Attack Of The Gryphon

[CoreyHeldpen]

Sometimes I feel as though I've been too harsh on a movie in a review. I feel this way about Bloodthirst 2: Revenge Of The Chupacabras (seriously, I do) and possibly The Beast From Haunted Cave. But believe me when I say Attack of The Gryphon deserves every little bit of criticism I can throw at it. This is one of the Sci Fi Channel's absolute worst. Its terrible even by their standards. It isn't the worst movie ever made, no, but it is somewhere on my bottom 50.

After an completely inept opening scene, we are introduced to two warring kingdoms. What they are fighting over, I cannot tell you, because I either missed the explanation, or the writers forgot to include it. Both of these are equally likely. After the king of one kingdom loses his son in a skirmish, be makes up some bullcrap lie about the dead prince wanting revenge and sends the princess back out against allegedly impossible odds (although the factions looked rather equally matched to me). Meanwhile, the scummy alchemist suggests the king summon the Gryphon, their kingdom's ancient guardian.

The Gryphon is summoned and begins attacking both armies in a scene that would actually have been pretty cool if not for the dreadful (and I mean DREADFUL, the Gryphon's feathers look like paper, and its beak looks like plasticine) CGI effects. The prince and princess of the rival kingdoms find themselves caught up in a prophecy (goddammit, I hate prophecies) that requires them to team up against the sorcerer responsible for the rampaging Gryphon before the next eclipse, in which both the crazed magician and the monster become immortal, thus ruling both kingdoms. This, of course, is bad.

This movie really sucks. The monster is less important to the story than Bloodthirst 2, looks worse than the ones in Night Feeders, and sucks harder than the one from Blood Tide. Sure, its cool the first time the Gryphon pulls an arrow out of itself, but it gets old fast, considering it pulls about five arrows out of itself during the course of the film. Plus, as aforementioned, the CGI representing it is dreadful. The acting, direction, and writing are only ever so slightly better. There's not much more I can say to get my point across that this film, as I said just moments before, really sucks. Even by SFCOM (Sci Fi Channel Original Movie) standards.

Attack Of The Gryphon really is a terrible movie. I'm not even going to try to defend it. Its just bloody lame from beginning to end.

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