Riffs that YOU'VE made.

[BTM]

Come on, I know we're all big fans of MST3K, and I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one that likes to say crazy stuff during movies (not in the theater mind you, at home) to try and crack up whoever is watching it with (or sometimes just to amuse myself.)

So, what are some crazy things MST3K style things you've said you thought were funny?

To start...

Air Force One

(Harrison Ford is fighting with a terrorist and he ends the encounter by smacking the guy upside the head with a chair.)

Me: Hail to the chief, baby!

[Jack]

I was watching Monster Dog the other night.  Some wild dogs run into a house and chew up one guy pretty well.  Next, the big werewolf appears at the door.  Camera shows the chewed up guy laying on the floor.  My little comment:  "I'm already half eaten, maybe you'd like to try one of these other people instead?"

...maybe ya had to be there...

[InformationGeek]

My cousin and me watched Empire of the Ants just to do this.  I remember when the scene when the guy burned down the sugar plant and I said: Knowing his future losses, the director decides to burn down the movie set and hope to collect the insurance money on it.

[Jim H]

Randomly yelling out a chunk of the chorus from the Howling 2 during werewolf attack scenes.  The chorus goes "OW OW OW OW!".

[Leah]

during a PSA on Porno Mag., I yelled out "Is THIS a G-Rated PSA?!"

[Umaril The Unfeathered]

Watching the original Carnival Of Souls, in the part where the main character is in the car and up to her neck in water after the crash. 

I said to my cousin: "Proof that any woman that dates Ted Kennedy winds up way in over her head.." 

[Rev. Powell]

Dialogue from BREEDERS:

[A woman is lying in a hospital bed and a detective is trying to get information from her about the aliens that attacked her]

Woman: I can't remember...
Me (female voice): My next line!
Woman (crying): I can't remember!
Me: My next line!

[BTM]

I said to my cousin: "Proof that any woman that dates Ted Kennedy winds up way in over her head.." 

HAHA!  That's horrible (but funny!)

[BTM]

This isn't really a riff, but it's more like a funny/horrible thought.  

My friend and I are watching The Hurt Locker and there's this scene where two guys are dragging off one of the main characters (who's unconscious) when the other two guys show up, shot the guys and rescue their buddy, carrying him back to base.

I said to my friend, "Hey, John, what if the guy woke up while they were walking and they said something like, 'Don't worry man, you're okay!'

And he goes, "Oh... wait, where are my friends?"

"What?  Your friends?"

"Yeah, Sayid and Amal, they were talking me to a hospital when I passed out suddenly.  Are they okay?"

(long, uncomfortable pause)

"Uh, yeah, they're fine!  They uh, went back to their camp!  Yeah, that's it..."

[retrorussell]

Santa Claus Conquers The Martians:
Santa greets a robot that visits his North Pole abode.  He looks the robot over from the front, then from the behind.
Me: Been working out, huh?

Blue Eyes Of The Broken Doll:
The credits play during the opening scene.  The actress' name "Eva Leon" appears as thunder booms in the distance.
Me: Starring Eva Leon as the goddess of thunder!

Pretty much any Lucio Fulci flick where a woman is being stabbed and screams but doesn't resist..
Me: I can't seem to get away!  I'm somehow drawn to being stabbed!

[Leah]

during The Screaming Skull, when the characters drive in the 300SL, "Well there goes all of the production money, all into one car."
when they arrive:" Umm, your not going to close your doors?"
in the best part:" NO, She's haunting your car!"

[AndyC]

My best was during MacLeod's first encounter with the Kurgan in Highlander. The Kurgan stabs him and is just about to lop off his head when a bunch of the other MacLeods jump him. And I said "Hey! You! Get off of Mac-Leod!"

[Umaril The Unfeathered]

During Revenge Of The Creature when the Gill-Man takes a car and overturns it.   

Pretending to be The Creature, I said " I swear, my ball rolled under this one."

[InformationGeek]

Troll 2:
Guy: They are eating her... then they are going to eat me.
Me: (Almost everytime) No s**t.

Zombieland:
When the zombies see the amusement park and the lights on.  Pretending to be the zombies:  Hey!  The park's back on!  I wanna go on the rides!
Other Zombie: Not before me!

[retrorussell]

The Final Sacrifice:
(The name Tjardus Greidanus appears onscreen)
I have to remember to go to the store and pick up a dozen greidanuses for breakfast..
Squirm:
(Roger throws a sheet of plywood down at Roger as the camera looks up at him from below)
Enjoy my crotch!