Good Romance Novels?

[Inyarear]

You know, I've been thinking maybe there ought to be a whole separate board for bad books. The trashy romance novels alone merit considerable mockery.

Anyway, to get back to the subject at hand...

With Valentine's Day coming up, I've been wanting to get my girlfriend a gift or two. Since the whole candy-and-flowers thing is so played, I was thinking maybe I should get her a romance novel. The trouble is, typical guy that I am, I don't read that genre of books much, and don't really know where to start. Maybe some of you experienced ladies on here can help me out, or for all I know, maybe even some of you guys.

To make matters even more difficult, though, the book in question has to meet a few rather exacting standards to be an appropriate gift, to wit:

 - My girlfriend is younger than I am, and therefore the novel really ought to have some age difference between the guy and the gal--doesn't have to be a lot, but there has to be some.

 - She's a devout Southern Baptist preacher's daughter and not too lacking in devotion to the faith herself, so books loaded with obscenity and blasphemy need not apply.

 - Moreover, if it's specifically targeted at a Christian audience, she might already have a copy and it might be so sanitized that it would bore her anyway, so let it be reverent of Christianity if that subject comes up, but not specifically targeted at it.

 - In keeping with that last point, sexual tension is fine--bring it on--but let there be no actual sex, unless within marriage. Even then, under absolutely no circumstances should it involve anything oral or anal. (I would NEVER ask her to do anything like that!)

 - My girlfriend is also very smart and mature for her age, so let this novel be smart and mature as well. If it MUST be for "Young Adults" at least let it be witty without being too cutesy.

 - Forbidden love is fine--in fact, for all the necessary conflict it provides to a story, I'd practically require the novel to have some--but let it be forbidden socially, not morally. In other words, no incest or exploitation, please.

 - Speaking of necessary conflict, it's fine--heck, it's splendid--if the story ends in a tragedy. Whatever happens to everyone, though, let the gal still be in love with the guy at the end. Tales of messy break-ups aren't exactly something you'd get for someone you wanted to stick with you, right?

Needless to say, my online searches for a book matching these specifications have yielded rather discouraging results. More often than not, it's a lot like walking into an "adult" bookstore and asking the guy behind the counter "Hey, have you got anything that's family-friendly? No, I don't mean incest..."

Anyone got any suggestions?

[ulthar]

Hmmm, you might have better luck looking for a novel that has a story with a romantic component, rather than specifically a "romance novel."  Of course, I cannot offer a concrete example (or at least one that fits all of your criteria).

What ones like Nicholas Sparks writes - do they fit the bill?  (base novels for THE NOTEBOOK and MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE).

Can't be of much more help...not my genre of reading material.   

[frank]

Just thinking of this because I have seen the movie mentioned in this forum somewhere:

"The princess bride" by William Goldman.

I liked the book more than the movie (surprise, surprise!), although the movie was good. In the book, I liked the narrative style. A father tells or reads the story to his child and the story itself is written normally, interspersed by remarks by the father (written in red in my copy), where he would say things like:"Here the author goes on about the beauty of the landscape and the like for several pages...we'll skip that". So this book would be perfect for people that think Lord of the Rings was good, but too long (if such people exist).

The story is, of course, the greatest love story ever told. There might be an age difference. No Christianity involved, I think. No obscenity, blasphemy, or actual sex ether, if I remember correctly. Alas, it is not what I consider a real romance novel, one needs to be interested in fantasy or fairy tales to enjoy this.

[dean]

I'd stray away from the romance novels altogether if you need to have alot of restrictions on what you can get.  Especially since the only good romance novels I've seen worth buying have Fabio on the cover and make allusions like 'entered her honey-filled cave' type moments.  That being said, the ones I have flicked over at bookstores and whatnot seem to be fairly tame, but probably better not to risk it.


My only thought was some non-fiction based on some sort of romance, but I can't think of any so it may not be a good path to go down.

[Derf]

Frank's suggestion might not be a bad one considering her taste in men  : If she is dating someone who loves bad movies, this book will help tie the two together. You might also try a classic like Wuthering Heights if she hasn't already read it. Yes, it's old, but it is a tremendously romantic story. It might not meet all your criteria, but it is a marvelous novel.

[threnody]

Hmmm, you might have better luck looking for a novel that has a story with a romantic component, rather than specifically a "romance novel."  Of course, I cannot offer a concrete example (or at least one that fits all of your criteria).

What ones like Nicholas Sparks writes - do they fit the bill?  (base novels for THE NOTEBOOK and MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE).

Can't be of much more help...not my genre of reading material.   

I think those ones have actual sex in them, if I can remember correctly. At least The Notebook did.

My recommendation: Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. It's completely safe and it's a classic. One of the best books I've ever read. I think pretty much every Jane Austen novel is like that. She said she made her characters so they always got all they ever wanted.

Also, does she like fantasy? Bram Stoker's Dracula is suprisingly very romantic, and I don't mean vampire-vampire or vampire-human romance. I mean completely human romance. It was beautiful.

[Killer Bees]

I think I have two books which fit your criteria.  But you didn't hear it from me, because I would never read such trash myself, nor would I find them interesting and heart fluttering in a way that would appeal to my hidden romantic soul.

Come Love A Stranger - Kathleen E. Woodiwiss
A Rose In Winter - Kathleen E. Woodiwiss

If I was to have such preferences in this genre, I would say that the second book is my favourite.

Of course, I have no such preference, seeing as how I don't read stuff like that.   

[Inyarear]

Just as I thought, the best advice on this thread came from our women. No offense, guys, but the gals have the upper hand over us on these things; it seems you fellows know just as much about romance novels as I do.

As a matter of fact, I have a copy of both the novel and the movie for Princess Bride and I've been meaning to read the book, but somehow I never quite got around to it. It doesn't quite seem like what I'm looking for anyway and if it's anything like the movie, a few elements of it would tend to spoil the intended effect. Specifically, the movie has Ralph Savage abusing our Lord and Savior's name at least once (MUST they do that in every Hollywood movie?) and also there's one scene that might come off as a tad irreverent:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sbqv3MwwVd8
	Small | Large

Within context, of course, that's not so unfriendly to Christianity. Really, the bishop was even kind of helping Buttercup out there by prolonging his sermon so much, but still...

Yes, Threnody, I suppose my girlfriend might like some fantasy elements. If it fit a few more of my criteria, I would get her a novelization of the romantic movie Kate & Leopold (featuring time travel). The main policy on this point is that the romance itself must be fairly realistic, whether the rest of the story is fantastic or not. In real life, there are happy romances and happy marriages, but no perfect romances or perfect marriages. Also, real people can have happy times and die well and go to Heaven, but no one just lives "happily ever after."

Essentially, the requirement here is that the happy couple be as human as any of us, even if one or both of them does happen to be immortal, or a werewolf, or some such. No flawless gods or archetypal cardboard cutouts need apply. I don't want my girlfriend getting infatuated with or (more likely) repulsed by too much perfection.

I know the Dracula novel was about a lot more than just the hunting of the vampire, but it's always struck me as being more of a guy novel than a girl novel, even if it does have that great romantic subplot in it. I'll read that for myself, but something more feminine is definitely called for in my girlfriend's case.

As for the classics... they are generally very well-written and very morally clean (except for maybe stuff by D.H. Lawrence). It's just too bad I haven't been able to come up with any that dealt more with conflicts over age differences, since a lot of our ancestors apparently had no objection to letting their daughters court and marry at rather early ages. To find any conflict over that, you basically have to get into the twentieth century, and then Nabokov's Lolita takes things entirely too far in the other direction.

Nothing to be ashamed of, Killer Bees. Did I ever mention that I still read Marvel's Spider-girl comic books at my age? I also got one of my favorite Christian authors to admit to the audience at a writing seminar I was attending that he reads Hardy Boys novels...

I've had a peek at some excerpts from those Woodiwiss novels you recommended and I agree that A Rose In Winter is probably the better one. What I've seen of Come Love A Stranger, to tell the truth, reminds me a bit of one of Snoopy's hilariously cliched potboilers in the old Peanuts strips. (At the end of that strip, he hands the manuscript over to Lucy to read, she points out one of the plot holes in it, and then he hits her over the head with his typewriter.)

I'm definitely going to try getting a complete copy of A Rose In Winter to read, as it seems to be a close match to what I'm seeking. We may just have a winner here. Thanks for the tip!

[Zapranoth]

There aren't any.

Next!

[Killer Bees]

You're very welcome, Inyarear.

As an independant, capable, financially stable, modern woman, people still look at you with undisguised horror if you say you enjoy books like that. But the ones I mentioned are pretty modern, even though they are set a few hundred years ago.

And I found out, to my dismay, that Ms Woodiwiss died not long ago, maybe 12 months?  She was only 68 or so, but was quite ill, although how I'm not sure.

[Dennis]

If your girl friend is willing to try science fiction I recomend "Love, Not Human". It's a collection of short stories by Gordon R. Dickson that deal with various aspects of love and affection. As I recall there is no actual sex in the stories. They are well written and thought provoking, I enjoyed them enough to give my copy to our recepsionist, took a lot of teasing from my male co-workers about my choice of reading materials. She, on the other hand married her boyfriend about 2 months later.

 

[316zombie]

well,i'm one of the ladies,and i HAVE to ask about your online name?a bit kinky,maybe?i ASSUME you are more that 15 years older than she is?or,at least,that's how i am reading"between the lines"of your posts?and,btw,if she's your girlfriend,have you ever looked at her books,or asked her what she likes to read?she might just surprise you,lol!
but in the meantime,DEFINITELY princess bride!!
are you looking for this book as a way of proposing,perhaps?if so,try this movie instead,it's called"beyond tomorrow",lovely little romance,with a poignant tragedy....and a good ending!

[threnody]

...if she's your girlfriend,have you ever looked at her books,or asked her what she likes to read?she might just surprise you,lol!

My Catholic cousin is very strict and proper, but she secretly reads smut like there's no tomorrow, bwahaha.

[Inyarear]

well,i'm one of the ladies,and i HAVE to ask about your online name?a bit kinky,maybe?

Er, not as kinky as you think. You see, I based the name on a private musing of mine while looking back at some Silver Age comics. In one particular Fantastic Four comic, the Human Torch was always telling the Sub-Mariner to "Stick it in your pointy little ear!" or "I'll throw you out on your pointy little ear!" It got me thinking about how people had come to threaten each other about doing things to that particular part of the anatomy.

The way I figure it, some usually mild-mannered fellow was irate and telling off one of his drinking buddies with a bit of sanitized vulgarity ("Yeah, stick it in ya rear, pal!") when his tenderly raised child or some such happened to walk in. To avoid setting a bad example, I figure he used the resemblance in sound to pass his insult off to his kid as something milder yet. ("No you didn't hear me right. I said 'Yeah, stick it in yar ear, pal!'")

Me, I've got some really strong opinions myself, especially concerning politics and religion, but I'm always trying to hold back on the nasty language I feel like spouting about them. Hence, my naming pun reflects this bit of personalized sanitizing I'm certain took place sometime back during WWII as an ideal to which I aspire.

And--oh yeah--a lot of times, when I'm talking to certain obnoxious people, I do sometimes wish they'd jam their ill-considered insults against my beliefs into either or both of those parts of their anatomy. So the name reflects that too.

i ASSUME you are more that 15 years older than she is?or,at least,that's how i am reading"between the lines"of your posts?

You'd be assuming wrong; it's not THAT great. (If it were, she'd barely be old enough to bleed yet! I'm not that kind of guy.) There is some substantial age difference, though. It's best to cover the range of subjects here.

and,btw,if she's your girlfriend,have you ever looked at her books,or asked her what she likes to read?she might just surprise you,lol!

She might, but I don't think so. It's not as if she's incredibly morally strict or anything, but she has absorbed her parents' teachings well, and I tend to agree with those beliefs myself; sexual purity is really important. At the same time, I happen to think a lot of our churches have severely neglected the importance of marital eroticism this last century or so. There was a time when a devout young Christian fellow actually considered it his moral duty to write some erotic poetry about his wedding day, specifically how he wished the wedding would be over already so he could get busy with his wife. We could all benefit from some more of that kind of theology.

but in the meantime,DEFINITELY princess bride!!

Pass. It's probably a pretty good book, but even if it's not too objectionable, I doubt it could do very much to get her blood pumping, if you know what I mean.

are you looking for this book as a way of proposing,perhaps?

Not so much. I hope I didn't give you guys the wrong impression here: I'm only just getting to know her!

if so,try this movie instead,it's called"beyond tomorrow",lovely little romance,with a poignant tragedy....and a good ending!

Date movies are nice, but even the most romantic movies are nowhere near so powerful as some really first-rate erotic writing. Case in point: I just got finished reading a full copy of A Rose In Winter last night, and I can honestly say that is some of the hottest stuff I've ever read! I'm definitely going to get that for my girlfriend.

Feel free to keep the suggestions coming: I wouldn't hesitate to have another gift handy for these occasions if it's anywhere as good as this novel, and of course my girlfriend's got a birthday later in the year too...

Hmmm... Interesting suggestion about the science fiction, Dennis. It might not quite fit this occasion, but I'll certainly look into it and keep it in mind for another time. Science fiction generally is to girls what fantasy is to guys: readable under the right circumstances, but not necessarily their first choice at the bookstore. I'll have to see how she likes this gift first.

Of course, I was hoping to introduce my girlfriend to anime eventually, too. Onegai Teacher was possibly one of the best treatments of the common boys' "Hot For Teacher" fantasy I've ever seen. It's just too bad the animators didn't follow that up with a series featuring the girls' version of that fantasy. If it dealt with the subject as morally and tastefully as Onegai Teacher did, I'd give my girlfriend that in a heartbeat.

[316zombie]

i meant no insult....sorry!