Colonoscopy tomorrow

[trekgeezer]

I am having it done at noon tomorrow. Just a regular screening I've been putting off for a couple of years.

Everyone I talk to that's had one says it's a snap, you go in they knock you out do their thing and you wake up in recovery none the wiser.

The hard part is what I'm doing today, the clean out.  There are three different ways to choose from, two involving drinking a lot of foul tasting liquid and one involving pills.

I chose the pills which have a drawback,  you must have nothing to eat for 24 hours and can only have clear liquids. 

I got up this morning and had lemon jello and black coffee for breakfast (both allowed on the clear liquid diet), then I had to take 4 of these horse pills (with a full glass of water)every 15 minutes for an hour (they went to work very quickly).  Then I have to intake at least 8 oz of clear liquid every hour until 6:00 PM when I have to take 4 pills every 15 minutes for half an hour.

Right now my ass feels like it's been through a grinder, my stomach is groaning  and I still have about 20 more hours before I have to be at the  clinic and probably two more after that before I get to eat anything.

Say a prayer for me guys.   

[Patient7]

Good luck having a camera shoved up you rear. 

[Menard]

You do of course realize that we are hoping the best for you...

...so that, when it's over, we can make fun of you in the end?


The colonoscopy doesn't sound as harrowing as the preparation for it.

Hopefully everything is okay with you. I always say that we'd all live to a hundred if it weren't for doctors claiming stuff is wrong with us...

...then treating us for it.

[Patient7]

Good luck having a camera shoved up you rear. 

In all seriousness my dad had a colonoscopy not too long ago and for him the preparation was worse than the event so don't worry.  I can't really see what can go wrong except that the camera might break off.    Good Luck.

[Rev. Powell]

Cap'n, I admire you for being so frank about this important medical procedure and not worrying about becoming the butt of jokes.

[Mr. DS]

Happy prepping and have a successfull surgery 

[Andrew]

I hope that they find out "the coast is clear." 

A funny thing about hunger is that the pains go away after a while.  After that it's either a vague feeling of wanting to eat, or else a strange high that probably comes from your body consuming itself to keep you running.

[ghouck]

Post photos if you get 'em 

[Mr. DS]

Post photos if you get 'em 

Awesome idea if I may say so.   

[Ash]

My stepdad had a colonoscopy not too long ago and they did give him a picture.  Several pictures, in fact.
When he got home he handed me a manila envelope and said, "Open it."
I pulled out a large sheet that had several color pics of the inside of his colon.

GROSS!!!  

[Derf]

Kinda gives new meaning to "Going where no man has gone before..."

At least as far as we know. 

Seriously, though, good luck.

[Mr. DS]

If the prep isn't adequate there will be Klingons in the colon. 

[ghouck]

Q. How is a piece of toilet paper like the starship Enterprise?

A. They both circle Uranus in search of Klingons.

[Zapranoth]

A good test to have done.

Golytely tastes like brine -- it's awful, yes.  When I was a med student doing my first ICU rotation, a nurse asked me if I'd ever tasted it.   I had to take her up on that.  It tastes basically like what you get if you scoop some brine out of the sea from a dock. 

Happy osmotic catharsis.  =)

[Menard]

Hey Geeze,

Did you know that I added image hosting to my site?

I wanted to take a moment to test it out to see that it works okay...









Looks good so far...





Just a few more to go...





Working like a charm...





Boy...this image hosting script has quite an appetite...





Well...that ought to finish it up. Thank you for your assistance.