Bathroom Misses/Near Misses

Mr. DS · October 03, 2010, 07:45:15 PM

Quote from: Bull on October 03, 2010, 04:04:10 PM
umm, this isn't 1 0r 2, but it deals with throw up. It was either the 5th or 6th of August, I ate too much stuff, after we (me and my mum) went the the LEGO store in Houston (we didn't make it), we were two blocks away from our Cousin's house, but I threw up before that. Since that day, I also haven't eaten 6 lunches a day and is rarely hungry.

I say why not open this #3, aka puking.

I remember one time a buddy and I were at the local state fair taking on ride after ride. Second to the last I started to feel a bit sickly. I decided to take a break while my friend went on a ride by himself. However, this ride NEEDED two people. It was the most topsy turvey ride in the whole damn fair. I got off after what seemed like an hour and proceeded to blow chunks on the way to a trash can. I can still recall the teenage girls on the bench near it saying, "EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW".

Allhallowsday · October 03, 2010, 09:49:55 PM

Quote from: The DarkSider on October 03, 2010, 07:45:15 PM
Quote from: Bull on October 03, 2010, 04:04:10 PM
umm, this isn't 1 0r 2, but it deals with throw up. It was either the 5th or 6th of August, I ate too much stuff, after we (me and my mum) went the the LEGO store in Houston (we didn't make it), we were two blocks away from our Cousin's house, but I threw up before that. Since that day, I also haven't eaten 6 lunches a day and is rarely hungry.
I say why not open this #3, aka puking.

I remember one time a buddy and I were at the local state fair taking on ride after ride. Second to the last I started to feel a bit sickly. I decided to take a break while my friend went on a ride by himself. However, this ride NEEDED two people. It was the most topsy turvey ride in the whole damn fair. I got off after what seemed like an hour and proceeded to blow chunks on the way to a trash can. I can still recall the teenage girls on the bench near it saying, "EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW".

Yeeuucchchchchchhh!!!
Poor thing; if it weren't you, it'd be me...

...but I never had no such moment...

Ed, Ego and Superego · October 04, 2010, 04:05:53 PM

THis is a different tack...
1) I was bending over the toilet and my new (very same day) smartphone fell out of my shirt pocket, bounced off the rim and landed on the floor,
2) On a train in England, they had this fancy electronic door in the toilet. I needed to go walked through the people to the front of the train, and hit the button. The door whooshed open, all la star trek, to show this poor girl sitting there. She had forgotten to lock the door.

-Ed

Trevor · October 05, 2010, 10:28:54 AM

There's a poster on the IMDB message boards whose screen name is IPMOARB. When asked what these letters stood for, he / she said I Poop Myself On A Regular Basis.

Family member maybe? Dunno.

The Burgomaster · October 05, 2010, 02:23:30 PM

A few winters ago I was snowblowing the driveway. I was wearing gray sweat pants. At one point, I ripped off a fart and it felt moist, but I just figured I was getting damp from the snow. After awhile my wife came out of the house and said, "Did you s**t your pants?" Sure enough, there was a dark, wet patch on the back of my sweat pants. I'm sure a few kids on their way to school and people driving by saw me.

Umaril The Unfeathered · October 05, 2010, 03:18:48 PM

Quote from: The Burgomaster on October 05, 2010, 02:23:30 PM
A few winters ago I was snowblowing the driveway. I was wearing gray sweat pants. At one point, I ripped off a fart and it felt moist, but I just figured I was getting damp from the snow. After awhile my wife came out of the house and said, "Did you s**t your pants?" Sure enough, there was a dark, wet patch on the back of my sweat pants. I'm sure a few kids on their way to school and people driving by saw me.

Oh man... oh well, my turn.

My wife and I ate at Friendly's, and whatever mayonnaise or dressing they used on the burger went thru me like a white tornado. As I was walking in the mall with my wife afterward, the urge became more and more. I told her what was happening.

I ran to the bathroom, and just as I got there, I sneezed (and farted at the same time) and I sh*t myself. It took about a roll of tissue to clean the mess up. My pants were unmarked, but the undies were ruined, and I threw them away in the bathroom garbage can.

I walked thru the mall w\o any undies and needless to say it was a bit irritating in zippered blue jeans.

Mr. DS · October 05, 2010, 07:50:00 PM

QuoteI ran to the bathroom, and just as I got there, I sneezed (and farted at the same time) and I sh*t myself. It took about a roll of tissue to clean the mess up. My pants were unmarked, but the undies were ruined, and I threw them away in the bathroom garbage can.

My mother was noctorious for her IBM. She'd insist on taking a dump before going anywhere in the car. Plus she had this vendetta against public restrooms. Not sure why. Anyhow, one day at Toys R Us she insisted we leave the store. On the way home she was crying saying "its coming out". Now you all know why I'm so messed up.

Umaril The Unfeathered · October 05, 2010, 08:19:23 PM

Quote from: The DarkSider on October 05, 2010, 07:50:00 PM
QuoteI ran to the bathroom, and just as I got there, I sneezed (and farted at the same time) and I sh*t myself. It took about a roll of tissue to clean the mess up. My pants were unmarked, but the undies were ruined, and I threw them away in the bathroom garbage can.

My mother was noctorious for her IBM. She'd insist on taking a dump before going anywhere in the car. Plus she had this vendetta against public restrooms. Not sure why. Anyhow, one day at Toys R Us she insisted we leave the store. On the way home she was crying saying "its coming out". Now you all know why I'm so messed up.

IBM- is that the Irritable Bowel syndrome, or something to that name? I think that has something to do with too much stomach acid?