Nothing can numb the pain I feel right now...

[Trevor]

I knew this day was coming so I tried to man up and prepare myself for it, but it didn't help at all.   

Mom left my life on Saturday and while it is a new beginning for her (she's married, at home in the city she was born in, her future is secure, more pros than cons, etc) losing her to someone I don't know and losing the responsibility of looking after her financially and otherwise hurts.

Nothing can numb the pain, nothing. 

[indianasmith]

Time may not heal the pain, but it will make it more bearable.  I'll be thinking of you today.

[Trevor]

Time may not heal the pain, but it will make it more bearable.  I'll be thinking of you today.

Thanks Brother Indy.

[Flangepart]

Fun? No. But if she's happy, I think you can deal with it. Stay strong, compadre.

[The Burgomaster]

Hang in there.  You have friends all around the world who are here to support you.

[ER]

I'm sorry you're in pain, Trevor. I often don't handle changes well either. I have seen, though, that while closing a chapter in life can be agonizing, sometimes when you look back you see it opened up opportunities and experiences that would never have been possible if changes hadn't come. Good luck to you, and your mom also.

[zombie no.one]

big up Trevington, you are the man

[tracy]

I'm sorry you're hurting,Trev.....you're such a caring son. Just let time ease the pain and make sure you keep telling yourself how happy she is now. And how much she knows that you're strong enough to deal.
(((HUGS!!!)))

[Menard]

I knew this day was coming so I tried to man up and prepare myself for it, but it didn't help at all.   

Mom left my life on Saturday and while it is a new beginning for her (she's married, at home in the city she was born in, her future is secure, more pros than cons, etc) losing her to someone I don't know and losing the responsibility of looking after her financially and otherwise hurts.

Nothing can numb the pain, nothing. 

I don't know what that would be like, Trevor. I guess if my mother had remarried after my father's death, and moved away, that would have certainly been something to deal with.

I didn't have to deal with that as the last decade or better of my mother's life was a battle with Parkinson's, dementia, and depression; and the latter to a degree on both parts. Those last years I rarely saw her smile, rarely saw her happy, and were certainly painful years for me dealing with her disease, seeing her mind go, and eventually watching her die suddenly one morning in which my efforts to save her failed.

The familiarity of your world may have changed, and you may not have the comfort of knowing you will be just around the corner for her, but if she's happy and has reason to smile, she's ahead of the game.

Take comfort in her new found happiness. It will take time to adjust, but when the years ahead are filled with potential and the chance at a life and happiness for someone....well, not everybody has that chance, and that's something to celebrate.

It may not seem like a celebration now, but your mother has an opportunity mine didn't. Years ago, and in your shoes, without having seen the future, I don't know how I would have reacted, but I would have probably felt along the same lines as you.

Having seen what did become of my mother and how her life degraded, and given the opportunity to go back and do things differently, well that's an opportunity that doesn't exist.

You and your do have an opportunity, a threshold in life that I never saw. That's not something to be sad about or feel guilty about, but to be embraced that you have it, and to know how special that is.

Call her on the phone, tell her you love her, laugh with her, and yes, be a shoulder to cry on and a second home where she's always welcome for as long as she wants.

As the years pass and you remember the moments of happiness in your mother's life, and she can share things with you, and tell you how her day has been going....these are special moments to be had, and hold onto.


Hope I'm not being out of place....just wanted to share.

[alandhopewell]

     It'll be okay, man; you love her, and you want her to be happy. Just give yourself time to adjust.

[akiratubo]

Nothing can keep you down, man.  You're an African!  After awhile, knowing your Mother is happy and secure will bring you nothing but joy.

[Trevor]

Fun? No. But if she's happy, I think you can deal with it. Stay strong, compadre.

Thanks, Brother Flange.  

[Trevor]

Hang in there.  You have friends all around the world who are here to support you.

Thanks Brother Burgo: if it wasn't for you guys and girls, well...

[Trevor]

I'm sorry you're in pain, Trevor. I often don't handle changes well either. I have seen, though, that while closing a chapter in life can be agonizing, sometimes when you look back you see it opened up opportunities and experiences that would never have been possible if changes hadn't come. Good luck to you, and your mom also.

Thanks, ER. This is positive change for her and I am honestly happy for her but I am crushed.

[Trevor]

big up Trevington, you are the man

Thanks: you are the #1 zombie buddy: for sure.