Movies you wish people had warned you about first

[Trevor]

For me, it's Alien Predator aka The Falling: all I can say is YIKES. 

[retrorussell]

ALEN: RESURRECTION.  I actually paid money at the theater for this, good God it's awful!
I had heard no scathing reviews about MIDNIGHT, which I fortunately did NOT see at the theater.  I do, however, regret the money spent for a rental.

[ChaosTheory]

OASIS OF THE ZOMBIES - I'm still baffled as to how a movie could wreck a good premise so badly.
R.O.T.O.R. - seriously, whut the whut?
UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: REGENERATION - I was in no way prepared for that degree of awesome from a straight-to-video sequel 

[The Burgomaster]

A FORCE OF ONE.  I'll never forget the saturation advertising campaign they had on TV.  One of our local independent TV stations played the TV teasers at least 6 times an hour (and I'm not kidding).  One of my friends from school told me it was "awesome" and he had already seen it 2 or 3 times.  So, off I went to the drive-in with my parents and sisters to see it as part of a double feature with THE OCTAGON (which looked like a classic compared to A FORCE OF ONE).  Yeeesh.

Here is one of the teasers they used to show on TV:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgLPlSL62ZA

[voltron]

Oh that's easy. Scream (1981), no question. The less said about that pile of poop the better. 

[tracy]

"Going Ape" with Tony Danza....one of the worst movies ever commited to film. I'm convinced that I lost IQ points with that piece of garbage.

[Mofo Rising]

Well, I don't know. There's a lot to be said for experiencing the worst movies ever made completely unprepared.

I remember it very clearly that I held a party where we were all going to watch stupid movies. I remember having a copy of The Wrong Guys handy. If you had HBO as a kid in the '80s, you watched it. Louie Anderson, Cub Scouts, you get the idea. We started watching this movie and unanimously decided that is was awful and shouldn't continue.

It's replacement was Slapstick (Of Another Kind).

Let me link that: Slapstick (Of Another Kind)

I am not exaggerating in the slightest, Slapstick is the worst movie I have ever seen. If you think it would be fun to make your friends watch a terrible movie, you have not seen Slapstick. I'm lucky they did not murder me.

Terrible movie night never happened again.

[Bushma]

Paranormal Activity

Yet another film based on "found footage" where nothing happens for 95% of the film. I watched this in theaters and was insanely bored. I actually like Asylum's "Paranormal Entity" better!

[claws]

Fiend (1980). It was the early 80s and my mom and me pretty much rented anything at the video store that looked like a horror film. I believe Fiend was one of our first really bad movie rentals. It sucked so hard we both still complained about the movie weeks after.

[JPickettIII]

OASIS OF THE ZOMBIES - I'm still baffled as to how a movie could wreck a good premise so badly.
R.O.T.O.R. - seriously, whut the whut?
UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: REGENERATION - I was in no way prepared for that degree of awesome from a straightforward sequel 

These movies I personally enjoyed.  Especially R.O.T.O.R.  Universal Soldier: Regeneration was a little bad.  I would recommend any of these  .

[Archivist]

The Butterfly Effect (2004) - the last time I have ever paid retail for a DVD.  What a depressing and utterly pointless waste of a time travel movie.  Ugh.

Live By The Fist - ultra low budget kickboxing-in-foreign-prison movie with Jerry Trimble.  No wonder it was in the bottom of the bargain bin at the local DVD shop.

[voltron]

Black Christmas (2006)

[akiratubo]

Eaten Alive (1977)

I remember seeing the box for this movie at many stores during the VHS era.  I was always curious about it but never rented it.  Even the internet was mostly mum about this movie except to say that it had the same director as The Texas Chain Saw Massacre but wasn't as good.

That is an understatement.  The movie is nothing but a red-tinted headache that seems to be trying to poke fun at someone's idea of redneck stereotypes.  The script trots out Kmart Kowboys, insane old racist men, domestic violence, hookers, drug use, and cruelty to animals and children.  With all that going for it, it STILL can't make any sort of impact, except maybe an impact on your patience.  Tobe Hooper's direction is on the level of "point the camera that way".  Neville Brand, as the villain, clearly wishes he were anywhere (maybe even dead) but in the movie.  Robert Englund makes an appearance.  He tries, bless him, so I'd be tempted to call him the one bright spot in the movie ... if he didn't completely suck.  This is, bar none, the worst performance of his career.  I'm actually surprised he was ever allowed to be in another movie after this.  (Incidentally, Robert's first line of dialogue was stolen by Quentin Tarantino for use in Kill Bill, which makes me hate Eaten Alive even more for inspiring Tarantino in even the slightest way to make that godawful pile of crap.)

The only good thing about Eaten Alive is that it comes from a time when filmmakers knew how to make true sleaze.  It freaking starts with a closeup on a guy unbuttoning his belt and unzipping his pants while telling a crying hooker about how he's going to butt-rape her, for crying out loud!  And all of it is played completely straight with no sort of craft or artistry at all.  It's like someone just happened to have a camera rolling in a brothel while this was going down.  Anyway, that's the first five minutes.  You can safely quit watching after that, as the movie has already shown you the best it has.

I needed some Advil and a stiff drink after this one.  DEFINITELY a movie I wish someone had warned me about.

[retrorussell]

For fans of eccentric performances there is definitely something to enjoy in EATEN ALIVE.  Neville Brand and the husband of Marilyn Burns' character are especially nutty.  Otherwise, yeah; it's no great shakes other than a couple good gore scenes.  I remember it was my first ever dvd rental.

[Umaril Has Returned]

Fiend (1980). It was the early 80s and my mom and me pretty much rented anything at the video store that looked like a horror film. I believe Fiend was one of our first really bad movie rentals. It sucked so hard we both still complained about the movie weeks after.

I thought so too, even after reading all that great stuff about it in Famous Monsters magazine. While speaking of bad movies, another film that would have been a great double bill with Fiend would have been The Alien Factor which was just as bad or worse as Fiend. And like the other one, it too was featured on the cover of Famous Monsters!