Things I learned from the movies.....

[Menard]

Woman always dress and undress in front of a window with the curtains open.

I wish!

Not that I...ahem...would watch.

[Trevor]

 

Hi Menard ~ four words for you:

Body Double
Bedroom Eyes

Yowza. 

[Dr. Whom]

Ah, but Body Double was a set up, so it doesn't count.

[Yaddo 42]

Brighton Beach Memoirs - can't believe I'm posting that film on this forum.

Bleeding from your mouth is always one lone bright red stream from the corner, unless you are dying. Then you will either cough or spit up lots of the the stuff or your teeth will be tinted pink with it while you smile bravely and make some lame joke to left the spirits of the people around you.

Pistols are more accurate than long arms if you are a hero. Firing one handed works even better if you have to fire a shot when accuracy really counts.

There's always places to bob and weave in and out of in traffic during a car chase so you don't have to ever stop.

The more loyal your best friend is at the beginning of a film, the deeper the betrayal later on. If you are both female, the friend is sleeping with your husband/boyfriend/significant other - see any Lifetime Movie.

All women in trouble are really really hot. Especially if you are a private investigator, down on his luck and really needing work, any work.

[ghouck]

Dead-Alive:
There is a systematic approach to putting the eyes back in a corpse after being poped out due to overpressure during the embalming process.

Priests are not very good at making out.


Bad Taste:
Aliens have a fibula.

Chainsaws make very accurate cuts with tight radii.


Naked Lunch:
William tell did not put an apple on his son's head, it was a drinking glass.

Adultry is fine, as long as there are drugs involved and it is amongst friends.

[LilCerberus]

Whoever is in the vicinity of a pool of gasoline alway has a clasic Zippo Windproof(TM) which they are perfectly willing to part with.

[Poogie]

This might be a girl thing. When someone rinses out their mouth, after brushing their teeth, they spit into the sink but they don't rinse out the sink.   

[clockworkcanary]

You can punch, fall, or drive a motorcycle through a huge plane glass window without a single laceration!

You can avoid/escape/evade a large explosion by diving into water, thus avoiding concussive damage and flying debris.

If someone hangs up on you, you're obligated to repeat, "hello? hello? hello?" even if it was obvious what just happened.

If you're a rebel cop you're not allowed to shave!

You can konk someone on the head and knock them out with ease...and of course, they will sustain no injury from it at all.

Placing a tissue over a young woman's mouth and nose for even a nanosecond will knock them out completely!

If you make a statement that's the least bit sceptical (not being superstitious) you will be proven wrong/made an example out of.

All life's major problems can be encountered, endured, and dealt with in time spans of 30 minutes, 60 minutes, or 90 minutes.

[raj]

This might be a girl thing. When someone rinses out their mouth, after brushing their teeth, they spit into the sink but they don't rinse out the sink.   

What's this "rinse out the sink" thing?

[Him]

Aliens eat animals while they are still alive.

[Poogie]

This might be a girl thing. When someone rinses out their mouth, after brushing their teeth, they spit into the sink but they don't rinse out the sink.   

What's this "rinse out the sink" thing?

EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW....The next person that goes in there to wash their hands or do whatever and there's this blob of toothpaste and spit and who knows what stuck to the side of the sink. EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWW......It's gross.        

[Viktorcrayon]

It is a girl thing... Just like showering! It's not manly.

[Poogie]

The funny thing about it is the last time I saw this happen was on Desperate Housewives.....and it was a woman who did it.
I watched a video on the differences between a man and a woman taking a shower and it was really funny, but I wouldn't be able to put it on here, it was on YouTube. 

[Viktorcrayon]

Yeah, i watched that video as well. Very accurate!

[dean]

One thing I learnt that just occured to me recently, is that every good, funny, life-changing, hilarious or terrifying road trip involves someone dying...