Alex's even longer post thread.

[Alex]

Pretty much the last thing that happened before we left was another car crash, although we were not involved in that one. We were staying with Kristi's younger brother and his family. Their eldest son rear ended another car. No one was hurt in that one, but he's a new driver and will have been a bit shook up by it.

It was a long ass trip home, but it has been a good holiday. Ash got on really well with his cousins. We have discovered he does not like babies though. Specifically when they cry. On the other hand he is an adrenaline junkie whose love of rollercoasters is only limited by him being an inch or so too short to ride most of them. He loves trains, but only ones that are moving. Take him to a museum where they are all static and he won't want to go near them.

It was slightly strange being in the US for the 11th of September. I was mildly surprised that it wasn't more of a memorial day. I wonder if some year down the line it will become a thing like November the 5th is in the UK?

A few photos from the trip. There are a whole load more.

Somewhere in Yellowstone.








This crow attacked Susie's and Kellie's cars when we refused to share our sandwiches with it.


This deer was about 6 feet away from me. We had venison that night.


Ash out cruising with Bailey.


Ash being rather excited at the train museum. He was certainly wearing the right tee shirt.

[Alex]

While I was on holiday, a good friend of the family was proudly showing me his gun collection and explaining all the technical details of the weapon, its history and ammo. Every so often I'd ask a pointed question. It became very evident that he knew everything about the gun except how to effectively use it. He told me if his country was ever invaded, he'd be ready to defend it. My guess is he'd be dead within 5 minutes of combat time. I tried to free up some time to teach him how to use it a bit more, but it just didn't work out. Things like he practised shooting at 100 yards, while even as a second-line soldier, I could hit a human-sized target at 300 meters (a meter and a yard are fairly close in size). If he gets close enough to shoot someone (and we'll pretend he is one of the 1% who can just pick up a gun and shoot someone straight off), maybe he'll take out an enemy soldier, but more likely he'd give his position away, the enemy squad goes to cover and either they take him out by sheer weight of firepower, or they keep him pinned down, outflank him take him out, or call down mortar fire on his position.

Really, if you want to kill soldiers learn how to operate a mortar. They kill far more people than guns in a war situation. Any weapon where you don't have to actually see who you are firing at does better. Get yourself a spotter who can call down fire and off you go.

My veteran's card arrived while I was away, along with my certificate of service and a nice little metal badge. Nice way to commemorate 22 years. I'd rather have the money though.   They asked me if I wanted this stuff and I decided, well if I am entitled to it then I am bloody well claiming it.

While we were going through Yellowstone, we'd picked up a whole load of snacks to much on. Kristi and Susie were having popcorn, and it smelled good so I randomly grabbed one of the packets, opened it and started eating. My immediate reaction on tasting what I'd picked up was "WHAT THE f**k AMERICA?" Who the hell thought of cheese-flavoured popcorn? Seriously, there has to be a very special Hel waiting for anyone who would create such a monstrosity. No Valhalla, Nirvana or heaven, straight to eternal punishment and damnation for that twisted MF.

The cover came off my new tattoo (yes I know you disapprove, but it is something I wanted and in my job identifying marks can actually be useful).

[ER]

Aren't gun nuts tedious? I often hear similar sentiments where I live, how a citizen with his firearms is defense against the tyranny of his government,  and a bulwark against foreign invasion, and while it's  true many who say this are veterans of military service, to most I just want to say....you fool.

Organized militias don't stand long against a trained army, and armed individuals even less. One of the most tragically cherished American myths is how the Minute Men won the Revolutionary War, when their contribution was barely worth calling minimal. Somewhere there's a statistic about how many shots Minute Men fired at Lexington and Concord and a few other places versus casualties on the British side, and these guys weren't even placing one shot in a thousand, if I remember right.

I think to most people guns are a security blanket for grownups.

[Alex]

I don't object to people having the right to own guns, but I do believe they should also have the responsibility to learn how to care for, use and store them properly. This guy does have his guns in a locked room, inside a safe, with his ammo stored separately and he is a nice guy. I just thought he is also incredibly naive. You need to be fighting for somewhere around a year to eighteen months before I'd call someone a veteran soldier and able to shoot someone. Given the limited range he was working with, the open ground around Utah... I just didn't fancy his chances of surviving day one.

He had tried to join the army when he was younger, but due to his having broken his back and having hearing problems he was rejected. I pointed out his wife and four daughters and told him that if he had been in the military there was every chance he wouldn't have any of that. Hopefully, it helped him feel better.

[chefzombie]

WHAT????  YOU DON'T LIKE CHEESE POPCORN????? SACRILEGE!!!!!
   no seriously, do you eat cheese puffs? or are you one of those sickos like brad that won't eat flavored chips( etc) at all? we argue every time i visit, because i eat cheese puffs and taco doritos and he hates the way they smell, much less taste.
  of course, i just toss him out of the garage and threaten not to cook, lol! i figure if i'm smoking in the garage and he stays out, then he can stay out while i eat my junk too. and miss cutie, she LOVES cheese puffs! 

[Alex]

I can take or leave cheesy puffs. The UK has a much wider range of flavours for chips (although we call chips crisps, and what you call French fries we call chips), than I've seen stateside.

Trying to fit the new games I bought into my shelves. Finding Gloomhaven for about 60% of the regular price and being given a copy of Dark Souls has somewhat interfered with my already sorted-out stuff. Nikki is supposed to be coming around today, but she just had some major dental treatment so we will see how that goes.

[Alex]

Well, today is certainly a big day. Last day of my short-lived freedom as a civilian, the end of the longest time I have spent unemployed (although I was able to support myself the entire time even to the extent of paying for a family holiday to the US), Lilly-Beth's birthday, Ash goes back to school.

After we've dropped Ash off at school, we will head into Elgin and go put some fresh flowers down. It has been raining heavily outside and I am chatting with someone I know who also seems to be awake at this early hour.

20 minutes before Ash is due to get up and of course now I start to feel tired because of course. Oh well, I should go iron his uniform, sort out his lunch.

I wonder if Clive Barker has ever written anything that wasn't a peek into his sexual preferences.

[chefzombie]

massive hugs to all of you, sweetheart....

[Alex]

Well after a brief flirtation with freedom and civilian life it is back to being in the military. It is strange to me to think I'll have been an airman (or aviator as the management prefers us to be called even though I wasn't a pilot), and now a soldier. I could easily have parlayed my experience and skills into a 6 figure job and yet here I am basically becoming a glorified security guard making what, 15-20% of my earning potential.

Hmm, that was my best shot at talking myself into going for a 'bigger' job. Nope. Never thought I'd want to be a homebody.

Slept until 3ish this morning and then lay in bed until 5 before restlessness compelled me to get out of bed. Bought the computer game of Gloomhaven last night and went to download it this morning only to discover that yesterday they released a major patch for the game that according to many, many reviews has destroyed the game. Hopefully, it will get rolled back or fixed.

Ironed a shirt and trousers for attesting today. Maybe I should put on a tie.

Damn, I hate ties. Useless things. I mean if they had a pocket for storing stuff I could see a point to them.

Well I put on my clothes, went in, signed a few bits of paperwork, was given the choice of an oath to god or attesting to Charlie Mk III. Took the attesting option as a oath sword to something I don't believe in would mean nothing to me. Charles (conspiracy theories about them having been executed and replaced by robots aside) seems to actually be provably real.

[Alex]

Been doing lots of arrivals stuff. Had to go up to clothing stores to get measured for my uniform. Turns out they still had my old kit issue book from 2001. Hell, they stopped using that system a decade ago, but it did have all my measurements.

If they'd looked for it earlier I could have spent the morning in bed instead. 

Got my haircut for the first time in many months and now I am back to the short hair most people who know me seem to associate with me. Then again they did miss the 6 years I spent just growing it long.

The general gist I get from my fellow MPGS guys will do their job right but are here for an easy life. I am good with that. Found out I am going to be spending a day shooting and then have to follow it up with a night shoot. This I am less good with. Got to travel to Fort George for it too. That means that even when we finish it will be another hour getting home.

[Alex]

Well, that is my first week back in gainful employment completed. Such as it is. I am now off until next Friday, with the caveat of doing some courses between now and then.

I'll be doing the front desk on control of entry right off. In at the deep end I guess.

Well, the deep end is still going to be quite shallow. I've done it before and while there have been some changes, mostly it is still the same process.

Going to take Ash out into Elgin today. No particular reason other than taking him out and spending some quality time together. Doubtless, he'd rather stay home and play with trains but just as our parents dragged us out on walks we didn't care for so the cycle continues.

[Alex]

I've been doing some mental arithmetic and I've worked out that on our recent holiday, we spent approximately $5000 on stuff we brought home. That is a fair amount of stuff I'd say.

Out of everything we bought, only two things however don't have a 'Made in China' stamp on them. One was a second-hand boardgame from the 70's (printed in Maryland), and the other was a sticker. Would have been nice if the option to buy stuff actually made in the country we were visiting had been available. Or even from a country there isn't a good chance of being at war with soon.

Made myself a lovely burger for lunch. Big, thick one with cheese and a mushroom stuffed with garlic and some other herbs on top.

The wound on Kristi's arm was shining a bit, so I had a bit of a poke around and pulled these out.



So much for the medics on the scene who checked her wounds and said they were clear.

[Alex]

After getting Ash to school I headed out for the day to Inverness. I found myself wandering around a run-down part of the city. It was wet out, but not currently raining. I love that weather. Autumn really is my time of the year. The nights are long, but there is still plenty of daylight. The weather is cool. I walked along feeling like I was the king of the world.

At that point, it also hit me that while I had bought all of the presents I wanted to get Kristi (other than any stuff that I randomly see that I think she'll like), I hadn't yet bought a single present for Ash to give to mummy.

One quick visit to the shops later, I had a couple of bags bulging with goodies for her. And a few smaller things for myself.  My previously highly buoyant mood seemed to absolutely crash once I got inside the shopping centre though. Easy come, easy go I guess.

On the way home, some random stranger wanted to strike up a conversation. I found myself being easily distracted though and wasn't really following the conversation. When he asked me if I was ok I replied "Sorry, I just had some awesome sex with a Brazillian woman nearly half my age and I am having problems thinking about anything else." Anyway, that seemed to be a satisfactory reply. Of course, it obviously wasn't true.

I mean the sex was on the good side of average (which would be to say highly enjoyable but not mind-blowing).

I often find saying something completely unexpected in order to end conversations. Not always with random strangers either.

Anyway, I got home and hid the assorted presents with the other stuff I've picked up so far. I've only picked up Ash his big present from me so far. I guess I should get him some smaller stuff too, although I have the funny feeling he'll see his train and not care about anything else. We are discussing if I should build it up for him the night before so it is all ready to go when he gets up in the morning, or let him unwrap the box. Setting it up once he see's it is going to be next to impossible. I think I'll have to leave him to open it himself though.

[chefzombie]

he's at " the age of toolosity" as my da said, so as frustrating as it will be, let him " help" you put it together, and sneak in a few lessons on how to hold the tools properly, things kike that. please?

[Alex]

Collected my new uniform. The sizing was mostly correct. When I say mostly, I mean I was given trousers that were evidently designed for the heyday of Andre the Giant.

Luckily I just happened to have accidently kept one of the pairs of combat trousers that I was supposed to hand back.

Going to see about a new addition to the family today. Me and Kristi were talking last night and we both agreed it is time. We also have a child plan meeting at the school (it is the support workers rather than the teachers who are on strike), then we have a game of Dark Souls planned for tonight.

So much for my quiet last day before properly restarting work.