Things I've Learned from Anime

[AndyC]

Was about to post this to "Things I've Learned from Cartoons" and figured maybe it should have its own thread.


A gigantic, heavily-armed humanoid flying robot has roughly the same controls as a Bobcat loader.

Anyone can pilot a gigantic, heavily-armed humanoid flying robot without any prior training, provided he's sufficiently gifted.

It's important to cram as many weapons as possible into your robot, even if any one of them seems sufficient.

High-tech weapons only work if you shout their names really loud.

It is bad etiquette to use your best weapon before you've almost gotten yourself killed using the less effective ones.

Women's necks are twice as long and half as thick as men's.

Japanese people have big, round eyes.

Human hair is a solid object that comes in as many colours as house paint.

There are two species of human beings living together on Earth: the tall and good-looking, and the short and cartoonish. The latter are more prone to eccentric behaviour.

It's perfectly all right to send kids out to fight aliens.

Aliens and monsters want to have their way with our women.

[Doggett]

Short skirts are a must have !

[InformationGeek]

The people in charge of the afterlife carry very cool swords.

Ninjas do not look like ninjas.

Depending on what fruit you eat, you can gain certian superpowers.

The navy controls a lot of the world.

When powering up, you grow large muscles and spikey hair.

It is possible for a 10 year old from Wales to teach English to a Junior High All Girl School.

The mafia is full of immortals.

People die if their names are written in a notebook.

Never trust the cute, perky, and happy girls.  They are secretly insane.

All shy and timid girls have dark black or purple hair.

[akiratubo]

Men's noses bleed uncontrollably when they are sexually aroused.

Teenage boys flee in terror when attractive women proposition them.

Just before they die, evil people are given to making speeches about how their fathers didn't love them.

Most heroes will listen to these speeches and suddenly feel bad about killing the evil person, even though the evil guy wiped out his entire family/race/planet/whatever.

The mightiest of armies can be defeated by singing a song.

The youngest female member of any particular group will be the most heavily sexualized, which will be even more disturbing because her propensity for bouncing on men's laps, flashing her undies, or deep-throating phallic foods will be presented as evidence of her innocence and cuteness.

[Doggett]

Tenticles will do horrible things to you...

[Jim H]

People are really, really, really, really tough.  In fact, many people are almost impossible to kill.

[oxode]

Was about to post this to "Things I've Learned from Cartoons" and figured maybe it should have its own thread.


It's perfectly all right to send kids out to fight aliens.

Is there an other reason to have'em ?

[InformationGeek]

Was about to post this to "Things I've Learned from Cartoons" and figured maybe it should have its own thread.


It's perfectly all right to send kids out to fight aliens.

Is there an other reason to have'em ?

Sure!  They can fight against evil organizations!  Learned that through the anime and game version of Pokemon!

[Flick James]

I'm training my kids to fight WalMart.

[oxode]

The mightiest of armies can be defeated by singing a song.

You talk about Barry Manilow ?

What I learned:

Spectacles enhance intellect.

Gun sights are totally superfluent.

You can carry enormous amounts of weapons and ammo in Your suit and it wont even bulge.

The human body contains more than 10 gallons of blood - naturally under very high pressure.

Every woman/girl gets hot when raped.

Gods, angels, saints -even buddhistic- tend to be armed and violent.

Every vehicle -even bicycles- explode on collision.

Human body parts are only loosely attached - so be carefull!

Every good guy/girl is a expert shot and martial arts crack.

Unnamed bad henchmen should have good insurances.

You don't have to work to have allways money.

[oxode]

I'm training my kids to fight WalMart.

I'd count that as evil organization.

[oxode]

Ehm and . . . oh yes, thanks for this thread Andy!

A bit away of it, but it might fit a little:
Has anybody an idea why Popey never has a canopener on him?

[retrorussell]

Perverted behavior by men is always allowed.  The offended female may deliver a knuckle sandwich but no one else minds.

Japanese women in anime are the exact opposite of their human counterparts: large breasts, big eyes, and multiple hues of hair color.

When showing any strong emotion, the size of eyes/mouth/bodily proportions know no bounds whatsoever.

It's okay to look up a girl's skirt/at her panties; in fact, the camera angle often encourages this.

Hair is really, really shiny.

[SynapticBoomstick]

Human mouths and stomachs can accept and hold absurd amounts of food.

A terrible event triggers jagged lines in reality which can be sensed by people a great distance away.

Shocked people cause the air around them to manifest in dark streaks.

Sweat is produced from a single large pore on the side of the head.

There's a good chance that your neighbor is a vampire/space alien/demi-god/secret agent/musical genius.

People can't tell the difference between your secret identity and your real one, even if you don't wear a mask.

When transforming, your enemies are obligated to let you scream, twirl, flex, or otherwise act out the action.

Anthropomorphic animals are perfectly normal in human towns. They can even hold office.

[WingedSerpent]

Proper Martial arts techniques included loudly announcing the name of the move and/or fighting style, as long as you are properly powered up.

Thanks to emotions, the human body will expand, contract, or otherwise distort when yelling.