Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer...

[JJ80]

They're secretly afraid that he might 'sleigh' them.

Do you want fries with that?

[Joe the Destroyer]

No, that was not a typo.  I want fires with that.

If an angel gets wings when a bell wings, what happens when they lose their wings?

[retrorussell]

They grow horns and trade in their harps for pitchforks.

Shouldn't cufflinks on a 3-piece suit make it a 4-piece suit?

[AndyC]

Two cufflinks would make it a five-piece suit.

Why is Frank Beard the only member of ZZ Top who doesn't have a beard?

[retrorussell]

It's a joke name, like the bald stooge named Curly.

Since everyone knows about Calgon, what is the REAL ancient Chinese secret?

[AndyC]

Lucy Liu used to be a guy.


What is "natural male enhancement" anyway?

[Mr. DS]

Watching porn

What does the "C" in AndyC's name stand for?

[Derf]

Canadian. Duh.

Who started the whole naming colors after objects thing (avocado green, peach, orange, etc.)?

[JJ80]

Wasn't it that 'Man From Del Monte'.

How many grains of sand are required on a beach to create the optimum conditions for comfortable donkey rides?

[retrorussell]

Just one grain of sand.  Then you're off to never-neverland.

If Ghostbusters was remade today with a whole new cast, who should play Venkman?

[AndyC]

Oh, somebody young, good-looking and physically fit. Take your pick; they're interchangeable.

How do they get the eleven herbs and spices into the Caramilk bar?

[Derf]

Coercion and blackmail.

What didn't the "Hear No Evil" monkey hear?

[Rev. Powell]

I tried to tell him my life story, but he just kept putting his hands over his ears and saying "I'm not hearing this!"

Who would win a DRACULA v. FRANKENSTEIN rematch?

[AndyC]

The teenage girls, because Dracula will be a sparkly wuss.

Why was the finale of "Lost" so friggin' stupid?

[Derf]

Because it was written by tv show writers.


In the medical profession, what is the difference between an M.D. and a D.O.?