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Manos, the Hands of Fate

Started by The Burgomaster, January 15, 2004, 05:43:05 PM

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The Burgomaster

This movie has already been discussed in numerous threads, but I FINALLY bought the DVD (the Alpha version, not the MST3K version) and watched it last night.  All I can say is . . . huh?

After about 20 minutes, I asked myself, "If I had the opportunity to make a movie, no matter how small my budget was, would I make THIS movie?"

I've seen some bad movies in my life, but this one wins the award for "most shots of actors staring blankly at one another, or staring off into space, without moving or talking."  It also wins the award for "most meaningless close-ups."  I mean, for no reason, the editor kept inserting close-ups that had nothing to do with the scene.  For instance, the husband and wife will be talking, and then the film cuts to a close-up of their daughter for about 15 seconds (during which, you don't hear the conversation anymore), and then it jumps back to the medium shot of the husband and wife talking again.

I can't wait to watch it again.

"Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me the hell alone."

Scott

Burgomaster wrote

>I can't wait to watch it again.

Your a sick sick man Burgomaster. Rough viewing, but I love the opening scene with conversation and singing in the family car. That doorman character with the limp was the worst. Glad I was able to see it though. I'm sure not many people haven't seen this film. Well, I also bought the original version from Alpha DVD. You need to watch this one with someone to get more fun from it.

One day I'd like to catch all the Mystery Theater episodes/versions.


I luv dolma

I got the DVD as a gift (I had never seen it uncut) and sat down to watch Manos knowing it was ranked #1 of the worst films on imdb.com (at the time, before Gigli) and was in for a shock. There is nothing I can say that you haven't already heard about the movie.


& Hired, part 2 (what happened to part 1?) was hilarious. I was acctually crying in laughter during that one, like Prince of Space.



"By the way, you have the biggest dick, I have ever seen on a man!" ~Bruce Lee's son.

Brother Ragnarok

Damn right, Burgo!  Finally someone else agrees with me!  Viva la Manos!
(By the way, Torgo has a limp because he's supposed to be a mutant goat-boy satyr thing, which explains the "huge knees" bit, they're actually just triple jointed like a goat's)

Brother R

There are only two important things in life - monsters and hot chicks.
    - Rob Zombie
Rape is just cause for murdering.
    - Strapping Young Lad

Scott

Thanks for sharing that Brother Ragnarok. : ) I think. Either way it's rough viewing, but with films like this. It kinda makes me feel like a black belt for something.


Chopper

this was even a hard one for MST to save for me. i remember there were a lot of pointless shots of the road from the car moving (?). my friend and i were like "what is this s**t a tourist video for the desert!"

Jon

The reason why there were so many jump cuts in this movie is that the camera could only hold about 30 seconds of film.  Even with the MST treatment it's hardly watchable.  (Dr. Forester and TV's Frank both aplogized for it. :)

Toxie

Want to know something creepy?  The guy who played Torgo actually killed himself the same year this movie was made.  I read about on the Internet movie database.

Tars

I saw the un-MST3K version (I think I have a copy somewhere).  I didn't think it was utterly terrible.  That judgement was rendered after massive amounts of alcohol, though.

Prof. Dr. Bergman

Yes it's Manos.  I know of the horrors of this film (and I mean the film itself.)  I actually showed this film to a good friend of mine who asked me to "do my worst."  Needless to say, he wanted to pummel me to death shortly afterwards.  This is definately in my most despised films.  Atleast "Orgy of the Dead" had nudity, this stinkberger just plain sucked.  Kudos for having the courage to watch this waste of celluliod.

Karin

The scariest thing about "Manos, The Hands of Fate", is that after seeing it a few times (yes, the MST3K version), I realized that I KNEW someone in the movie!!!!  I have been on stage (community theatre, that is) with one of the policemen!!!!  Yeah, that's a scare fest all its own!!!!!

Steve B

We all know now how Frank Zappa came to be...he was The Master!!!

Dr. Maniac

    The guy who wrote, directed and starred in this movie actually had a day job.  He was a fertiliser salesman.  You heard me!  That alone should be warning enough but if you absolutely MUST see a contender for the worst film ever, here it is.  They must have though a hunchbacked servant was too cliche so they gave Torgo a speech impediment and knees the size of footballs, you could escape from this guy if you were on cruthces and yet NO ONE seems to be able to escape from the ramshackle-cabin-of-Doom.
  Yes, I have this one on video.  Whenever I have a party and it is 3 in the morning and the guests are all drunk and I want them to go home I put it on.  It clears the house in a matter of minutes!  Hasn't failed yet!

Tygge Whitlin

This is proof that Ed Wood was not the worst director ever.

LauraMT

"HANDS, the HANDS OF FATE" (MST version) is a favorite in my twisted household.  Where can I buy the soundtrack -- with the squabbling wives' music and the "haunting Torgo theme"?