October Horror Movie Massacre!!!

[fulci420]

Hey everybody good to see my thread still stickied after an entire year! You must really love me, is anybody down for another horror marathon, Ive started mine over at http://letterboxd.com/fulci420/list/september-october-halloween-horror-massacre/ but will happily post my reviews over here as well if other people want to participate.

[claws]

10/01/14 (1)



Crocodile (1979) ~ Hurricane sets giant Crocodile free and starts destroying small villages while eating people on the side. A Doctor, his friend, a Reporter and a sailor are trying to stop the beast. Thai-Trash Jaws ripoff that would've made Ed Wood proud: fugly non-actors reading their lines, stock footage, real animal violence, continuity errors, choppy editing, disco muzak, awkward dialogue, failed attempt at humor and comic relief. As expected, the roaring Crocodile also changes its size by the minute. Under appreciated bad movie. 5/5

[Jack]

disco muzak

I'm sold 

Hellraiser III: Hell on Earth (1992) - a guy buys a statue that's got Pinhead, the box, and a bunch of his victims carved into it - yeah this probably ain't gonna end well.  Terry Farrell stars as a reporter investigating the case.  It won't be long before she's battling cenobites and Pinhead who are trying to take over the world.  I liked this, it's pretty cheesy but plenty of fun and some good gross-out stuff.  4/5.

[SynapticBoomstick]

And so it begins. I have a busy schedule at the moment so I'll likely be jamming several films together whenever I can.


1. Bride of the Gorilla (1951)


Man, early movie posters were great.

Here's a question: When is Lon Chaney not Lon Chaney? Answer: When he's a police commissioner. Yeah, I thought he was going to be the gorilla, too. What we have here is a love triangle between a plantation owner, his wife, and the plantation foreman. The foreman removes a corner of said triangle with a constrictor that is somehow both poisonous and deadly within seconds (let's hear it for b-movie herpetology!) only to come down with a case of the "Ook-ooks" during his wedding to the plantation owner's widow after the obligatory resident mystic/gypsy/soothsayer witnesses the whole thing and curses him with an Eviiiil Plaaaaant!!!

Rating: 4/5 (+2 decent gorilla suit, +1 Cool Mirror Shot, +1 Angry Orchard)
Candy Rating: Nerds

I will always eat Nerds, all those flavors mixed together in tiny crunchy bits. It surprised me that I'd enjoy a man-in-a-gorilla suit movie as much as I enjoyed this one but I think it has a lot to do with the execution. Well, there was hard cider, too, but some of it comes from the execution. While this is a gorilla suit movie, the suit itself is only on-screen three times and for no longer than a few seconds. Also, even for the short amount of time that it can be seen the suit is actually pretty good; it's certainly one of the better gorilla suits I've seen. The film is also nicely ambiguous when dealing with the question of whether the foreman is actually a gorilla or not. I say this because, while you do see the gorilla, it's only under very specific circumstances. So if you feel that your b-movie diet lacks gorilla, this is a good source; much better than Kong Island.

Trailer - Bride Of The Gorilla (1951)

[claws]

10/02/14 (2)



Day of the Ax (2007) ~ Three friends driving to a cabin for a weekend vacation encounter legendary "J.R." - a deranged axe-killer wearing a mask out to get women pregnant.
Awful shot-on-video Backwoods Z-film ripping off Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Halloween. For "originality" they added a brief supernatural/occult plot line. Gore effects consists of red watery paint ("blood") and most of the murders are done with a hammer. Besides that you'll get full frontal female nudity, semi-torture porn, a chubby dude tied to a table and gutted, a main girl who can't run (for real) plus cringe inducing Creed like end credits song. Hopefully the only really bad movie this month. 1/5

[Jack]

There's Nothing Out There (1991) - some kids go to a cabin in the woods. One of them watches a ton of horror movies and is paranoid that everything that happens in those movies is going to happen to them; and of course he's right. The cheesiest monster imaginable comes after them. This was actually a lot of fun (except for the horror movie guy who was really annoying). Lots of silly humor and lots of hot babes. Some of the dialog was actually clever too "Yeah you mix water and dirt and you get mud...learn something new every day."  4/5.

[claws]

10/03/14 (4)



The Silent Scream (1979) ~ Student Scotty must look for accommodations off-campus and finds vacancy at a mansion on the beach run by a creepy guy and his strange mother. Soon enough Scotty and her three housing mates fall victim to a deadly secret hidden behind the walls of the mansion. Solid Terror Flick with good performances and thrilling moments of suspense. 4/5

The Unseen (1980) ~ Three female journalists stuck in rural county without a place to stay overnight find vacancy at an old house owned by a creepy guy and his strange wife. Soon enough the three women fall victim to a deadly secret hidden behind the walls of the house. A bit on the campy side with misogynistic undertones and a mind blowing unintentional hilarious ending. 3.5/5

[JoeTheDestroyer]

If I weren't studying for my Central Service exam, I would be watching the crap out of my DVDs and Netflix. 

[SynapticBoomstick]

2. Severed: Forest of the Dead (2005)



How many ways can you create a zombie: radiation, asteroids, cosmic rays, genetic testing, black magic, toxic waste, viruses? How about trees?

A logging company tests genetically engineered trees on a remote island in a bid to increase the lumber yield. A group of hardcore environmentalists set up camp on the island in an attempt to stop the logging in general. A chainsaw accident results in a sap-contaminated wound that turns the unfortunate logger into an undead flesh-eater. The infection spreads across the island and communication is lost. The CEO sends his son in to check on the investment. Junior finds zombies have overrun the island and the loggers and "ecos" that still survive have banded together in a bid to escape. But this being a zombie movie with a big company in it, things aren't what they appear to be.

Severed: Forest of the Dead Trailer (2005)

Rating: 5/5 (+1 zombies, +3 lumberjack equipment and heavy machinery, +1 horror devices)
Candy Rating: Comic Book - Holy Crap!

One year when I was in middle school a big group of us got together and went door-to-door as a final hurrah. I remember that year not only because it was the last year I went out but also because there was one guy giving out freaking comic books, three for each kid. That's probably the coolest treat idea ever.

Zombie movies follow a pretty predictable pattern so they usually only have the make-up, setting, and use of horror going for them. I wasn't expecting anything from Severed but what I got was totally worth watching. Some of the zombies look pretty goofy early on but they're used to good effect. They're slow and stupid but there are always more of them than there are of you and on an island there's only so many places to hide. Also, imagine you've chained yourself to a tree before the s%$t hit the fan and now you're trapped by your own hand as a horde shambles towards you; this zombie is leaning in to take a bite out of your face and you can't back away, you can only look into its mouth.

The reasons for the two groups of survivors to be at odds are also much better than, "Everything's gone crazy, give me your stuff!" The loggers and the environmentalists already had a number of reasons to resent and distrust each other before the outbreak even occurs and for some of them the need to band together now hasn't changed things.

There's also lots of zombie squashing via heavy industrial machinery and logging equipment which is really why we've here anyway.

[Jack]

Return of the Living Dead: Rave to the Grave (2005) - some college kids get their hands on a barrel of that trioxin stuff and have the brilliant idea of selling it as a drug.  And there's a big Halloween rave coming up.  This was fun, very tongue-in-cheek, with a hot babe in the lead.  Other than that pretty standard stuff.  3.5/5.

Buried Alive (2007) - some kids go to a cabin in the woods but [insert family folklore here] a ghost is out to get them.  Likable characters, plenty of likable T&A, just a nice sense of fun about it.  Ah heck, 4/5.

[claws]

10/04/14 (5)



Blood Massacre (1991) ~ Four psychopathic criminals seek shelter on a farm after robbing a video rental store (!). They take the family of four hostage, but things get out of hand when they realize the family is actually a clan of ... cannibals.
Fun and bloody Don Dohler trash filmed in 1987/1988 but not released until 1991. Apparently the producers disappeared with the original master footage, leaving Dohler only with a workprint for release. 4/5

[Jim H]

Rough beginning of October for me, horror movie wise.  But yesterday, as part of a party, watched two slasher films. 

Curtains - Canadian slasher film.  Was very hard to get into because everyone watching made fun of it, and it's clearly going for an eerie, suspenseful feel, which is ruined by mockery.  So, I found it hard to judge.  But, I'd still say it's a bit of a mixed bag.  Some of the performances looked good, and some of the imagery was pretty effective.  I dunno, I can't really give it a fair shake as far as a rating though.

Cold Prey - this was watched later, with fewer people who were more receptive.  Thought this was a solid entry.  Genuinely creepy and suspenseful early on, with some good scare bits later.  Very low body count and gore for a slasher, by the way.  Not an amazing film, but a solid slasher.  7/10.

[Jack]

Pit and the Pendulum (1961) - a guy travels to a remote castle to investigate the death of his sister, who used to be married to Vincent Price's character. Price's cute sister lives there too. This is definitely a favorite of mine, with good acting, lots of suspense, and enough Gothic atmosphere for several movies. 5/5.

[SynapticBoomstick]

3. Alien Abduction (2014)



I saw trailers for this through internet banners and thought it looked scary. While some shots were effective at instilling a sense of dread, most of the film does a lot wrong. Stock aliens that do random creepy stuff? Check. The worst example that I've yet seen for filming everything? Check. Oh, yeah, this is a "found-footage" movie. Annoying family? Check. Token ignorant redneck? Check.

Rating: 1/5 (+1 for some good shots, -4 every-damn-thing else)
Candy Rating: Those mummies and vampires made out of chalky powder

It looks good but tastes awful, I'd rather watch Prometheus.


4. Blood Glacier (2013)



A group of scientists doing research on a glacier discover a strange red organic substance melting out of the ice that causes major mutations in any organism that consumes it through water or gets exposed to it through blood contact. All hell naturally breaks loose when all sorts of dangerous animals get discombobulated and mashed together in a blender.

Rating: 2/5 (+1 make-up and creature effects work, +1 location, -3 dubbing)
Candy Rating: Pretzel M&M's - I'll eat them if they're around but they're not the same as chocolate-covered pretzels. I don't get that.

I went in blind and very interested with this film. What I watched conjured up memories of Alien and The Thing which for me wasn't a bad thing. The setting was spectacular as well and the ideas were interesting so it's really a shame that the dubbing was so horrible. Many scenes lack emotion due to wooden dialogue reading and more than once I would get the impression that these characters somehow didn't give a damn about their situation. I would probably rate this one higher if I could get a copy of the film in its original language.

Also, if anyone can explain "Random Girl" to me I'd love to know.

[JaseSF]

[1]The Seventh Sign (1988): a pregnant woman named Abby Quinn (Demi Moore) fears for her unborn child after meeting a mysterious stranger named David who seems to lead her to believe signs of an impending apocalypse are unfolding all around her. Is she going crazy or is this all really happening? This has some good and disturbing moments, some rather startling horrific imagery, a sense of mystery that keeps one intrigued yet this still feels a tad overlong, a little less scary that one really wants, and a tad bit predictable at times. It also offers up some pregnant Demi Moore nudity if that's your thing. Not bad of its type but not particularly scary. Overall, just a decent supernatural thriller.

[2]Fright Night (1985): Charley Brewster (William Ragsdale) is a teenage boy with an healthy obsession for two things: classic horror films starring and featuring horror host Peter Vincent (Roddy McDowall) and his girlfriend Amy (Amanda Bearse). However Charley soon finds himself battling another more disturbing problem: his next door neighbor Jerry Dandrige (Chris Sarandon) might just be a murderous, blood-sucking vampire but no one will believe him. Eventually Charley turns for help to the only "vampire killer" expert he knows: horror movie star Peter Vincent.

This movie is so much freaking fun. I always have a blast watching this one. Definitely one of the most fun 1980s horror films for me with terrific charm, a sense of love for the classics of the genre, wonderfully gooey and creepy FX, startling makeup, and a great cast. Has some decent genuine scares too every now and then and some great comedy moments too. A rare mix of the two that seems to really work well but which wasn't terribly unusual for the 80s.