ketchup on a steak. Kinda like the birthday treatment some restaurants give you, except insulting. I heard they used to take your steak away and replace it with a burnt hamburger patty, but I'd never seen THAT. 

[Raffine]

I've always thought these were the dumbest/laziest pre-made food item I've ever seen:



I'm thinking it takes longer to defrost one of these beauties than it does to make an Honest-To-Goodness peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Even if you cut off the crusts.


I'll bet soon we'll see NEW! Uncrustables with Crusts!



These are a head scratcher/stomach-churner:


If they only came with a maple-flavored high fructose corn syrup in little plastic packets to squeeze over them.

[CheezeFlixz]

http://www.theimpulsivebuy.com/images/whitecastlecheeseburger.jpg

no hot link

First off these are nasty fresh actually in a White Castle, I have no idea why any one would want to buy one frozen and heat it up at home. I never got the fascination with White Castle Burgers.

[Patient7]

First off these are nasty fresh actually in a White Castle, I have no idea why any one would want to buy one frozen and heat it up at home. I never got the fascination with White Castle Burgers.

Oh come on, White Castle is delicious!  I don't know about the frozen kind but still.

[CheezeFlixz]

Oh come on, White Castle is delicious!  I don't know about the frozen kind but still.

White Castle's, much like Krystal's is only good at 3AM after you've been drinking all night. (Which you're not old enough to yet, legally.)

[Patient7]

Oh come on, White Castle is delicious!  I don't know about the frozen kind but still.

White Castle's, much like Krystal's is only good at 3AM after you've been drinking all night. (Which you're not old enough to yet, legally.)

Despite the fact that I disagree with you, that's kinda funny.