christmas joke!!!!!!!!!!

[macabre]

hi
Two gay men are putting up their Christmas tree:

"Something is missing!i know we need more lights on the tree<will you go to the shop and buy some for me?

"Oh okay,shrugs his lover,but only because i love you",

when he returns his partner his shaking his head,

"Something is still missing, i know we need more tinsel,get me some?
"Oh okay, but only because i love you<

when he returns his partner his shaking his head,
"One more thing then it will be perfect<

"Whats that asks his lover?

"We need a fairy stuck on top of the tree"
"f**k off, i don,t love you THAT much"

I APOLOGISE IF I HAVE OFFENDED ANYONE ON THE SITE,
what is your  fav Christmas joke?

[Umaril The Unfeathered]

Don't worry about offending anyone, Macabre.

Political correctness is killing America.  One of the reasons I loved the 80's so much-noone had a stick up their a*s when it came to this type of stuff, and shows like In Living Color made sure everyone got the treatment in equal does.

My fave joke?

The oldest lady at her church was rewarded for her loyal service of over 30 years.

As a reward, she was allowed to pick three hymns for the service that day.

As her eyes lit up, she pointed to the three best looking young men in the church, and said, " I'll take him. him, and him!"   

[The Gravekeeper]

Okay, I watch my language enough that some people could call me PC, and even I chuckled a little. What's the fun in life if we can't occasionally poke a little good-natured fun at each other and ourselves?

[Umaril The Unfeathered]

Okay, I watch my language enough that some people could call me PC, and even I chuckled a little. What's the fun in life if we can't occasionally poke a little good-natured fun at each other and ourselves?

Indeed! And this way my point about the 90's and shows like In Living Color.

One of my fave visual Christmas jokes was the one on Robot Chicken when Santa, in a car,  pulls up to 3 prostitutes and goes "Ho, ho, ho" as he pointed at each one of them. 

I started laughing so hard my face was nearly as red as Old St. Nick's himself!

[Mister X]

Why wasn't jesus born in texas?

Even God couldn't find 3 wise men and a virgin in it.

[Umaril The Unfeathered]

Why wasn't jesus born in texas?

Even God couldn't find 3 wise men and a virgin in it.

This one could easily be expounded on to include several other places in the world too.  It's too easy and too old hat.

[Leah]

Why didn't Santa Claus get to be on the good list?
Because he kept bangin his wife with the  Eggnog!

[Mr. DS]

What did rudolph find in Santa's toilet?

A Yule Log