Descriptions of Bad Movies that don't exist

[indianasmith]

This movie was the product of a barroom bet between Ed Wood and the Polonia brothers as to who could make a worse film . . .

[zombie no.one]

"A fairly enjoyable horror, although some may feel there is too much focus on the killer's addiction to Uncle Ben's Boil-In-The-Bag Rice."

[LilCerberus]

For a horror/thriller, the most intense scene involves a skunk.

[ER]

Taylor Swift, as the woman of a thousand faces.....

[lester1/2jr]

made for tv movie circa 1979 about PCP starring Ron Palillo and Jaclyn Smith as his concerned guidance counselor. Only aired once and since then very hard to find 5/5

[Dr. Whom]

This is basically Jaws, but with penguins.

[ER]

In a 1990 made-for-TV movie, Pamela Anderson goes for a checkup at Dr. Cliff Huxtable's office, then wakes up after experiencing lost time. Nine months later she gives birth to a half-black baby who loves Jello pudding.

[Alex]

I understood everything, save for perhaps the obsession with fish butts.

[lester1/2jr]

This is basically Jaws, but with penguins.

I'm actually surprised they haven't done that.

[chainsaw midget]

If you're looking for a good old fashioned nature-gone-amuck killer animal in the woods movie ... go watch something else.  The "evil bear" is shown far less than the lead characters country music singing (and frankly is far less  horrific.)

[ER]

The last Shaker inherits the sect's property and builds a casino. The mob moves in and mayhem ensues, in Martin Scorsese's mercifully final film, noteworthy for De Niro's  performance while playing a hitman who uses a walker to get around.

[M.10rda]

The last Shaker inherits the sect's property and builds a casino. The mob moves in and mayhem ensues, in Martin Scorsese's mercifully final film, noteworthy for De Niro's  performance while playing a hitman who uses a walker to get around.

It picks up directly where THE IRISHMAN left off?

[M.10rda]

Okay, I'll try one:

...Only filmgoers with the most sturdy constitutions are advised to brave the extended fantasy sequence in which Laurence R. Harvey (THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE 2) lovingly shaves and tongue-bathes Troma's favorite fatman Joe Fleishaker...

[indianasmith]

HIPPOS OF THE CORN features the most perfect conjunction of country western music, Mongolian folk dancing, and dwarf dismemberment ever recorded on film!

[Dr. Whom]

A bold attempt at turning the Voynich Manuscript into a movie.