Funniest bad one-liners

Olivia Bauer · May 03, 2011, 07:56:13 AM

"I hope you saved room for my fist because I'm going to ram it into your stomach!!"

AndyC · May 03, 2011, 08:32:56 AM

Quote from: A.J. Bauer on May 03, 2011, 07:56:13 AM
"I hope you saved room for my fist because I'm going to ram it into your stomach!!"

I have a funny feeling we'll be seeing a lot of Arnold in this thread.

"Ice to see you."

"If revenge is a dish best served cold, then put on your Sunday finest. It's time to feast."

Trevor · May 03, 2011, 08:40:30 AM

"If you keep looking at me, you'll see me kill you." ~ FREEJACK

ChocolateChipCharlie · May 03, 2011, 08:46:46 AM

"If there's one thing we can tell you, it's this - a crazy killer is crazy, and he WILL kill you."

Trevor · May 03, 2011, 09:15:31 AM

From Breakheart Pass:

The Reverend: "Simple charity to your fellow man."
John Deakin: "My 'fellow man' is about to hang me!"

AndyC · May 03, 2011, 09:16:27 AM

"Uplink underground, uplink underground. If you say that one more time, I'll uplink your ass, and you'll be underground!"

claws · May 03, 2011, 09:21:37 AM

"How about a kiss ... on my fist" - The Last Dragon (1985)

Dunno, but that line always cracks me up.

Flick James · May 03, 2011, 09:58:34 AM

Okay, I'm very sorry to do this, because it's not from a movie, but I can't resist.

I actually watch Dancing With the Stars. It is a guilty pleasure for me, and I really don't care what that says to any of you, I am a confident heterosexual.

In any case, one of the judges, Lenny, said something last night that cracked me up, but it's such a cheesy line. When giving comments on a dance, he said:

"You were like a James Bond martini. You were shakin', and I was stirred."

I'm using that line the next time I dance with my wife.

Olivia Bauer · May 03, 2011, 01:02:54 PM

Green Goblin: "Are you in or are you out?"
Spider-Man: "You're the one who's out, Gobby. Out of your MIND!"

zombie no.one · May 03, 2011, 03:52:53 PM

technically a two-liner, but dumb enough to include here

"Signal blocked?!? What does this mean?"

"It means someone's blocked the signal!!!"

- Steel Trap(2009)

Psycho Circus · May 03, 2011, 03:57:20 PM

Littlejohn: Braddock! I'm warning you, don't step on any toes.

James Braddock: I don't step on toes, Littlejohn, I step on necks.

-Missing In Action III

movie masochist · May 03, 2011, 07:18:54 PM

"If my dog had a face like yours I'd shave his ass and tell him to walk backwards."-Gleaming the Cube

JayJayM12 · May 03, 2011, 09:07:43 PM

From "The Room":

EVERY SINGLE LINE!

Archivist · May 03, 2011, 09:21:19 PM

Ah-nohld in Last Action Hero:

"You wanna be a farmer? Here's a couple of acres!" and promptly kicks a guy so hard in the nuts that he flies away.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1DxfUDZFtKQ

Billy Blanks in The King of the Kickboxers, where he finds out that the man he about to fight is the brother of the man he previously killed in a martial arts snuff movie. Note the dramatic pauses!

"YOU are the brother...! How ... perfect!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y86Jsv-o9rQ

Robocop · May 03, 2011, 11:48:49 PM

Who is your daddy, and what does he do?

Funniest bad one-liners

claws