Anyone else seen ads for House of 1000 Corpses yet?

[Paquita]

i know what im talking about!!  i know BAD BAD stuff when i sees it! and this was BAD! it was painfully predictable! i could have wrote that movie in 5th grade!  and i didnt go alone! so i wasnt the only one who thought it was bad!! i had to talk my friend into not leaving many times!! everytime there was a stupid joke shed say something like "Can't we just leave and sneak into Bringing Down the House?"  MAYBE if i was 12 i would have thought it was cool  but not now that i have a working BRAIN!  But i didnt tell anyone not to go! they can go see for themselves! and well see whos right! come on lets BATTLE! lets make a bet man! im pretty confident that the secret of its badness will be revealed by many more! im really sorry though  i really wanted to like it! but  youre entitled to your own opinion even if its WRONG!!! HAHAHA!! okay okay opinions arent wrong!.. thats not funny! but you can like it! or love it! if you want! i didnt say "NO ONE LIKE THIS MOVIE IT BAD NO GO!" i just said i thought it was hot poo! and not the good kind of hot poo!

and hey! dont pick on my spelling and grammar! my grammar and punctuation may be crap but my spelling rules the world! except for my lack of apostrophes and a few abbreviations its perfect! id like to see you run that baby through a spell checker!

love colleen

[Fearless Freep]

Which name really distrubs you?

Rod Zombie or Jeffrey Dahmer?
Marilyn Manson or Ted Bundy?

[Ash]

Jeffery Dahmer...

[Chadzilla]

Graded the movie D.  The critic basically said that while Zombie made the movie gory, he failed to make it scary.  It says something about the quality of the movie (or lack thereof) that the study didn't even bother to screen it for the critics.  ALWAYS a bad sign.

Like I said, I have felt that I have already seen the movie - when it was called The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Part 2.

I'll share my thoughts when I see it on video, because this still does not look worth a ticket price.

Future Chad - A poster on another board that works for a film processing company says that Lion's Gate only ponied up for 485 prints.  The regular limited release number is between 800 to 1000 prints.  Word of mouth from other posters is scathing.  So...Lion's Gate is underselling the movie...the critic's were not allowed to see it for opening day reviews (and I don't buy for a single minute the "They won't get it" hipster excuses)...and most posters are slamming it.

Smells like Zombie dropped a cinematic turd to me.



Post Edited (04-14-03 14:29)

[Cornstore]

I saw the movie on opening day and I thought it was alright, sure it's been done before but not in a long while.  In an age where everyone thinks horror movies have to be "sleek" and "stylish" it was refreshing to see one that's not afraid to ooze slime and sleaze from every pore.  The movie does wear it's inspirations on its sleeves as you'll notice similarities to "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre", "The Hills Have Eyes" et al.  While it might not be as well done as those movies it's still somewhat enjoyable if you're a fan of the genre.  It's a carnival spookhouse ride of gore, bizarre characters and neat visuals.  It seemed like quite a few things had been cut out of the film in order for it to attain an "R" rating so it'd probably be worth seeing again when an unrated cersion is released on dvd someday.

Using this site's rating system I'd give it two and a half slimes.  Not great, but worth checking out if you're a fan of this type of movie.  I really like Rob Zombie's style, you can tell when it comes to b-movies this guy knows his stuff.  I think if he shows promise as a horror director and maybe next time he'll come up with a better script.  Plus Sid Haig is a riot as Captain Spauling, too bad he's not really the focus of the film.

[Anonymous User]

"i saw it last night! i was really sexcited and i paid $9! and it totally SUCKED ASS FARTS@!! ive never really been a huge fan of rob zombie but i respected him and i thought he was cool! i figured he knows a hot chick and a good horror movie but sadly i was proven very wrong! not only was the movie not scary or even unique the chicks werent even hot! the one chick that was kinda hot dressed like him and was so annoying it sucked all the hot out of her! it was all cliches and the jokes that they HAD to keep cracking were horrible! and it wasnt even scary in the slightest! and i saw darkness falls! and it was awful! but even that kept me up a few nights! this movie i couldnt even make fun of!! and that guy that used to host singled out and now hosts a really good show called shipmates got fat and decided to be in this movie and ruin it more! god i HATED it! and i was trying SOOO hard to like it! and my heart broke i had to let it go and confess to myself that it was crap. but i did fall for tiny, even tho he was just another gay cliche (it rhymes!) it was a bad rip off of a lot of horror movies but MOSTLY texas chainsaw massacre only covered in diarrhea.

THE ONLY GOOD THIS ABOUT THIS MOVIE!!!:
if you go, there is a scene where theres about 10 seconds of silence it seems a lot longer and everyone in the theatre shuts up, at this point you have one of the best opportunities you will ever have in your life to fart really loud and win the heart of some fine young lass such as myself, if you dont have it in you just make a fart noise!
i was really hoping someone would do it so i could leap across the seats and make fart love to him or her but it didnt happen, then i thought HEY! I CAN DO IT!! IM GONNA! but then the moment was over and my chance was lost forever."


What

[Brother Ragnarok]

I haven't seen the flick yet (I had some very important personal business to attend to on Friday that prevented me from seeing it opening night), but I have to say to all those who call it derivative...IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE!  It's a tribute to drive-in movies, so of course it's going to BE a drive-in movie much like those it's inspired by.  I don't recall anyone saying Last House On The Left was too much like I Spit On Your Grave or vice versa.  Exploitation movies don't have much to decipher between them, so give it a break.
On another note, what serious horror fan actually goes to a movie to be scared these days?  Anyone who calls him- or herself a horror fan and can be scared by any run of the mill horror movie is pretty weak in my opinion.  BOOGA BOOGA STAB! just doesn't cut it anymore.

Brother R

[Paquita]

Argh! theres a difference between inspiration or tributes and COPYING this was like pooed out horror movies! it wouldnt be so bad if it wasnt trying so hard to be something its not! i could tell it was SUPPOSED to be scary but it just wasnt working and it was trying too hard to be shocking and funny! foul language and ugly people arent funny or shocking! its just like a little kid trying to be cool and hardcore! the gore wasnt even gorey! so what if im scared by dumb movies! the fact that i wasnt scared by this says a LOT then! and ive been a horror movie fan forever! and im very forgiving! and this was just kind of insulting! and if you dont like "BOOGA BOOGA STAB" then youll HATE this cos thats all this is! im sorry but taking place in 1977 on halloween isnt inspiration or tributary its rip off dumb puke butts! i dont mean to make everyone mad but goddamn!! im really sorry!

love colleen

[jmc]

>Graded the movie D. The critic basically said that while Zombie made the >movie gory, he failed to make it scary.

So it's like DEAD ALIVE?  Hee hee....

It sounds like it's a wait-for-video anyway, so I'm not too disappointed about it not playing here.  This may be one of the movies that is enhanced by DVD anyway.

[Chadzilla]

jmc wrote:

> >Graded the movie D. The critic basically said that while
> Zombie made the >movie gory, he failed to make it scary.
>
> So it's like DEAD ALIVE?  Hee hee....
>
>

Actually the critic went off on a tangent, talking about how the movie recreates the 'Singin in the Rain' sequence from A Clockwork Orange with little effect.  He finished his review stating that Zombie's movie didn't have any balls.

And as far as Brother R's comment goes.  I've been a horror fans since the seventies, so I expect my horror to have teeth, claws, and balls.  The movie had also get me concerned about the fate of the people on the screen.  If it doesn't, then its just a gory cartoon.  Those are fine, but sometimes I want my skin to break out in gooseflesh and my blood to run cold.  Few filmmakers have the balls to actually pull that off these days, which is sad.  You are also right that most people back in the day rarely compared crap movies to crap movies.  That is because most people didn't take crap movies seriously.  That started up in the eighties or so.  Awhile back, in Carol Clover's Men Women And Chainsaws I read her article comparing/contrasting the rape and feminist slant in I Spit on Your Grave to The Accused.  It made me want to watch the movies again.  Nothing I have read about House of 1,000 Corpses (good and bad) has made be anticipate the movie as being a serious rough exploitation movie.  It just looks like Zombie has made a Scream style video for the TCM fans.  I'll catch it on video.