The Beastmaster

[Rabbit]

There was a strange bit of editing with Beastmaster back when TNT started showing it.  They've redone the ending slightly.  In the original version, one of Dar's little ferret buddies dies, sacraficing itself in the final battle.  When TNT got a hold of the movie, and to make the sequels work better, they did some reshooting and now the ferret lives!  Older video stores will still have copies with the original version on the shelves for those sad ending/ferrit haters out there.

[Tryst]

I was dragged to this hunk of crap when it first came out (I was 14).  The Beastmaster has the dubious distinction of being the first movie I ever walked out on (I went and played video games while my friends watched the last 30mins).  Not even a near naked Tanya Roberts could capture my attention.  Gawd this movie sucks.  And is it just me or is Marc Singer freaking cross-eyed? You don't often find that physical characteristic in a leading man/action hero.

[Paul H.]

It's almost hard to call this a bad movie.  It does show signs of quality, a storyline, and actual effort by the director, producer,and cast.  (those batman things are freaky) If this is a bad movie you almost have to include dragonslayer, willow, connan, and krull. (which I think suck more). (ok krull is a bad movie)

If you call this a B-movie then it is the stuff just below the cream.  Now it's sequels are truly entertaining bad movies.  They are almost better than beastmaster as they are so much worse in quality.

Beastmaster gets a 6.5-7.5 out of 10 or (4 green globs)  Although this movie should be watched with friends and in the afternoon as there are better choices for evening movie entertainment.  A good movie but not really a good bad movie, if you know what I mean.

[Bill Stern (scuzzbopper@mail.epeespice.com)]

Now, you gotta be honest about this one.  It suct. Yes, I know I spelled it wrong.  But, like any good, er, bad movie, it's fun to watch.  I mean, where can you hear such wonderful scripting with lines like "We must FIIIGHT!!" "No, we must FLEEEEE!!" in it? Besides, naked women almost always hold my attention. And you gotta give ol' Rip credit for making a quick save at the sacrificial scene ("Er, SEE!! R has spoken, he wants your children!!")  This is a movie that well deserves its bad movie status.

[Teko]

Beastmaster's a classic bad movie, but a lot of fun. You have to love any movie where the bad guy's done in by a ferret.

[Mortanius]

Doesn't anyone else find that thing he does with his ferrets where he picks one up in each hand and hefts them somewhat disturbing? I have a ferret at home and I heft him once in a while to see what that's about.  It's not all it's cracked up to be.

[Michael]

This film will always be a childhood favorite of mine, and I love it just as much today as I did back then. #2 was a disappointment, but at least #3 paid respect to the original but featuring many of the same characters and making referrence to events in the first film. Anxiously awaiting another, one that is just as good as the first, but I doubt we'll ever see one.

[Mike Berkey]

The first time I watched this movie I was in gradeschool and the librarian wheeled it out to keep my class amused during an empty hour (not sure why).  Nothing like seeing eye rings, freaky bat creatures and semi-nudity to instill values in children.  Besides that, one of my more favorite fantasy films, although it doesn't rank as high in my book as the old Ray Harryhausen films.

[BoyScoutKevin]

To show everyone, where I was coming from, when I first saw that movie. I felt worst about the death of the ferret in the film, then I did about any of the 101 people who died in it, even the children. Anyway, this and "Krull" (See below)
are two of the best fantasy films to come from the early '80's. 1980's that is. Enjoy.

[Honest Annihilator]

Sometimes when my two small children are running amok, and the cats are throwing up, and the dog is rolling over in something dead, and my wife is out of town on business, I just throw my arms out and declare "I AM THE BEASTMASTER!".

Nothing happens of course, but I feel somehow stronger and better able to cope.  Even though nobody else gets the joke.

[Bats]

So whatever happened to Marc Singer then?  He was in 'V' and then, erm... what?

Very silly film, this, but then show me a sword 'n' sorcery flick that isn't.  There was a lot of this stuff about in the 80s - Beastmaster, Conan, Krull, Hawk The Slayer (oh God, no!!)... and then the movie makers got the message that nobody actually watches films about cauliflower-eared sword swingers in rough leather posing pouches with names like Dar, Zad or Thrud and with (bizarrely) Austrian accents.

Nice ferrets though, but I bet he didn't put them down his trousers.

[Nutty]

I remember watching this when it first came out! I enjoyed it then and still enjoy it now. It was an original idea and peice coming out of some really dismal crap out there. I understand it isn't the great film work of our time but it sure helps pass the time on a gloomy day. Look at it as a fantasy with charm. Who wouldn't have liked to been the beastmaster themselves at one time or other. Go ahead admit it, you have but are to coward to own up it for fear that anybody would find out. WHIMP!  
(And I liked Krull as well For its fresh idea and new twist to the fantasy realms as well) People who didn't like these movies could never appreciate the works of mythology and Fanatsy realms. Like Excalibur what an awesome peice of work!

[The Saint]

The tar did not explode, its fumes would have.  I don't know why the horde did not smell it however, probab;y because they stank worse.
Also, Ferrets AER Klepto's, worse than magpies.
Thirdly, In the time setting for this movie cousins marrying was not considerred wrong, it was a while later, still sick though.

[The Congo Kid]

Beastmaster was a great movie (despite a few minor details, such as Dar french kissing with his own flesh-and-blood and a couple plot flaws).  Its too bad they ruined the Beastmaster legend with those two follow-up flicks.  Beastmaster II, where Dar travels back into time, sucked rocks (did anyone else who saw that notice that he had both of his ferrets back?  Didn't the one die while biting the evil priest in the first movie?).  And the third film looked like it was nothing more than a low-budget, made-for-T.V. movie (they MAYBE could have made a good series out of the Beastmaster from that show like they did Hercules, but why push it.)  Why aren't those other two flicks on here, though?  Those were worse than the first film.

[Doug Bodden]

I watch this whenever it's on. Fun stuff. I recall one of my English teachers from high school showing us a tape he'd recorded from PBS of 'Death of a Salesman' but at the very beginning there was a bit from the start of "Beastmaster" that he hadn't fully taped over. He did a low manly voice and yelled, "How about a little Beastmaster, arrrrr!" It was cool.

If Tanya Roberts was my cousin, I'd do go for it. Hell, I'd probably go for it if she was my sister...