Shark Attack 3: Megalodon

[Andrew]

A prehistoric shark appears in the ocean off the coast of Mexico.  It eats people.  How do you kill a fifty-ton shark that should be, but most emphatically is not, extinct?

Click here to go to the Review

[onagro]

It's simply amazing that the mama shark didn't die of costipation!  Who knows what eating a fully functional jet ski does to something's insides!

I think you forgot to mention the absolute worse pick-up line in the history of mankind was used in this movie. 
"But you know I'm really wired. What do you say I... take you home and eat your censored

[richjr37]

Best Bad Movie EVER! That line is freaking hilarious. Hard to believe the guy who plays Captain Jack Harkness on "Torchwood/Dr. Who" would agree to be in crap like this. He's come a long way.

[Jay the Magnificent]

First saw this on Sci fi Channel,     surprise...surprise.

Even at that, the straight to dvdness and bad bad "special effects" was cause for notice.

I let my expectations get too high i guess 

[pfyre]

you completely missed commenting on the absolute funniest non-sequitor line of all time - when Ben and Cat are by the truck and Chuck has just left them - Ben says "I'm kinda wired. What do you say we go back to your place and I eat your p***y?"  -- seemed that John Barrowman [now of 'Doctor Who'/'Torchwood' fame as Captain Jack Harkness  -- at the time an actor struggling to make ends meet who took the job cause it paid] had been asked by the director to ad lib something to get a reaction from the plank of wood who was his costar [apologies to planks of wood who no doubt have more acting ability] - so John ad libbed the line - and she still really didn't react - and John thought well that was that - they'd of course never use that take  -- ummm... guess again - in the DVD the line is there completely intact  - when broadcast on SciFi Channel the line has been dubbed over to "I'm kind of wired. What do you say we go back to your place and watch 'I Love Lucy'?" 

[Andrew]

I think you forgot to mention the absolute worse pick-up line in the history of mankind was used in this movie. 
"But you know I'm really wired. What do you say I... take you home and eat your censored

Not true, but I did intentionally omit directly addressing it and instead described Ben in the Characters section thusly:
"Ben Carpenter - Women love him for his spontaneous, romantic nature."

That line just comes out of nowhere, which makes it hilariously funny the first time anyone watches the film.

[Psycho Circus]

Oh Lordy, is this film bad! I kinda have a soft spot for anything containing ridiculously large sharks tho'. This is somehow worse than the "Megalodon" film and even dare I say, "Shark Zone"  Really funny seeing Barrowman in this too, I think I prefer this to the weird Torchwood and crappy new Dr. Who stuff.

I'm crying out for a decent shark flick, that has a specially made shark and not a CGI/stock mash-up. Deep Blue Sea blew big-time, so there's not been anything decent since Jaws 3-D and that sucked too. 

-Great review Andrew, as expected. 

[InformationGeek]

Ah, man, what's up with this horrible movie!?  I just saw the clip from this film, that's got to be worse special effects I have ever seen!!  I can't stand it...

[Undead]

Ben: "Larger than a Greyhound bus!"

Ahh, yes. But is it bigger than a Battleship? 


Hee hee... sorry, as you can tell from my chosen avatar there may have been some lasting damage from my having been exposed to The Giant Claw.

[Rattrap007]

The shark eating the boat/life raft/jet ski/etc is the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. I saw this on Sci-fi channel and still remember that stupid effect. God I love bad movies like this.

[ElaineC]

Sadly, the thing that stood out the most for me is that they had the paleontologist drinking Shasta, when in real life she (or most other scientists I have known) would have been sucking down the booze.  Simple rule of thumb: caffeine for computer programmers, alcohol for everyone else.

[BTM]

I've got a really DUMB question... was there ever a Shark Attack One and Two?

Just curious...

[Trevor]

I've got a really DUMB question... was there ever a Shark Attack One and Two?

Just curious...

Not a dumb question at all, BTM: there was (or should that be were?) a Shark Attack 1 and Shark Attack 2: both very lowwwww budget versions of Deep Blue Sea, they were made in South Africa. When the company that made them got chased out of South Africa by angry creditors, they made Europe (and specifically Barrandov Studios in Bulgaria) their base and made this film there.

Virtual karma to Andrew for the great review!!! 

[Trevor]

Ah, man, what's up with this horrible movie!?  I just saw the clip from this film, that's got to be worse special effects I have ever seen!!  I can't stand it...

Karma for the laugh you just gave me: the film's producers have a reputation for badness where I come from. 

[Jack]

One of my favorite things was the dubbing.  Or at least I assume it was bad dubbing, or maybe they just hired people with speech impediments?  The big corporate boss would put an awkward pause after ever fourth word or so, but there was another guy in the beginning during the shark attack sequence.  And yet another, the janitor who asked the main chick if she wanted a sandwich or something.  Also enjoyed the 20 or so shots of the throttle on the boat being pushed all the way forward, especially since it was obvious that the boat was standing still most of the time