I think I'm going crazy.

beat_truck · February 22, 2018, 01:30:48 PM

RC, I don't know you, but please don't do anything stupid, like hurting yourself, that you can't take back.

I can relate with your situation. I have some kind of mood disorder that the doctors haven't figured out a good treatment for, yet. Most meds have either done nothing or made me feel worse in some way or another. I go through periods of major deperssion, anxiety, and/or irritability plus they think I am somewhere on the autism/aspberger's spectrum. I'm also trying to get SSI, and I am being supported by my mother, which makes me feel more useless. I currently don't have any good friends as my best friend died a little over a year ago. Sometimes I don't want to live, but I do it anyways because I have to. If for no other reason than it would destroy my mother if something happened to me.

Life really sucks, but you need to press on wether you want to or not. One can only hope that someday it will get better.

zombie no.one · February 22, 2018, 02:18:20 PM

that last post from RC looks ominous. does anyone here know him irl, or aside from this board?

LilCerberus · February 22, 2018, 05:25:39 PM

Shame that you're going through this.

Raffine · February 22, 2018, 11:49:31 PM

Thoughts of strength to you, my ol' pal.

Svengoolie 3 · February 23, 2018, 12:13:03 AM

Can you try one of these?

https://www.fisherwallace.com/pages/depression-treatment?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIoaDWjKO72QIVzGrBCh1fBgXGEAEYASAAEgJVrvD_BwE

beat_truck · February 23, 2018, 02:49:08 AM

Quote from: Svengoolie 3 on February 23, 2018, 12:13:03 AM
Can you try one of these?

https://www.fisherwallace.com/pages/depression-treatment?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIoaDWjKO72QIVzGrBCh1fBgXGEAEYASAAEgJVrvD_BwE

I'm very skeptical. It may not be, but that thing just screams snake oil to me. If it actually worked, you would think every doctor out there would know about it and prescribe it.

Trevor · February 23, 2018, 04:52:51 AM

Quote from: Raffine on February 22, 2018, 11:49:31 PM
Thoughts of strength to you, my ol' pal.

Same from me: hugs, Ronny.

Allhallowsday · February 23, 2018, 11:57:02 AM

Ron and I spoke the other night. It didn't go well, but we had a few laughs. I love that guy. When he drinks, he's very in touch with his feelings... he also gets crazy as bat sh!t. He and I are both going through hard times. I am not blessed with patience. I suspect I'm the catalyst for this declaration. I tried to call him last night, no pickup. I have never met the man, but I have talked with him for so long that I used to speak to Tara Sue too. I know him so long we fight, particularly if we're BOTH drinking.

Suicide is close to his heart for personal reasons. Also in suffering, we all dream of release. But Ron is one of us. He wants to live.

He will get lonely or bored and will remember that we all do love him and I believe will come back.

Ron, remember, I love you. I am your friend, even when I'm an ass.

RCMerchant · February 24, 2018, 01:15:53 AM

I talked to Hallows for about 3 hours tonite. It was good to talk. My brain is f**ked. I feel better-we talked about watching old movies in the early 70's. I apoligize to ER and anybody else that I may have p**sed off. I have to stay. Where else am I gonna go?

ER · February 24, 2018, 01:45:40 AM

By the way, RC, since I'm up late with insomnia and humiliating myself on here with the longest post ever in the name of attempted black humor, glad to see you back, hugs, please take care of yourself, you had us all worried and we all do think you're worth having around. Also try my advice about not letting your blood sugar get low. I hope all is better and gets better still. You're loved here.

RCMerchant · February 24, 2018, 06:53:15 AM

I don't know who I'm kidding-maybe myself-but not too long. I know I'm a drunk. I shouldn't post when I'm hammered. I love you guys too much to stay gone for too long. You all are my support. I would be lost without my Bad Movie friends.

HappyGilmore · February 24, 2018, 09:56:13 PM

Quote from: RCMerchant on February 24, 2018, 06:53:15 AM
I don't know who I'm kidding-maybe myself-but not too long. I know I'm a drunk. I shouldn't post when I'm hammered. I love you guys too much to stay gone for too long. You all are my support. I would be lost without my Bad Movie friends.

I have a number you sent me. We talked once or twice last summer, but we were both drunk so I don't recall much. But it was fun.

I was worried reading some of this, but glad you're here, sir.

Svengoolie 3 · February 25, 2018, 12:05:46 AM

I've been living in fear and dread since the last election. How could my country let that happen? When is this evil moron going to get us into a war? What horror is congress going to dream up next to inflict on people at the bottom economically?

Believe me I've had thought about bailing out too...

indianasmith · February 25, 2018, 09:34:46 AM

Sven - We get the fact that you hate Trump and everyone who voted for him. Guess what? Life is bigger than politics. The sun still shines, the rains still fall, and there is so much that is good and decent and worthy in this life, and YES, in this country, that wasting time on hatred over things you can't change is futile. Find something to give yourself some purpose, and do it! There is MUCH good in the world if you look for it.

zombie no.one · February 25, 2018, 10:33:18 AM

glad you resurfaced RC, from the... abyss? I've done that a few times. hopefully you came back stronger

I think I'm going crazy.

beat_truck

beat_truck