Recent viewings

[indianasmith]

Last night my wife and I went to see THE LEGEND OF TARZAN at the local theater.
We both really enjoyed it - as she said, it was an "honest to gosh Tarzan movie!"  Stampeding animals, sinister Belgians exploiting the natives, lots of great Tarzan and Jane interaction, bits and pieces of the origin story woven in as flashbacks.  Alexander Skarsjard (Eric Northman from HBO's TRUEBLOOD) is an excellent Tarzan, and Margot Robbie is a feisty Jane.  Yes, there is lots of CGI, most of it well done, and a great mix of really good acting with some over the top hamming it up - and Samuel L. Jackson is great as an American agent seeking to expose the evils of Belgium's rule over the Congo.  And Djimon Hansou had a great supporting role as a native chief out to kill Tarzan.  Fun all the way around! 4.5/5 because it's not fair that the ladies got all the eye candy in this one.

[Rev. Powell]

SALO: THE 120 DAYS OF SODOM (1975): Four Italian fascists kidnap dozens of young boys and girls and imprison them in an isolated villa and sexually torture them in bizarre rituals of sadism. It has the ability to profoundly disturb, but what beyond that? It's a technically accomplished exploitation shock film, faithfully adapted from the Marquis de Sade's most pornographic and least philosophical novel, and among the biggest frauds ever proclaimed a masterpiece. 2.5/5.

[FatFreddysCat]

"Our Man in Jamaica" (1965)
http://youtu.be/wvXlcKreDFo

Yet another enjoyably cheap "Euro-spy" flick starring an American bit player as a suave secret agent. This time it's Larry Pennell (who's best remembered for playing movie star "Dash Riprock" on "The Beverly Hillbillies") as CIA agent "Zero-Zero-One," who gets sent to the islands to investigate the disappearance of a fellow operative. Along the way he gets in a bunch of fights and car chases, uncovers a massive arms-smuggling ring, and (of course) romances a hot babe. All in a day's work. Instantly forgettable, but fun while it lasted.

[Rev. Powell]

THE PASSENGER (1975): Disappointed with his life while on assignment in a remote African country, a reporter (Jack Nicholson) impulsively switches identities with the man in the hotel room next door, but naturally he is not a simple traveling salesman. The next to last shot is a technical masterpiece, but this existential grind gives you little encouragement to hang around to the end. Michelangelo Antonioni and thrillers go together like alligators and whipped cream. 2.5/5.

[indianasmith]

Last night I watched HELLDRIVER for the second time.  Arguably the most bizarre movie of all time, certainly the strangest I have ever seen.  Epic weirdness as only Japan can do it - in fact, the director did a cameo at the beginning of the film and recommended watching it drunk!

[claws]

Haunts (1977)

I Spit on your Farm: A young woman named Ingrid, who has sexual fantasies when milking a goat, becomes the target of a serial rapist. Nobody believes her and things get even more tense when Ingrid is followed by a serial killer (!). If that wasn't enough, her live in uncle also has a unhealthy attraction for Ingrid.

Cult director Herb Freed's PG rated psycho sexual sleazy with a small town setting provides enough interest to see where this film is heading. However, Haunts isn't very thrilling and can get boring at times. 2.5/5

Scream for Help (1984)

17 year old Christine is documenting her stepfather's attempt at killing her mother in a diary. Too bad Christine has a history of seeing a psychiatrist because nobody believes her seemingly wild accusations.

Notorious bad Michael Winner film with a cult following. Scream for Help plays out like a cheap movie-of-the-week TV thriller except there's nudity and over the top violence. Pretty much everything in this movie is actually over the top so in that regard its never boring. I haven't seen this train wreck since VHS rental days so this was a fun revisit. 3.5/5

Night Shadow (1989)

Escaping stress at work a TV anchorwoman goes on a much needed vacation in her home town. She meets up with her women's tank top wearing younger brother who knows karate, while refreshing her relationship with the town's hunky sheriff. Soon enough mutilated corpses pop up and the killer appears to be not human!

Low budget Werewolf offering co-starring a shirtless Kato Kaelin (!) sporting a mega mullet, Aldo Ray ripping off Hoyt Axton's Gremlins character, random and out of place kung fu fighting, Freddy Krueger reference, and a decent looking werewolf. Never seen or heard of this movie before but it is pretty bad: 1.5/5 cheese rating: 3/5

[claws]

Acts of Violence (1985)

'Shockumentary' about violence in America. This docu tries to analyze and shed more light on the San Ysidro McDonald's Massacre from 1984, the failed assassination of George Wallace from 1972 and Interviews with Serial Killer Henry Lee Lucas. Shocking indeed, and still relevant these days. 5/5

Light Blast (1985)

Erik Estrada plays a tough cop eliminating terrorists who are able to melt things and people with a heat/laser blaster of some sort. This is fine Italian trash filmed in San Fransisco. Erik's best scene is a fist fight with a hot killer nurse, the rest consists of foot and car chases. Nancy Fish makes a brief but memorable appearance and the melting effects are a straight rip off from Raiders of the Lost Ark. 3/5

Formula for a Murder (1985)

A wheelchair bound rich woman marries her therapy nurse and soon enough creepy things start to happen: a demented priest holding a bloody doll is trying to scare the woman to death. Thrilling giallo revealing the bad guys way too soon. Still a fun watch with a few well done bloody kills. 3.5/5

[lester1/2jr]

I Spit on your Farm:

please don't


Blood Spattered Bride - There are three kinds of Italian video nasty type movies: some are good, some are decent sexploitation and some are just really bad. This is somewhere between the latter two. There's no nudity or its very very brief but the two ladies are quite pretty. the Italians always get that right if nothing else.

The plot seems like they made it up as they went along: a woman has visions or something of some blonde evil woman and they have a painting that looks like her and then they meet her.  The way they meet her is the most interesting part of the movie: she is buried up to her neck on the beach wearing a scuba mask and snorkel. The husband very casually starts to dig her out and digs where her boobs are out first then meananders over to the car to get her a shirt or something. good way for a character to make an entrance anyway. the husband is a huge jerk in a way that's actually sort of funny sometimes if totally random.

None of it means anything or makes any sense or point. It's a stupid movie with 2 good looking women being dumb. Occasionally there is a castle or they are out in a field near some ruins some okay tourist shots there

2/5

[Mofo Rising]

Spies Like Us (1985)

Several years back, somebody posted a thread asking what good editing is. It's an interesting question, one I still don't have a good answer to. Editing is a vital part of film making, but it's hard to get a handle on, because if the editor really does their job well, they're invisible.

Well, whatever good editing involves, this film has none of it. It's not good. How bad does a movie have to be when you start questioning the editor?

As an '80s kid, I always thought that maybe I just was not getting this movie. ('80s kids watched the same five movies hundreds of times on HBO.) Now I'm old. Turns out this movie is just crap.

2 out of 5 stars. (It did have it's moments.)

[claws]

Future Hunters (1986)

Robert Patrick (Terminator 2) plays Slade, the boyfriend of some blonde chick digging for artifacts in the sandy outskirts of "L.A." The girlfriend is suddenly attacked by three random bikers, Slade is knocked out, and some time traveler (Richard Norton) from the year 2025 appears. He is in possession of the holy spear that was used on Jesus on the cross back in the day. After eliminating the bikers he is shot. While driving him to a hospital in "L.A." the traveler asks "what is L.A.?" before dying. Soon enough an evil gang of Nazis with world domination on their mind are trying to get their hand on the spear, forcing Slade and his girlfriend to fly to the Philippines to solve the spear mystery. This is a good thing because now they don't have to pretend being in "L.A." anymore since the entire movie was filmed in Manila from the get go. Anyway, upon arrival they are joined by actor Bruce Li who helps Slade defeat an evil monk in a drawn out kung fu match. Along the way Bruce Li somehow disappears without explanation, leaving Slade and Blondie on a quest through a jungle where they meet feisty midgets, tough Amazon Women, killer Crocodiles, Pythons and a picture of Adolf Hitler.

Director Cirio H. Santiago threw in everything from Mad Max, The Terminator, Temple of Doom and Romancing the Stone. The outcome is outrageously trashy, awfully bad but still sort of entertaining. I didn't know this was one of Santiago's "better" offerings. I wasn't super impressed but it certainly had its moments. 2.5/5

[lester1/2jr]

Honeymoon (2014) - If I ever get married I'm sure my honeymoon will be exactly like this. It's a "they came back from the thing weird" variation that hits it dead on with it's manipulation of what I'm sure is a common fear: a honeymoon takes a wrong turn with jealousy, fear, and suspicion as a result. Is the guys wife clandestinely hooking up with her old flame? or is something even more horrible afoot?

It starts out with some pretty excrutiating boy/ girl newlywed lovey dovey ness which I guess is to make it more accessible but boy did I have enough of millenials making googly eyes and terrible jokes at each other. When it becomes a horror movie it really works though. Granted, I am not good at figuring out plot twists and so forth but they took their time and got it right. I'm not super picky and again, not the type to sit there and do detective work about the movie I'm watching but it's not the 70's you have to figure that stuff out before you start filming. No obvious Flightplan why didn't they just call the airport type stuff here.

I don't watch Game of thrones but the redhead from that is the star. She's not super charming but she and the actor are better than most horror movie actors. I loved it. If you are a fan of stuff like "another earth" it would probably help.

5/5

[indianasmith]

This afternoon I watched the classic sci-fi film from 1957, 20 MILLION MILES TO EARTH.

I haven't seen this one since I was a small child, and forgot just how good it really was.  The stop-motion effects were amazing, especially the battle between the Ymir and the elephant - some of Ray Harryhausen's finest work.  Sure beats the SYFY Channel's CGI monsters!  Storyline was decent too, and the monster was a creature you could actually feel sorry for. 5/5

[indianasmith]

Yesterday I was VERY sick - fever actually spiked up north of 104 at one point.
So I laid  bed and watched movies.
I saw LONDON HAS FALLEN, which was really good - Gerard Butler reprises his role from OLYMPUS HAS FALLEN as a Secret Service agent protecting an American President (played by Aaron Eckhart) from terrorists who want to kidnap and execute him live on the internet.  Lots of explosions and shots fired, high body count, classic landmarks being blown up left and right.  Kind of fun in a "let's blow up the world" sort of way.  4/5

Then I watched the modern Cannibal Mutant Hillbilly classic, the 2006 remake of THE  HILLS HAVE EYES.  I rather like that one.  CMH movies are one of my favorite horror genres. 4/5

After that I watched four episodes of the second season of HBO's ROME series, one of my all-time favorite historical dramas.

Then I went to sleep and sweated so much that I woke up feeling like a banana left in a Ziploc baggie in a hot car!

[indianasmith]

Day 2 of being sick.  Ugggh.
This morning I watched SNAKES ON A PLANE, one of those movies that is so bad that it's oddly awesome.  Samuel L. Jackson does a great job as an FBI Agent assigned to protect a critical witness against crime lord Eddie Kim, who comes up with a unique way to silence this witness:  planting several hundred venomous snakes on the jetliner and soaking the leis with a pheromone to make the snakes super aggressive.  Pure bad movie gold!  4/5

And I followed it up with one of the best zombie movies of the 80's or any other decade: RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD.  I'll admit, it's been a few years, I had forgotten just how gorgeous Linnea Quigley was in this movie.  But Linnea and her assets notwithstanding, this movie is funny and horrifying at the same time.  How do you kill something that's already dead?  "It's not a bad question, Burt!" 5/5

[BoyScoutKevin]

Shadow of the Tower
Episode 11
The Strange Shapes of Reality
48.10

64. If the men here come across as being irrational, then here the women come across as being more rational.

65. People portrayed, excluding King Henry VII
a. Perkin Warbeck didn't know how good he had it. So, of course he screws everything up.

66. The more things change. The more they stay the same.
a. Countries are still trying to strike deals that deal with trade.

67. His children and grandchildren could have learned something from their father and grandfather King Henry VII about showing mercy to one's enemies.

68. 50 sovereigns then = 25,000 sovereigns now = about $32,500 now. Still cheap at double that price.

69. It is better to be respected then loved.

Shadow of the Tower
Episode 12
The Fledging
49.19

70. People portrayed, excluding King Henry VII
a. Arthur would/should/could have been King Arthur I, but . . .?! he died of natural causes as a teenager, leaving his crown and wife to his younger brother Henry, who became King Henry VIII.
b. Will we ever see Katherine?
c. Henry, not even in his teens yet, but . . .?! already showing signs of harshness of character.
d. Edward, Earl of Warwick. Like many of King Henry VII's foes, more simple, less smart. Of course, it did not help that he spend o'er half of his life imprisoned, with the shadow of death always hanging o'er him.

71. Man marries boy. No. It is not what you think. The Spanish ambassador, as a stand-in for Katherine, who is still in Spain, marries young Arthur.

72. The more things change. The more they stay the same.
a. agents provocateur

73. Swallow up Scotland. 100 years later, Scotland would swallow up England, as James of Scotland, became king of both Scotland and England.

74. Use your fingers to eat. Now we use forks.

75. People and one's conscience. One and the same. That'd change.

76. Death makes some of us stronger, and some of us weaker.

77. Freedom comes in many forms.

78. Hindsight is not only 20/20. It is also ironic.

Next time: episode 13 and the final episode