Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer...

[retrorussell]

You should be pining for the fjords, not trees!

How do the cat in the cradle, the silver spoon, Little Boy Blue and the man in the moon keep you from being an involved, caring parent?

[claws]

They don't because I don't have kids :)

Why did Anti-gay rights activist George Rekers resign after a trip with a male escort?

[retrorussell]

He wanted to pull out.  ...um, of the business!  Whew.. nice save!

If dolphins could talk, what would they say?

[vukxfiles]

They'd unintentionally reveal their plans for killing all humans at 2012 and becoming the true rulers of the world, again.

Why do people call aliens Little green men, when they are obviously grey?

[diamondwaspvenom]

Because if they don't call them little green men, Corey the Cabbageman will get them.

How come the early bird special is always worms?

[vukxfiles]

Because the early worm special is always birds

How come Milla Jovovich doesn't want to get breast implants?

[retrorussell]

Because they might leak, making her Milla the Spilla.

Why did Popeye and Bluto fight over such an ugly, skinny b*tch like Olive Oyl?

[claws]

Because Olive made damn fine Margaritas.

Why is soccer popular in Europe?

[Jack]

Because you can spend the entire game waiting in line for beer and waiting in line for the bathroom, and you don't really miss anything.

Why do some dogs bark all the time?

[retrorussell]

Because they think "SHUT UP!!!" means "BARK MORE!!!".

How do porcupines have sex?

[Sleepyskull]

Very, very carefully.


Where did my good pants go?

[Joe the Destroyer]

Check eBay. *whistles*


Where does beef stew come from?

[claws]

You honestly don't wanna know :(

What does it mean to 'walk a thin line'?

[retrorussell]

Ask the high wire balancing act at the circus.

If you offered a penguin a drink with ice in it, would he be offended?

[Sleepyskull]

No, he would just say "That's very, very ice of you!"

Why does it seem like I always have to use the toilet?