Recent viewings

[claws]

Plaguers (2008) Blu-ray

Crew on a space mission heading back to earth want to dispose unknown green energy ball they picked up somewhere. When they receive a distress call they dock for rescue but the people in distress turn out to be four sexy female space pirates. Things start to get rough when one pirate turns undead after a close encounter with the green energy ball. Soon enough a deadly fight for survival breaks out as the undead disease spreads like wildfire.

From director Brad Sykes who gave us the hilarious cheesy Camp Blood (2000) and the god-awful Zombie Chronicles (2001). Plaguers turned out to be a fun no-budget sci-fi horror flick with impressive handmade f/x (no CGI whatsoever) and an old school feeling in general. Lots of squirting goo, women in tight skirts and women fighting each other. Enjoyable. 3.5/5

The Dark Lurking (2010) Blu-ray

A group of people in a space ship (I think) must try to reach the highest level in order to survive a zombified outbreak of some sorts. Along the way they encounter alien creatures as well, and even Lucifer drops by to say hello.

Messy shooter with tons of slime, pink water blood and practical effects (no CGI). This one was made in Australia on a tight budget with no sympathetic characters and lots of bad acting. This movie is also very "wet" - people are drenched and constantly dripping, and the cheese is not always fun. 2.5/5

[tracy]

The venomous and amoral wife of a wealthy architect tries,any way she can,to break up the blossoming romance between her husband and his new mistress...a good-natured young widow who holds a dark past.
Elizabeth Taylor is both elegant and shrewish,Michael Caine plays the cad quite well and Susannah York is free-spirited and yet mysterious....excellent film.

[Jack]

The Terror Within (1989) - in a post-apocalyptic future, some people are living in an underground facility, and one of their patrols brings back a pregnant woman they found out in the wasteland. Pregnancy doesn't turn out so well - she gives birth to a nasty little critter and then we've got your usual Alien type movie. This started SO slow, with clichéd characters I didn't give a crap about. But there were a few decent characters, and lo and behold, it didn't take too long before they were the only ones left. The movie got a whole lot better then. Oh the monster was your typical guy in a suit, but even taking that into consideration I still think they did a great job creating a tense and suspenseful situation with characters that I cared about. You know, for a rather low budget B movie. Probably doesn't quite deserve a 4/5, but I'm givin' it one anyway.

[lester1/2jr]

tracy- that looks awesome

[JaseSF]

Touch the Sun: Devil's Hill (1988): Young Badge (Alexander Jacobs) and his family are struggling to survive as farmers in a remote Tasmanian valley. When Badge's cousins' mother takes ill, the struggling family finds themselves faced with the added burden of taking care of them as their father has gone to visit their mother in hospital and Badge's father has agreed to tend his brother's farm while he's gone. It proves anything but easy given Badge's older cousin Sam (Cameron Atkins) proves a bit of a bully and a showoff. Then a nasty storm arrives during the night leading to one of the vital cows running away. So Badge's mom and the kids decide to go on a long, hard journey in search of the valuable cow which might just mean their continued existence in the valley. Inevitably the kids end up on a kind of epic adventure in the Tasmanian wilderness and face the challenge of conquering the daunting heights of Devil's Hill not to mention their own individual fears and self doubt.

This Australian TV Movie was rather good. It moves at a good pace and the performances feel surprisingly believable and realistic and yeah the kids don't even prove all that annoying. It's really about family though and one's coming of age on one's own too. One problem here is it feels kind of weird, but not entirely unbelievable I guess, that lead Badge kind of has a little crush on his own cousin Bron (Emma Pugh). Also we never really do figure out just what was in that cave and cows here seem to manage to get to seemingly unlikely places. Nevertheless, this was still an enjoyable kids adventure film. ***1/2 out of ***** stars.

Sgt. Bilko (1996): Master Sergeant Ernest G. Bilko (Steve Martin) finds his cushy position on a base threatened with the arrival of an old adversary from his past - one Major Thorn (Phil Hartman) who threatens to expose Bilko for all the many gambling schemes and other scams Bilko has going on at the base. Now Bilko has to make his soft, lazy, pampered soldiers look like the real thing and himself as well or he could well be out of a job. Bilko however sees it as just another obstacle to overcome, another grand scheme to pull off that is until Thorn starts to play dirty by going after Bilko's long-suffering love interest Rita (Glenne Headley).

Despite a great guest cast including short appearances by Chris Rock and a longer, more significant role for Dan Aykroyd, this is just adequate. Like most TV show to film adaptations, this I honestly feels pales greatly next to its original source material. It significantly dumbs things down aiming for a broader and less demanding audience. Sure it has a few funny sequences here and there, the best of which features the soft soldiers forced to run the obstacle course  and also pretend to be occupying quarters not actually their own. Martin and Aykroyd too both get a few moments to shine here and there but it all still feels so predictable and downright formula what with the bad guy making the play for the girl and our heroic lead, whose actually far from heroic in his behaviour, has to try and win back his beloved. "The Phil Silvers Show" was so much more original and funny than this movie it's sad it shares the same character name in the lead but if you want an adequate, formula comedy with some funny bits here and there to kill an hour and a half, this is alright for that purpose. **1/2 out of ***** stars.

[fulci420]

Anthropagus-I found this film on youtube and checked it out due to reading about it multiple times for its notorious repuation. Banned during the video nasty period this film certainly is shocking in parts but is overall quite dull. Large segments of the film are devoid of any real suspense or interest weakening it greatly. The shot where the killer (george eastman) is revealed is great as well as are a couple of other gross out parts. But overall this is pretty lackbuster and i was glad i did not pay for this.

Nightmare City-Now this was far from dull! Ridiculous Umberto Lenzi film that is insanely packed with action. Pretty much the energetic zombies (or infected people) get out of a plane and just go wild for the next 90 minutes. Amazing example of italian ridiculousness and an admitted infuence on grindhouses "Planet Terror"/

[Jack]

Blood Relic (2005) - cheap slasher about some kids that work at an airplane museum. An evil talisman is found that makes the person who possesses it into a killer, but who exactly has the thing? This wasn't too bad. Lots of boobs to take your mind off everything else    Characters weren't bad at all and it might have had a little bit of suspense to it. 3.5/5.

Vice Academy (1989) - sort of a cheap Police Academy ripoff. Linnea Quigley and some other babes want to become cops, and in order to graduate from the academy they need to arrest at least 10 people. Of course there's the spoiled girl (who's probably the cutest of the bunch) who's daddy is the chief of police, so she's got a big advantage. But Linnea and company get a tip on a prostitution ring and go undercover in an attempt to arrest all those folks. It was made by Rick Sloane, the guy who did Hobgoblins, but lacked his usual screwy charm. Where it really excelled was in the "big '80s hair" department:



Linnea looked pretty hot in a little spandex outfit too  3/5.

[ChaosTheory]

CORIOLANUS - Ralph Fiennes stars in and directs this modernization of Shakespeare's play about a proud & vengeful Roman general.  This is my favorite movie that I've seen so far this year.  The modern setting works and the cast is great - in particular Brain Cox and (surprisingly) Gerard Butler.  9/10

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZk33Jn2yKk
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THE WOMAN IN BLACK - Victorian ghost story starring Daniel Radcliffe.  Visually striking and not bad, but forgettable. 5/10

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dPYMUnJGURI
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[Rev. Powell]

SUN DON'T SHINE (2012): A sullen and violent man and his jealous and manipulative girlfriend flee from cops in central Florida. Good performances and sporadic emotional outbursts can't save this tale of lovers on the run that covers familiar ground too slowly. 2/5.

[tracy]

Entertaining werewolf film about siblings that try to save a woman who was in a wreck they caused and become infected with the werewolf curse. Then they have to figure out who the creature is to destroy it to break the curse.

[FatFreddysCat]

"Death Proof" (2007)
http://www.youtube.com/v/aEVyC8FByng

A psycho stunt man (Kurt Russell) who gets his kicks by killing girls with his souped-up car meets his match when he unwisely starts a cat-and-mouse game with a trio of troublemaking babes out for a test drive...

Quentin Tarantino's half of the "Grindhouse" combo pack starts off VERY slowly, to the point where I almost bailed out on it (I swear, the first 45 minutes are nothing but the characters talkin', talkin', talkin', blah blah blah... I was practically screaming "SHUT THE HELL UP AND DO SOMETHING ALREADY!" but I'm glad I stuck with this flick because the second half is total automotive bad-assery, culminating in some of the best car-chase footage ever put to celluloid.

Of the two "Grindhouse" flicks I definitely preferred "Planet Terror" but once this thing finally started kickin' ass I have to admit that I got hooked.

[claws]

"Death Proof" (2007)
http://www.youtube.com/v/aEVyC8FByng

A psycho stunt man (Kurt Russell) who gets his kicks by killing girls with his souped-up car meets his match when he unwisely starts a cat-and-mouse game with a trio of troublemaking babes out for a test drive...

Quentin Tarantino's half of the "Grindhouse" combo pack starts off VERY slowly, to the point where I almost bailed out on it (I swear, the first 45 minutes are nothing but the characters talkin', talkin', talkin', blah blah blah... I was practically screaming "SHUT THE HELL UP AND DO SOMETHING ALREADY!" but I'm glad I stuck with this flick because the second half is total automotive bad-assery, culminating in some of the best car-chase footage ever put to celluloid.

Of the two "Grindhouse" flicks I definitely preferred "Planet Terror" but once this thing finally started kickin' ass I have to admit that I got hooked.

I was always torn on Death Proof, and it took me a few viewings to fully appreciate it for what it is. Though I do prefer the first half of the movie because it works more like a "slasher" flick, plus Tarantino managed to pull a few - but brief - creepy moments.
Death Proof is an entirely different beast in the Grindhouse (2007) movie version. Both the extended (single movie release) and "edited" (original Grindhouse version) have their pros and cons. Tarantino's biggest mistake was not including Vanessa Ferlito's lap dance in the theatrical cut. It is without a doubt the highlight of the movie.

[FatFreddysCat]

"Jersey Shore Shark Attack" (2012)

http://www.youtube.com/v/a5HU_0CX1go

Guidos vs. Great Whites! When Seaside Heights is invaded by hordes of man-eating sharks (drawn from the depths by vibrations from undersea drilling) it's up to T.C., Paulie Balzac, Nooki and the gang to save the July 4th weekend.

I expected this movie to suck but it was actually a pretty damn funny bit of SyFy Channel nonsense that sends up both the "Jaws" series and the "Jersey Shore" fad.

Stars: pretty much every Italian-American actor in Hollywood, I think, including Jack Scalia, Paul Sorvino and some "Sopranos" guy whose name I can't remember. Oh, and this flick's version of "Snooki" is better looking than the real one, by a mile!

[JaseSF]

Cop and a Half (1993): A gruff veteran detective named Nick McKenna (Burt Reynolds) finds his life suddenly thrown into chaos when he's forced to partner with and protect an 8 year old witness to a murder named Devon Butler (Norman D. Golden II). Butler though has long wanted to play cop and embraces his chance much to McKenna's reluctance.

Actually I wasn't expecting very much from this and yeah in a lot of ways, it's pretty bad. One has to completely suspend one's disbelief on more than one occasion yet you know there are some fun bits in this one mostly centering around the daring chases and stunts with vehicles which actually prove much more exciting and thrilling than one expects from a movie like this. Also there are some moments here that made me laugh on occasion. Now that said, there's still some major problems here. Worst of all is the ultra creepy peeing scene. Golden's performance too is problematic. He pulls off cute kid well enough but he just can't pull off the jokes and serious character interplay as well as one would like. Yet I still found myself liking the kid. Reynolds overdoes the gruff stuff here a bit and well was obviously at a downturn in his career by this point which doesn't help matters. It also doesn't help he looks fat and sweaty for most of the film. All in all despite its problems and despite it being completely unbelievable on some levels and totally predictable in other ways, I enjoyed this one slightly more than I expected I would. **3/4 out of ***** stars.

Moonraker (1979): 007 James Bond (Roger Moore) is sent to California to investigate the mysterious hijacking of a space shuttle stolen from the top of a 747 in mid-flight. His investigation eventually leads him to meet up with CIA agent Dr. Holly Goodhead (Lois Chiles) and on a trail that sends him to Venice then to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil and eventually into outer space itself!

While this one has some problems, it was always one of my favourites during childhood. I always loved the idea of James Bond in space and while it works on some levels, it just doesn't on many others. The biggest problem here is the element of believability as things are stretched even further than the usual epic Bond escapist adventure. Also this film feels a bit overlong and it takes too long between its more exciting action filled sequences. The space laser battle also resembles a little too much a ground battle but does have some fun twists to it but nevertheless is still a bit too hard to follow. The lead villain here played by Michael Lonsdale comes across as a little too low key and IMO the returning Jaws (Richard Kiel) pretty much steals this film whenever he appears but things do descend into outright silliness by the end. There are some exciting and fun sequences here most of which feature Jaws and him in the clown suit was just downright creepy. Actually the movie's most thrilling parts I'd argue take place in Venice (where we get a fun boat chase and a showdown in a glass factory) with the stuff in space being too silly, cartoonish and predictable for the most part. Still I have a soft spot for this old childhood fave. *** out of ***** stars.

[Jack]

Alien Invasion Arizona (aka The Salena Incident) (2007) - a group of prison inmates are being transported by bus, but they escape and take their guards and the hot doctor babe hostage. They go to a small town but find it deserted, because aliens have killed everybody. We don't see much of the aliens for the first half of the movie, and they're pretty goofy when we do finally get a look at them. It's mostly about these people arguing and working together to escape the town before the military bombs it. It wasn't as bad as I expected, of course I'm not even sure if I can tell the difference between good and bad any more. There's some really comical GCI spaceships at the beginning and end, so we start and finish with a laugh. 3.5/5.

Blood Monkey (2007) - a group of college students travel deep into the jungles of Thailand, thinking they're doing an internship for a professor, but actually he just wants to use them as bait to lure in his newly discovered species of giant ape. Then he can claim all his fame and glory. This started out kind of ordinary, with cliched characters and all, but over the course of the movie the cliches turned into normal, likable people that I could  care about. The professor (F. Murray Abraham) and his assistant were marvelously evil. The CGI monkeys were pretty dodgy, so it was good they showed very little of them. Lots of beautiful jungle scenery added some atmosphere, and the apes themselves were kind of interesting as they were highly intelligent and didn't just act in the usual mindless killing machine fashion. 3.5/5.