THE BEST MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 riffs

[Trevor]

Space Mutiny:

A lot of robots are shooting lasers at the protagonists and not hitting them.

Mike: They shouldn't have set their phasers to "miss."

😳😂😅

[LilCerberus]

Ator the blade master (under a different name)...

The mimes of war...
Ator builds a hang glider, & everybody says, "Aw, Come On!"

[Trevor]

CAVE DWELLERS

[Bad guy is stabbed from behind]
Joel: "Hurts, don't it?"
[Bad guy with moustache falls over: he ded]
Crow: "Give my moustache to..Trevor!"
Trevor:  "No thanks"

😊😊😊

[Rev. Powell]

This site pulls up a random riff: https://mst3kquotes.pythonanywhere.com/

[Trevor]

Skydivers

"seems like they forgot to have anything happen in this movie"

"So a stranger comes to town, touches nobody's life and leaves."

😃😄😀😆🤣😂

[Trevor]

LASERBLAST

Mike: "These plains were once filled with wild broccoli like this."
😃

[Trevor]

APPRECIATING YOUR PARENTS:
Narrator: Tommy likes to be with his parents, and this evening is a little special.  For it's the day for Tommy to receive his allowance. (dad hands him money)
Crow: Here's a penny.  Happy Birthday.

Narrator (describing Mom's daily routine): She cleared the table, washed the dishes and put the food away.  And made everything spic and span.
Joel: While suppressing her own dreams..

Narrator (as Tommy plays football with friends): And he knows that to have a good game, you must all work together.
Crow: And take steroids!
Narrator: And everyone must do their share.
Servo: Or have a rich dad.

A DATE WITH YOUR FAMILY:

Servo (upon seeing the title card): The Woody Allen story!

Narrator: This boy and girl coming home from school seem pretty content with life.
Crow: They're high!

(Older brother runs into younger brother)
Narrator: Hello there!
Servo: Who are you?

Narrator (describing the family's table-seating etiquette): Brother seats junior.
Crow: Daughter obsesses with the flowers!
Narrator: Then helps mother with her chair as he would his best girl.
Mike: The less said about this, the better.

Narrator: They converse pleasantly while Dad serves.  I said, pleasantly, for that is the key note at dinnertime.  It is not only good manners, but good sense.
Crow: Emotions are for ethnic people.

Narrator: No one starts eating until Father has served himself.
Mike: THIS MEANS YOU!
Narrator: Always wait for the hostess, in this case, Mother, to begin eating before you start.
Mike: Father feigns eating, draws Junior out, then disowns him!

Narrator: Mother and Father guide the converstaional trend if they desire.  After all, they made all this possible.  And they want to talk over their day with each other.
(Camera on Father)
Crow: I'm moving to Fire Island, dear.

      

[Trevor]

Pod People

Tom: "Chief?"
Crow: "McCloud!"

😀😂