So...what are you wearing?

[Saucerman]

A friend is throwing an "Anti-Valentine's" party this coming Saturday.  Judging by the guest list, it's going to be me and my friend (and fellow B-movie reviewer) Dan, and about fifteen single women drinking mixed drinks with sexually-suggestive names.

The theme of this party is "porno movie," and we're supposed to come dressed as our favorite archetypal character from porn (i.e., school teacher, secretary, construction worker, etc.).  I am going as "pool boy" and laying out my costume.

Hawaiian shirt, top three buttons unbuttoned.
Shorts
Sunglasses
A bottle of tanning lotion

Dan is going as "camera man":
T-shirt
Jeans
Sunglasses
Sleazy hat
Fake Mustache
Camera

[Wortcov]

mostly I wear a pair of jeans, a T-shirt and a short sleeved shirt over that. I wish I was able to walk around in a unbuttoned shirt, but I don't want to show my wobbly stomach to everyone scare the living daylight out of the ladies whit my huge manly lovehandels covered in thick, red manly hair 

[Saucerman]

mostly I wear a pair of jeans, a T-shirt and a short sleeved shirt over that. I wish I was able to walk around in a unbuttoned shirt, but I don't want to show my wobbly stomach to everyone scare the living daylight out of the ladies whit my huge manly lovehandels covered in thick, red manly hair 

But-but-but...that's your privilege as A DUDE! You've got the god-given right to expose your nipples and hairy belly!