Wish Corruption Game

[Allhallowsday]

Granted, but he eats your entire family and uses your bedroom for a litterbox.

I wish that Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton had settled the election in a steel cage death match.

Granted; but whoever won we're still up sch!tz creek without a paddle... 

I wish that everybody agreed. 

[Alex]

Granted, but no one will tell you what it is that they all agreed on.

I wish my numbers would come up so I could win a stupidly large amount of money and retire to a private island which I could outfit as my evil lair.

[Pacman000]

Granted, but you forgot to follow the Evil Overlord List http://www.worldconquer.org/evil_overlord.html, & wind up in super villain prison.

I wish someone would clean my room.

[ER]

Granted, but you forgot to follow the Evil Overlord List http://www.worldconquer.org/evil_overlord.html, & wind up in super villain prison.

I wish someone would clean my room.

Done! But alas they discover all the love letters you wrote to Kanye West's housekeeper.

I wish The Walking Dead would bring Don Knotts back as a zombie.

[Pacman000]

Granted! But he starts singing as soon as he comes on screen.

I wish I'd burned those letters.

[indianasmith]

Granted, but the author made copies and gave them to THE ENQUIRER.

I wish my toenails weren't so ugly.

[javakoala]

Granted, but a collector of rarities falls in love with your feet and has them cut off to add to her collection.

I wish I knew what I wanted for dinner.

[cqmorrell]

Granted, but it'll be a three hour round trip to get what you want.

I wish I could just forget the bad stuff that's happened in the past.

[Rev. Powell]

Granted, but now you're doomed to make exactly the same mistakes in the future.

I wish I could lose just five more pounds.

[ER]

Granted, but now you're doomed to make exactly the same mistakes in the future.

I wish I could lose just five more pounds.

Alakazam! Exactly five pounds worth of flesh below your right mid-thigh is bitten off by an irate elephant.

I wish could read at 20,000 words per minute with perfect information-retention, and this gift would not result in me being kidnapped/pressed into service to another, that I would not lose my eyesight in the future, or that books would go extinct, or that I'd only have to read books I found lame, or that I'd die before I got to use the gift for a while, or go to prison, in fact I'd be happy with it and life would be great. (Gauntlet down. Get creative!)

[Sitting Duck]

Granted. However, the perfect retention results in your brain's memory storage reaching capacity rather quickly. As a result, all your non-reading memories (family, friends, basic social interactions, how to not poop yourself, etc.) are deleted.

I wish I was capable of getting a good night's rest and wake up refreshed in the morning.

[Sitting Duck]

Addendum to the previous wish granting: Even so, you find yourself content to wallow in your own filth.

[indianasmith]

Dang, I was gonna take that one!  OK, the cycle is broken.

I wish that no wish I make could ever be granted.


CORRUPT THAT!

[Leah]

Granted, but you have bamboo instead of regular grass on your lawn.

I wish that the ice maker in my freezer wasn't broken.

[Rev. Powell]

No one ever corrupted Sitting Duck's wish, so I will: granted, you rest so peacefully that you sleep right through the burglars who completely wipe you out.

Someone else can corrupt El Misfit's wish above.