The Unofficial Badmovies.org Random Thought Thread!

[ER]

Here are some things my husband of seven years wishes were different about me....

He sincerely wishes I'd get on board with his plan to make Oklahoma stop sucking so much, so that Texas would fall into the ocean. Or at least Austin and more recently up near Dallas.

He sincerely wishes I had a girlfriend and would bring her home a few times a month when he's around. And just to be clear by 'girlfriend' I am not speaking Oprah-ese.

He wishes I would stop referring to our children's teachers as 'Nazis' the principal as 'Hitler' and the campus as 'Dachau'.

He wishes I would lose my aversion to eating foods that owe their existence to sexual intercourse.

He wishes I would quit talking so wistfully about having one last baby before I'm forty.

He wishes I would leave my pistol in the car when I go into Dunkin' Donuts before school.

He wishes I would get a cavity or a speeding ticket just once so I would stop bragging.

He wishes I would reconsider theism.

He wishes I would get another agent and go back to writing.

He wishes I would....well nevermind.

He wishes I would quit following Neil Gaiman. And by 'following' I mean 'offline" and by 'offline' I mean 'stalk' and by 'stalk' I mean 'living in his basement when he's not home'.

And he wishes I would find less joy in deciding where I will be buried someday (I will know the spot when I see it!) and while on that subject, that I'd change my mind about my stated wish that when I die my wedding ring goes to one of our daughters and that I be buried wearing my 1990s engagement ring given to me by a different man.

But most of all he wishes I liked to travel more than I do.

Other than all this, though, it's nice that he thinks I'm doing all right.

[indianasmith]

Geez, I'd only change ONE thing about my wife!!!   

[AoTFan]

Had copy of The Walking Dead vol one for sale on eBay.  Got an offer, but then, before I could mail it, the younger dog got at it and chewed up the side a little bit.  I told the buyer about what happened, sent him a pic and he canceled the order, so I refunded his money (only wish this had all happened BEFORE I bought the postage to send the book.)  

Now I got a book that probably won't sell.  I wonder if I could deliberately chew on it some and sell it as a rare, "Walker Bite Mark" Edition?

[Alex]

Here are some things my husband of seven years wishes were different about me....

He sincerely wishes I'd get on board with his plan to make Oklahoma stop sucking so much, so that Texas would fall into the ocean. Or at least Austin and more recently up near Dallas.

He sincerely wishes I had a girlfriend and would bring her home a few times a month when he's around. And just to be clear by 'girlfriend' I am not speaking Oprah-ese.

He wishes I would stop referring to our children's teachers as 'Nazis' the principal as 'Hitler' and the campus as 'Dachau'.

He wishes I would lose my aversion to eating foods that owe their existence to sexual intercourse.

He wishes I would quit talking so wistfully about having one last baby before I'm forty.

He wishes I would leave my pistol in the car when I go into Dunkin' Donuts before school.

He wishes I would get a cavity or a speeding ticket just once so I would stop bragging.

He wishes I would reconsider theism.

He wishes I would get another agent and go back to writing.

He wishes I would....well nevermind.

He wishes I would quit following Neil Gaiman. And by 'following' I mean 'offline" and by 'offline' I mean 'stalk' and by 'stalk' I mean 'living in his basement when he's not home'.

And he wishes I would find less joy in deciding where I will be buried someday (I will know the spot when I see it!) and while on that subject, that I'd change my mind about my stated wish that when I die my wedding ring goes to one of our daughters and that I be buried wearing my 1990s engagement ring given to me by a different man.

But most of all he wishes I liked to travel more than I do.

Other than all this, though, it's nice that he thinks I'm doing all right.

Suggest to him you'd be open to the idea of a girl friend on the condition he gets a boy friend. Nine times out of ten that solves that problem. The other time... well I am going to say that was a couple that just wasn't meant to be together as it happened.

[ER]

Here are some things my husband of seven years wishes were different about me....

He sincerely wishes I'd get on board with his plan to make Oklahoma stop sucking so much, so that Texas would fall into the ocean. Or at least Austin and more recently up near Dallas.

He sincerely wishes I had a girlfriend and would bring her home a few times a month when he's around. And just to be clear by 'girlfriend' I am not speaking Oprah-ese.

He wishes I would stop referring to our children's teachers as 'Nazis' the principal as 'Hitler' and the campus as 'Dachau'.

He wishes I would lose my aversion to eating foods that owe their existence to sexual intercourse.

He wishes I would quit talking so wistfully about having one last baby before I'm forty.

He wishes I would leave my pistol in the car when I go into Dunkin' Donuts before school.

He wishes I would get a cavity or a speeding ticket just once so I would stop bragging.

He wishes I would reconsider theism.

He wishes I would get another agent and go back to writing.

He wishes I would....well nevermind.

He wishes I would quit following Neil Gaiman. And by 'following' I mean 'offline" and by 'offline' I mean 'stalk' and by 'stalk' I mean 'living in his basement when he's not home'.

And he wishes I would find less joy in deciding where I will be buried someday (I will know the spot when I see it!) and while on that subject, that I'd change my mind about my stated wish that when I die my wedding ring goes to one of our daughters and that I be buried wearing my 1990s engagement ring given to me by a different man.

But most of all he wishes I liked to travel more than I do.

Other than all this, though, it's nice that he thinks I'm doing all right.

Suggest to him you'd be open to the idea of a girl friend on the condition he gets a boy friend. Nine times out of ten that solves that problem. The other time... well I am going to say that was a couple that just wasn't meant to be together as it happened.

Ha, yeah, Alex, that'd be fair, I guess, good point.

It's just an ongoing personal joke between us of late. "Sounds like you need a girlfriend in your life...and I need to follow you two around."

In fact I posted all that broad hyperbole because he was kidding me yesterday that he was going to come read what I said here, but I don't think he really is.

And in reality I only took a firearm into a donut shop once but he has never let me live it down.

[Rev. Powell]

My next-door neighbor died the other day, but I never talk to them (just wave or say "hi"), so I'm not sure if I should express condolences or not.

[Leah]

My next-door neighbor died the other day, but I never talk to them (just wave or say "hi"), so I'm not sure if I should express condolences or not.

Probably should.

In other news, I bought a corset. Why? Well a girl I was talking to said that I should, saying that it's fun to be laced up. So I did.

[ER]

I had planned to go swimming tonight but instead I find myself helping three children with homework, SO I am going to send some fulfillment from my own work tomorrow over to each teacher's house, with a note: I need this by Monday morning.

Turnabout, you know.

[AoTFan]

My next-door neighbor died the other day, but I never talk to them (just wave or say "hi"), so I'm not sure if I should express condolences or not.

Probably should.

In other news, I bought a corset. Why? Well a girl I was talking to said that I should, saying that it's fun to be laced up. So I did.

The corset's for her, right?

[Alex]

The kitten is currently banished from my presence. I was sitting around enjoying some quiet time while Kristi was still sleeping. I'd pulled on some PJs to relax in when Dagon decided to jump up into my lap. He made this jump attempt while standing between my feet, and sank his claws into my PJ's to climb up. Unfortunately certain tender parts of my anatomy were not adequately protected by said PJs and felt his needle sharp claws sink into them. When I yelled at him he shot off into some dark corner and hasn't came back near me since. Which as much as I love cats is a damn good thing for him right now.

[Alex]

Found the plans for something I had wanted to make as my 2nd year project when I was at college.

It was an idea that came to me one day while I was out with my mum and gran and they were clothes shopping. After spending over an hour in one shop without them buying anything and at the same time wondering what I could make for my final project, then it struck me.

I spent the next couple of days and nights feverishly working away on the plans for the electrics and finally the blue prints were ready. I was ready to liberate mankind and revolutionise shopping trips.

Its was the Mk I Electro Shock Coller. You simply put it on the woman you were with, set a timer to say 15 minutes, or if you are feeling generous maybe even 30 and if she is still in the shop after that time she would get a small electric shock. After a minute this would be repeated with an increase in voltage until the female in question left the shop.

Unfortunately our lecturer said it wasn't a suitable invention for my project, so I made a 555 timer instead (basically the maths part of a computer). I can't understand why she was so against the whole idea.

[Alex]

*sigh* Just went into my toilet to discover that judging from the yellow puddle in it that the cat thinks it is part of his litter tray. I put the shower on full and turned the water to ice cold to clean it out when the kitten as he normally does ran over to investigate the sound of running water, so he was standing there on the edge of the shower.

Somehow as I turned around my foot accidently caught him, just enough to push his entire body right under the cold spray. Anyone who thinks the speed of light can't be broken has never seen a cat move when sprayed with cold water.

[ER]

Wonder if I am the only person here who doesn't have HBO?

Also, that's funny about your cat and the shower, Alex.

[AoTFan]

Speaking of fantasy football... I sometime wonder if I, a guy who knows NOTHING about football, would have the same (if not better) results picking random players for my team than a so-called football expert, similar to the experiment where they found that a chimpanzee throwing darts at the wall picked stocks better than several financial "experts".

[Rev. Powell]

Speaking of fantasy football... I sometime wonder if I, a guy who knows NOTHING about football, would have the same (if not better) results picking random players for my team than a so-called football expert, similar to the experiment where they found that a chimpanzee throwing darts at the wall picked stocks better than several financial "experts".

No. He'd pick injured players, take kickers too high, mistakes like that we see people make all the time. But if he drafted off a list compiled by an expert with a few minutes of expert advice he'd probably do as well. I've seen it happen before.

The chimp in the experiment picked stocks as well as the experts because of something called the "efficient market hypothesis." That theory says that the market prices every stock is perfectly and therefore each equally likely to increase in value. It's almost certainly true but there are lots of wrinkles.