DUMB FILM you've seen in the last year ? HOUSE ON THE EDGE OF THE PARK

[DodgingGrunge]

Unfortunately, my chronological memory is only good for maybe one or two weeks past, so I have no way of knowing what happened a year ago.

I revisited The Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of Yik Yak recently because I made a reference to it and my girlfriend didn't believe it was a real movie.  That certainly qualifies as stupid, but I thought it was thoroughly entertaining.

I must say the Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie was dumb in an infinitely painful way.  Rather than reinventing the format, like Mike Judge did with Beavis and Butthead's feature film, they simply dragged out the same formulaic craziness for 90 minutes, utterly destroying the effect.  But I really should owe up to my responsibility in the matter... how good could it have been? 

The dumbest [movie] I've seen in the past year is... DEATH PROOF (2007)

I actually enjoyed Death Proof.  I'm quite surprised at how many people in these forums hated it!  Come on, this is Manos territory... surely DP is a *little* better?   

[Andrew]

I just remembered winning a copy of Manos: The Hands of Fate in last summer's proofreading challenge. 
Thanks Andrew!

A lot of people would find you thanking me for "Manos:  The Hands of Fate" to be a counter-intuitive reaction.  You are very welcome.

[Raffine]

All a matter of taste, of course:

"GOOD" DUMB

GALAXY INVADER 
Don Dohler's rednecks vs. alien epic.

PREYLIEN: ALIEN PREDATORS 
The Polonia Brothers salute to Don Dohler's favorite plot. Two dumb guys and a suicidal woman battle the goofiest collection of bad monster suits and puppets from the stars ever seen. The main "preylien" is a variation of Ro-Man from ROBOT MONSTER, but this time wearing a bright red vest. "EEEEEYOOP!"


"BAD" DUMB

SOUND OF THUNDER
TRON-like CGI and some of the stupidest and contrary-wise time travel "science" is featured in this adaptation of Ray Bradbury's excellent short story. The one dinosaur sequence is reused more times than the "Grumpy Attacks the Cave" sequence in Land of the Lost.

H.G. WELL'S THE WAR OF THE WORLDS (Tim Hines version)
Hines' mind and ass numbing loooong movie I guess gets some kudos for literally adapting Well's novel word-for-word, but all that walking and those proudly displayed terrible effects (it reminded me of the way my dad used to make everyone look at his heart surgery scar)  turned my mind to mush.  I bet a friend of mine, who's a big Wells fan, $5 that he couldn't make it all the way through it. I won. 

[Derf]

I have no real concept of time, so asking about the dumbest movie in the last year is a bit much for me. The dumbest movie I have watched recently is The Life Aquatic. I know there are fans of this movie on this board. If you like it, you like it. To me, it was like a comedy for people with no sense of humor but who like to think their sense of humor is so sophisticated that no one else could ever understand it. I did like the names of the sea creatures in the movie, and will admit that they were clever. But the movie itself seemed unable to make up its mind whether it was a comedy, a drama, a relationship piece, a cautionary tale, or whatever else. Yes, some will say, "It is all that and more: you just don't understand!" Okay, maybe I'm missing some grand subtlety (or is that an oxymoron?) in the movie, but it just struck me as boring and largely pointless.

[RCMerchant]

[quote author=Raffine link=topic=114234.msg144885#msg144885 date=1180187913

SOUND OF THUNDER
TRON-like CGI and some of the stupidest and contrary-wise time travel "science" is featured in this adaptation of Ray Bradbury's excellent short story. The one dinosaur sequence is reused more times than the "Grumpy Attacks the Cave" sequence in Land of the Lost.

[/quote]


     Heh,Heh!

[youtube=425,350] http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D6LZzVCpYDY

[Raffine]

I recently rewatched the first couple of seasons of Land of the Lost on DVD and was glad to see it actually holds up really well. The effects are fine, particularly for a 70's Saturday morning kid's show, and the the writing is surprisingly good, if a bit melodramatic sometimes. Several big name sci-fi writers contributed scripts, and the overall tone of the show was a lot darker than I remembered it.

Bonus! The commentaries by the people who played Will, Holly, and Chukka are hilarious! They sometimes rival prime MST3K.

[BTM]

I think one of the dumbest films I've sat through this year would be the film Hoot.  It's about a boy who moves to Florida where he meets a brother and sister who are trying to keep a land developer from making a new pancake house on the site where several rare owls keep their nests. 

There's just WAY too damn many things to say how contrived, cheap and manipulative this piece of drek is, gives a bad name to anything the term "family film."

For example The boy (not the main character, but the other one) spends all his time "out in the woods" (where is this kids parents?), and resorts to vandalism and other things to keep the innocent owls free from harm.  When the company representative (who, of course, is evil, as all people who run big corporations are) bring out some rottweillers to keep the construction site free of vandals at night, the boy responds by dumping a bag of rattlesnakes into the site.  And the rots, who are scared of snakes (huh?) won't stay at the site (or some such.)

Not gonna even start with how dumb THAT is.  Not to mention the fact what guarantee we have the snakes won't turn around and EAT the freaking owls? 

The movie's based on the young adult (childrens?) book of the same name, but I'm told the book is a lot better, with the characters not acting like cardboard cutouts.

[DodgingGrunge]

To me, [The Life Aquatic] was like a comedy for people with no sense of humor but who like to think their sense of humor is so sophisticated that no one else could ever understand it.

I call this the Jim Jarmusch Approach to Comedy, of which I am strongly in favor.  It is the kind of subtle strange-funny, extremely dry, where your facial muscles are tensed throughout, but you never quite laugh.  A lot of Luis Buñuel's French movies play this way as well.  Personally, I applaud directors that can pull it off.  It is really hard to to tell a two-hour joke with no actual punch line.  The experience of the viewer is, of course, emotionally draining so I completely sympathize with people like Derf that dislike it.  But I watch so many movies that engender no reaction from me whatsoever; I tend to enjoy experiences like this.

[Jack]

Dukes of Hazard comes to mind.  Lets make another Jackass movie, except with a Dodge Charger.

[Menard]

I bought a 10 DVD, 20 film, collection for under 6 bux (mentioned in another thread) with at least a few good flix.  I've already sat thru two good ones HORROR HOTEL aka CITY OF THE DEAD (1960) and MESSIAH OF EVIL aka DEAD PEOPLE (1973) -- the reason I bought the set.  I also sat thru DON'T LOOK IN THE BASEMENT (1973) which I had remembered more fondly than it deserves!

Messiah of Evil has to be one of the most solid sleep inducers it has ever been my displeasure to sleep through; I was out cold within 20 minutes.

Horror Hotel was a letdown for me. I think a part of that was the build-up before seeing the movie, as I had heard several good things about it, but it just did not live up to expectations. Not a bad film at all, and very atmospheric, but highly overrated, IMO.

I still enjoy Don't Look in the Basement. I find it to be a fun movie, but I can certainly see that it is not going to be everyone's cup of tea.



Bad/dumb exercises in futility over the past year:

Stephen King's Desperation - A made for TV movie that had me wondering if a 6 year-old wrote it. Is this Stephen King? I had no idea that a tube sock filled with fertilizer could blow up an entire mountain.

Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle - dumb...dumb...dumb...dumb...f$%king dumb. The worst of Power Rangers has more intelligent scripting, and better done stunts than this utter waste of a film.

Once Upon a Time in Mexico - Really need to have a long talk with the friend who recommended this. Completely apathetic characters, chaotic storyline, and poorly choreographed action sequences add up to...nothing. How could you go wrong with an all-star line-up like this? This is the answer to that question.

[Scott]

MESSIAH OF EVIL is a bad one Menard. What a bore and I put up with the likes of ATOMIC AGE VAMPIRE. Both boring bad.

I actually like HORROR HOTEL. Wouldn't mind seeing it again. Found the Trailer for anyone interested and this is another you can find cheap.

[youtube=425,350]http://youtube.com/watch?v=VF8PaKcJNWQ

DON'T LOOK IN THE BASEMENT is ultra low-budget, but it's ok. Worth a look and you can get a copy cheap.

As for Dumb films I've seen this year. Well.......I've seen alot of them. Might have to make a list and seperate them like Raffine did.

[Allhallowsday]

Messiah of Evil has to be one of the most solid sleep inducers it has ever been my displeasure to sleep through; I was out cold within 20 minutes.

Interestingly, my first pass at MESSIAH OF EVIL (which I remembered more fondly being called DEAD PEOPLE) did put me to sleep in about 20 minutes; however, my interest in re-watching this was for very fond memories of seeing it on a double bill about 30 years ago, and spooked by it then.  It's not a very good movie, but for me, it might as well be "background music" as it's all about atmosphere.   I like the eerie paintings in the father's studio, I like the creepy music, strange shots like the first woman walking thru the dark construction site, Elisha Cook Jr. at the beginning. 

Horror Hotel was a letdown for me. I think a part of that was the build-up before seeing the movie, as I had heard several good things about it, but it just did not live up to expectations. Not a bad film at all, and very atmospheric, but highly overrated, IMO.

I remember HORROR HOTEL (City of the Dead) from over 40 years ago, when my siblings and I found this quite enthralling.  The same night I put on MESSIAH, I put this disc on too.  I hadn't looked at it in decades, but though I woke up just as they were cutting the birthday cake...  I gave this one another try and found it acceptable, well remembered, but certainly creaky. 

I still enjoy Don't Look in the Basement. I find it to be a fun movie, but I can certainly see that it is not going to be everyone's cup of tea.

DON'T LOOK IN THE BASEMENT had been a staple of WPIX, channel 9 out of New York in the 70s, it might have been CHILLER, so I sat thru BASEMENT back then at least a few times.  It is, of course, completely implausible (that the old woman didn't die of shock and lack of medical attention for one thing!)  Z'okay. 

[Oldskool138]

It's Christopher Lee's birthday today!!!  85 years young...

Good to see him still making films.  You have Tim Burton thank for that.  He was semi-retired when Burton wanted him to play a judge in SLEEPY HOLLOW (1999).

Cheers, Mr. Lee!  Happy Birthday and hopefully many more to come!   

[hipsterical]

Everyone who watched "starcrash" knows how good italian filmmakers are when a really crappy movie is needed .

in my opinion the worst movie ever is "CYBORG, GUERRIERO D'ACCIAIO" ( something like "steel warrior") . it sucks so bad it is hard to believe and you can trust me. the "cyborg make-up kit" is more than the average bad movie enthusiast can take.

another pearl is "LA CROCE DALLE SETTE PIETRE" ("Seven-jewel cross", maybe ?)
i wont tell you much about this movie, it only tells the story of a werewolf who battles the camorra (mafia of Naples, ve've got galore of those) because they stole his precious talisman. it is a horror movie but most of the time you may believe it is a somewhat black comedy. the opening scene of a satanic orgy. i cried looking at the special effects.
look and die.

[Menard]

DON'T LOOK IN THE BASEMENT had been a staple of WPIX, channel 9 out of New York in the 70s, it might have been CHILLER, so I sat thru BASEMENT back then at least a few times.  It is, of course, completely implausible (that the old woman didn't die of shock and lack of medical attention for one thing!)  Z'okay. 

The entire premise of Don't Look is, as you said, completely implausible.

A doctor runs an asylum solo, with the only other keyholder to the place being a patient themselves. Of course, this is why we have a pretty blonde nurse show up and be befuddled by the insanity.

I had first seen this in the early 80s on a late, late show (they came on at 1:00 a.m.). It was a fun, very low budget, b-movie romp which, unfortunately, led the way for movies beginning with the word Don't.

The ultimate torture of the Don't movies to me was either Don't Go in the Woods or Don't Go in the House. They should have made a retrospective of the Don't movies themselves and called it Don't Go in the Theatre.