"No Seriously, we're REALLY out of ideas!" - Hollywood

[trekgeezer]

Today I saw a blurb about someone wanting to make a big screen version of  The Partridge  Family .  This would be okay if they used the original cast  on a reunion tour, the first scene would have to be bailing Bonaduce out of jail for beating the hell out of someone.

[Flangepart]

Susan wrote:

> Try remaking films that totally suck, from there you can only
> go up and perhaps make a descent little film

YES!
Lets see....The Giant Claw....The Creeping Terror....The Black Scorpion.....Grizzly.....Okey, they don't totaly suck....REPTILICUS!....but, they could use a makeover!.....King Kong Vs. Godzilla?.....

[Yaddo42]

They seem to be less "remakes" these days than "cashing in on the name recognition of titles of better films". Other than the Mini Cooper the remake of "The Italian Job" was just the usual misfits get revenge for slain mentor on former team member who betrays them. In the original the slain man was just so damn proud of his caper idea he wanted it to live on even if he didn't. Caine's (and Noel Coward's) motivations were greed and one upmanship of the Mafia (with a little British pride thrown in, in Coward's case).

My personal theory on remakes is that you should remake flawed gems, good ideas that went bad in production, or films that don't have such a large devoted following that you are sure to alienate the core audience. If Hollywood wants to make a film about brainwashed soldiers from the Gulf War, fine, just don't call it "The Manchurian Candidate". What does the the Gulf War have to do with Cold War paranoia and the Chinese? Are the Chinese and the Iraqis working together in the remake?

Since it seems no one can make a sports movie about a team of ragtag underdogs (especially if they are kids) where the team loses at the end anymore, wanna bet they change the ending of the "Bad New Bears" remake?

[Jay]

I love the original and probably would definitely go see the re-make.

It's *your* fault!

You just don't notice it as much cause they change the title.

Nope, it's still pretty obvious.

[The Ghoul]

The only time I like remakes is if the follow the book from which a film was based MORE closely. Example: the animated Lord of the Rings made in the late 70's was pretty sucky and left the last half completely off...the Peter Jackson Lord Of The Rings was bang on perfection even thou a few of the actors I had no interest in seeing. The two movies really don't even compare but the animated version was first. A good enough reason to remake is if they can make the movie more intense for modern viewers like Cape Fear. Deniro was over the top and made a memorable villian. But almost all remakes suck or are bad choices in picking a classic that doesn't need a new approuch. Example: The shot for shot remake of Psycho was an utter joke and an example of a horrible waste of film remake. If Hollywood needs to remake something the Logun's Run remake I've heard about is not a bad idea if it is trying to stick to the original book. A remake there wouldn't hurt, the original mid 70's movie is pretty sucky and laughable in parts.

[raj]

the 1970s LOTR was meant to be a two parter, but since the first part bombed, the second half was never made.  Smart move by Peter Jackson to do the whole thing at once.

Maybe someone should do a remake of Deathstalker or Barbarian Queen. . .

[jmc]

I thought TROY was a remake of DEATHSTALKER....or at least Brad Pitt sure looks like him.

[Writer]

Speaking of Bible passages and lack of originality, did you hear about that "Saved!" movie that's coming out from MGM? "Hey, let's follow up on Mel Gibson! They'll really want to see this film!" NOT! I sure hope "Saved!" ends up reviewed here someday, because I'm already imagining some of the material we'll be seeing in the "lessons" section:

- Private Christian schools are dominated by huge cardboard cut-outs of Jesus.
- Promoting premarital sex in schools is a brave and revolutionary new idea.
- Christians believe the best way to cure homosexuals is to have sex with them.

What's really funny about this lamer teen comedy is that it's probably going to go straight to DVD; even the producers seem to have a vague notion that it's not going to put very many butts in theater seats.

Hollywood never learns. "Well, we lost 20 million dollars on that last one, but we sure got rave reviews for our daring from all the big-name critics. Let's try some more religious films; the controversy alone will get us some turnout!"

Ha! I just wonder how much longer it'll be until Hollywood finally runs out of money.  Even their attempts to be offensive are getting boring.

[Yaddo42]

It's funny that The Ghoul mentioned "Cape Fear" and remakes. I agree that remakes that adhere closer to an original source book can be good; but both versions of "Cape Fear" are rare examples of "the movie being better than the book" syndrome. Past the early setup, both expand on events in "The Executioners" by John D. MacDonald and are more interesting for it. In both Max Cady is a character of some kind rather than just a drunken brute who says little and seems to think even less.

OTOH, I would like to see a more straight forward adaptation of Heinlein's "Starship Troopers" done at some point. I liked the fascism/patriotism/war satire material Verhoven put in his version, but other than character names and a few political themes (that he made fun of) the movie had so little to do with the book it could have been called something else.

I've reached the point with remakes that whenever I see one announced on TV or read about one (especially the one that get mentioned on SciFi's website) I tend to wince and yell "WHY?" even though I know already......$$$.

[Gerry]

Yaddo42 wrote:

> OTOH, I would like to see a more straight forward adaptation of
> Heinlein's "Starship Troopers" done at some point.

It has been done.  It's an all CGI animated series called Roughnecks: The Starship Troopers Chronicles and it's much closer in tone and style to Heinlein's original novel.

[Eirik]

Here's a new one I just heard about: Steve Martin as Inspector Cluseau...

Come on.  I think some people in this thread made good arguments for some remakes, but Cluseau should have died with Peter Sellers.  In a million years, Steve Martin will not be as funny in this particular role.

[Mr_Vindictive]

Eirik,

Atleast it's not a remake.  It's actually going to be intitled "Son Of The Pink Panther".  Just a continuation of a great series of films.

[raj]

And now they're going to bring The Dukes of Hazard to the big screen . . . with Jessica Simpson as Daisy Duke.

[trekgeezer]

Here are some more: Altered States, Alfie,  and the Amityville Horror,

[Silver Dragon]

"Yeah, HollyWood does stink. But hey, Peter Jackson is working on a re-make of King Kong, which is cool!"