My parents are divorcing. (Was: "Gee, Thanks Mom...")

[bloodkrishna]

 Like I said, she's never been one to express that emotion in front of others (at least, not us kids.)  That or affection, so we all kind of grew being these emotionally distant people.  So, now when a situation comes up that would call for me to do stuff like hug her, tell her encouraging things, remind her I love her and stuff, it's like... it's hard to do.  Cause it's not stuff we usual say, so there's there distance between us and, frankly, I don't know how to cross it.  

but isn't this is the right moment to break this little ice between you and your mum?
come on, I think in this situation, she need your care and love

[BTM]

So, anyway.. for an update.  Been checking in with my mom.  She's not doing so great I guess.  Understandably, it's difficult for her to talk about the situation without breaking down a bit.  She's a bit concerned about the future, as she's 60, got a bad knee, and foot, and hasn't worked in years, so dunno how she'll be able to get by.  She's especially about what will happen few years down the road, and what a burden she'll be on my sister and their family, when/if her condition worsens.  

I don't know, the whole situation is just crazy.  I don't really know what to make of it.  I mean, I have to admit, I did see this as a possibility a few years back when I was still living with them.  For various reasons I'm not going to get into, they started doing some things I couldn't help but think, "This won't end well..." but I just did my best to put it out of my mind as it wasn't really my business.

Anyway, she had a meeting with a lawyer.  Dunno about the details, but the lawyer gave her a free half hour consultation, and then said she's need $2,000 for a retainer before she could start doing anything.    

I just can't get over how my stepdad just up and does this after TWENTY-TWO years of marriage.  I mean, whatever flaws mom may have, you think he'd have gotten used to them by now, or at least be willing to try counseling or something before just up and leaving.  I'm getting the feeling the other woman's got him thinking of the whole "grass is greener" type mentality.  

(sighs)

[Allhallowsday]

Don't let this unhappy circumstance possess your own life.  Be supportive of your mother, break the mold and express affection and kindness to her, surprise her maybe, you decide what's the most you can do, but let her decide what she needs to do.  I am relating in a personal way... I've been 'round that mulberry bush, very different yet ironically similar, I think I understand what you're experiencing.  Men can do some not nice things, blatant philandering... slinking around... lying.  So, it's hurtful.  Don't get sucked in.