Make A Random Statement About Something Nobody Should Care About

[ER]

The new intern says her great-grandfather fought in the German army in World War Two, and lost a leg to frostbite in Russia.

[Flangepart]

Ouch! One more proof that war is hell.

[indianasmith]

My mother in law's dog is named Ali, but I call her the Booger . . .
or the worst dog in the history of the planet, for short.

[Trevor]

I am going film hunting tomorrow: anyone want to come and join in?*

*Physical labor is required. 

[javakoala]

I am going film hunting tomorrow: anyone want to come and join in?*

*Physical labor is required. 

YES!

[Flangepart]

I refuse to treat reality with the respect it demands.

[javakoala]

Everywhere I go in my apartment, I smell cat poo.

I don't own a cat!

[Flangepart]

Why are there no fat vampires? Is it the liquid diet?

[LilCerberus]

Why are there no fat vampires? Is it the liquid diet?

There was a morbidly obese vampire in Blade.

[ER]

I've been audited every year in this century save two.

[Trevor]

I am dirty. My bath is calling me. 

[ER]

In a text my badly hungover friend just called me a "half-Mick shant." I've never been called a "half-Mick shant" before. I'm not sure what it...

Oh, OK. I looked it up. Shantytown Irish? We weren't shantytown Irish, we stuck it out over there, lol.

I swear, you take someone's credit card when they're too drunk to drive, use it to pay her a taxi and have her car towed so it won't get broken into in a bad neighborhood, and as thanks she insults your mother's people.

Just no reward for courtesy anymore. Wonder if I'm still invited to the bar mitzvah? 

[LilCerberus]

RIP Nancy Reagan.
Two weeks til spring....

[Rev. Powell]

Shelley Duvall and Ringo Starr were never married.

[ER]

For some reason our stove tilts slightly backward and left, and has all the time we've lived here, and yet we've never tried to fix that or see why it does. It's not that big a deal in most cases, except when you try to fry an egg, the egg runs to the side, and that's annoying.