Confessional---Anything To Get Off Your Chest?

[ER]

Years ago when my cousin came home from rehab and was trying to turn her life around, her doctor gave her an assignment and told her to get a plant and take care of it, and if the plant was still alive six months after she got it, she could get a pet to take care of. Well, she tried but after a while her plant started dying and I felt bad for her, so I bought a plant that looked like hers and substituted it without telling her. She was thrilled her project worked and so was ready for a pet. She bought a little blue parakeet and named him Louie, then got back on cocaine and into the party life, and the bird literally starved to death in his cage. I still feel a little responsible for my role in leading up to that.

[Rev. Powell]

You are forgiven.  Go forth and mind thy own business.  Drink 4 Bloody Marys.   

[indianasmith]

I think I may be addicted to this forum . . . . I can't stop posting . .  . and my nostrils are flaring again!!!!!

[Vik]

I'm pretty sure I'm addicted to this forum too

[ER]

Confession: After spending the last decade on my twenty-something elitist soap box harping about all the reasons I hated Walmart and how it was so evil and bad, I bought a coffee maker there because the one I wanted was eight bucks cheaper than it would've been at Target. I mean eight bucks? I feel like such a traitor now.... Like I have joined the dark side. (And they didn't even give me cake!)

[The Burgomaster]

At a house party about 20 years ago I peed in my friend's clothes dryer.

[jimmybob]

Years ago, I had a school assignment to write a speech on a topic. So I went on Google, and copied a witty article about it, because I forgot about the assignment and I was desperate not to fail. I was voted for best speech in the class, and the English teacher thought I was one of the best students.

Sometimes I think of this and I can't sleep.

-Jimmybob

[Newt]

Confession: After spending the last decade on my twenty-something elitist soap box harping about all the reasons I hated Walmart and how it was so evil and bad, I bought a coffee maker there because the one I wanted was eight bucks cheaper than it would've been at Target. I mean eight bucks? I feel like such a traitor now.... Like I have joined the dark side. (And they didn't even give me cake!)

Sweetie, they lied about the cake. 

[Rev. Powell]

Once, I promised someone cake if they would betray their principles, and never paid up.

[Newt]

Once, I promised someone cake if they would betray their principles, and never paid up.

AHA! So that was YOU!

[Saucerman]

I love seeing my ex-girlfriend's facebook status updates about how she needs a man in her life.  It just thrills me to see her regret over throwing me away. 

[Jordan]

Ok, here's a doozy of a confession.... I probably shouldn't bring this up, but hey, I'm a glutton for punishment...

Last year I broke up with my girlfriend, who I have been dating since high school (over nine years!). While this act isn't exactly anything to really confess over, the reason I broke up with her was. I fell for (and was seduced by) a gal at the workplace who was married. Her hubby was away in Japan, and I guess I was the next best thing. To quote George Thorogood "I done let the deal go down" and eventually I found myself very, very alone and wishing I could go back and stop myself from being a farkin' idiot.

I am happy to announce that I have since gotten back together with my high school sweetheart and all is well, but my mistake cannot be forgotten and it still haunts me to this day (since it gets brought up during almost every argument! DOH!)!

On a lighter note, back when I was in middle school, I used to steal packs of gum from a local convenience store before getting on the school bus to fit in with some of the "cool kids." I would grab a few packs to buy (in order to not arouse suspicion) and then stick another three or four up the sleeve of my jacket. This was luckily a short phase I went through, so I stopped long before I could ever be caught.

Don't judge me too harshly based on these tales of woe; I'm a nice guy and typically have high moral standards. I just sort of stray from the right path from time to time and do stupid sh*t.

[Jordan]

By the by Saucerman.... DON'T EVER GIVE HER A SECOND CHANCE! Instead, go get yourself a nice little Fright Rags-wearing goth chick who loves horror and cult films! 

[Paquita]

Years ago when my cousin came home from rehab and was trying to turn her life around, her doctor gave her an assignment and told her to get a plant and take care of it, and if the plant was still alive six months after she got it, she could get a pet to take care of. Well, she tried but after a while her plant started dying and I felt bad for her, so I bought a plant that looked like hers and substituted it without telling her. She was thrilled her project worked and so was ready for a pet. She bought a little blue parakeet and named him Louie, then got back on cocaine and into the party life, and the bird literally starved to death in his cage. I still feel a little responsible for my role in leading up to that.

Don't feel too bad, I can't keep a plant alive for six months because my pets keep eating them.

I don't think I have anything to confess that I haven't already confessed, OR that doesn't involve other people and I am bound to secrecy.

[Allhallowsday]

At a house party about 20 years ago I peed in my friend's clothes dryer.

 I can't even give you consideration for admitting it, unless you also admit your state of drunkenness (I mean, let's get real).  

What could I confess...?  

I've peed in many an alley... maybe even one or two doorways...