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INVENT A BAD MOVIE SYNOPSIS!

Started by alandhopewell, November 12, 2011, 01:46:13 PM

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alandhopewell

     THEY CAME FROM LAKE WHITNEY

     After the discovery of a mysterious glowing object left behind by illegal aliens, the good citizens of Whitney, Texas are besieged by zombies who seek, not flesh or brains, but to purchase beer, cigarettes, and scratch-off lottery tickets with food stamp cards.Even worse, they're not just showing up at convenience stores, but schools, Baptist churches, and folks homes.

     After a near-disaster at Homecoming, the citizens, led by a courageous (and smart) Yankee science buff, put together a force of cyborg Dachsunds to save the day.
If it's true what they say, that GOD created us in His image, then why should we not love creating, and why should we not continue to do so, as carefully and ethically as we can, on whatever scale we're capable of?

     The choice is simple; refuse to create, and refuse to grow, or build, with care and love.

Kaseykockroach

Man with a soar throat dresses up in a bat suit to battle clowns and penguins.
Closetshipper.deviantart.com

"You wanna be a genius, it's easy. All you gotta say is, everything stinks. Then you're never wrong."

Archivist

Hippie Apocalypse aka I Spit Out Your Blood aka Drillseeker (1973)

The US government brings together a crack team of military personnel and civilian experts to battle an alien virus unleashed by the numerological alignment of 11.11.11.  The virus causes 50% of those infected to become sex-crazed hippies, the other 50% to become puritanical vampires with a penchant for floral arrangement.  But two children of the leaders of the infected factions fall in love, despite their differences.  As the cold heart of the vampire prince thaws in the sensual glow of the hippie princess' love, the world about them crumbles as the team races against time to save the world...
"Many others since have tried & failed at making a watchable parasite slug movie" - LilCerberus

akiratubo

A woman comes to believe that she is being stalked.  Her friends don't believe her and the police are useless.  Is she simply paranoid or is she actually in danger?  Finally, it is revealed that she really is being stalked -- by Superman.  Desperate, the woman contacts the only man on Earth who can help her: Batman.  Can Batman save the helpless woman from her super-powered stalker before it is too late?
Kneel before Dr. Hell, the ruler of this world!

indianasmith

EXPLODING COWS FROM MARS


Mooo . . . mooo . . . mooo  . . . . KABOOM!!!!!!
"I shall smite you in the nostrils with a rod of iron, and wax your spleen with Efferdent!!"

akiratubo

A young girl named Kitty lives a hard life on the streets, her only friend a mongrel cat.  Turns out that cat is the only friend she needs because he can transform into a were-creature at will.  Their lives are rough and they're about to get rougher, because Kitty falls into the hands of a sinister orphanage where the headmasters use the children for evil experiments in immortality.  These three psychos and their henchmen just bit off a lot more than they can chew, because Kitty's kitty is coming to the rescue!
Kneel before Dr. Hell, the ruler of this world!

zombie no.one

TRIPLE THREAT

Three sets of identical triplets win a 3 week vacation to a remote island. Little do they know the island is haunted by 3 three-eyed, three-legged creatures who developed a taste for human flesh ever since a 3 year old boy got lost on the island and ended up as a three course meal, three years previously. Can they survive the terrifying ordeal and make it off the island alive?

indianasmith

BALLERINAS VERSUS ZOMBIES

The Bolshoi troupe arrives in Dallas, TX just as the Zombie Apocalypse breaks out.  Flesh-munching undead menace flexible maidens!  Can the Russian beauties make it to the safe haven in Crawford, TX before an undead Karl Rove turns former President Bush into a four star meal?  Will Rick Perry stop jogging long enough to deal with the undead menace?  And will Danny Trejo of MACHETE be able to get his blade-weliding undocumented ninjas to Crawford in time to save the ballet season?
"I shall smite you in the nostrils with a rod of iron, and wax your spleen with Efferdent!!"

zombie no.one

BABY BOOMER

An semi-unofficial sequel to 'BIG', except this time Tom Hanks will play the part of a 55 year old man trapped in the body of an unborn fetus. Unable to speak, his lines in the movie will be subtitled. Also unable to be seen, whenever his lines come up the camera will focus on the stomach of his pregnant mother-to-be, played by Oprah Winfrey.

Leah

Ella

A Transvestite (MtF) strikes back on his friends who laughed at him for being himself and not part of the world.
yeah no.

akiratubo

Orca vs. King Kong

The U.S. Navy just can't stop a 50-foot killer whale from sinking merchant ships off the coast of Western Canada, so they mount an expedition to Skull Island in order to capture the legendary Kong, a 50-foot ape, and use him to fight the whale.  This may be easier said than done, as the expedition will have to contend with lesbian cannibals, dinosaurs, and even flying sharks sent by Orca to stop them.  If they make it through all that, they probably won't be in any shape to capture Kong.  Fortunately, the little Asian orphan girl who sneaked along on the expedition has been tinkering with just the thing to capture Kong: a giant robot!  Let's just hope the Yakuza agents sent to capture her don't get to her before she can use it ...
Kneel before Dr. Hell, the ruler of this world!

FatFreddysCat

Quote from: indianasmith on November 12, 2011, 11:26:50 PM
EXPLODING COWS FROM MARS


Mooo . . . mooo . . . mooo  . . . . KABOOM!!!!!!

I would totally pay to see this movie.  :teddyr:
"If you're a false, don't entry, because you'll be burned and died!"

Flick James

TITLE VII FROM PLUTO

Plutonians, largely peaceful and happy on their remote planet, become hostile when they learn that Earth no longer considers them a planet. They come to Earth. At first, Earthlings are amazed at the discovery of extraterrestrial life. Then, a struggle ensues as the Plutonians hire Gloria Allred in a discrimination case that goes all the way to Supreme Court.

"It's the Citizen Kane of extraterrestrial courtroom dramas," says Joel Jingoston of Burgvilleshire Gazette
I don't always talk about bad movies, but when I do, I prefer badmovies.org

The Burgomaster

THE SUFFERING BASTARDS FROM HELL VS. THE KUNG-FU SLUTS FROM MARS ON THE ISLAND OF FORBIDDEN PLEASURES (uncut European version)

No synopsis necessary.

"Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone."

Flick James

Quote from: The Burgomaster on November 14, 2011, 04:56:52 PM
THE SUFFERING BASTARDS FROM HELL VS. THE KUNG-FU SLUTS FROM MARS ON THE ISLAND OF FORBIDDEN PLEASURES (uncut European version)

No synopsis necessary.



The title IS the synopsis.  :bouncegiggle:
I don't always talk about bad movies, but when I do, I prefer badmovies.org