Recent Viewings, Part 2

[lester1/2jr]

Hotline (Made for TV 1982) - I saw the words "Lynda Carter" and decided to watch this. It's just post Wonder Woman so she still looks the same.

A guy at the bar where Carter works thinks she'd be good as someone at his suicide/ depression/ help me generally type hotline he runs, so she gives it a shot. Immediately, a whispering psycho starts calling her describing past crimes and ones he's going to do. Who is it? Is it the jealous former stunt man she had a fling with? Is it her boss at the dang hotline?

Lately I've been pausing movies too much and am losing something I think. I need more bad movie discipline, but believe me when I say this: Hotline is okay and even good in places. The print on youtube really is not, however. Maybe there's a better version out there?

4/5 acceptable

[Rev. Powell]

GODARD CINEMA (2022): French TV documentary exploring the life of the Nouvelle Vague icon. Thankfully, this is not merely a collection of worshipful talking heads, but an informative warts-and-all biodoc; understandably it's weighted towards his popular early films, and the directors final days are covered in a rush, making the pacing feel odd. 3/5.

SPACE IS THE PLACE (1974): Dressed like an Egyptian god, Sun Ra returns (to Oakland) from his interstellar travels, with plans to relocate black people to their own peaceful planet. Utterly strange and unpredictable, this surreal science fiction blaxploitation musical could only come from avant-garde jazz legend Sun Ra, one of the most magical humans to ever exist. 3.5/5.

[Rev. Powell]

ALL OF US STRANGERS (2023): A lonely screenwriter finds himself attracted to the only other resident of his eerily deserted London high-rise; meanwhile, he reconnects with his parents, who, strangely, appear to be about the same age as him. A queer drama livened up with a smattering of psychological thriller; also, one of the better films about loneliness in recent memory. 4/5.

[Trevor]

My neighbors underpants on the washing line 😳🥴😳😉😉

[Jim H]

Black Friday - On a Black Friday at a toy store, an alien comet causes customers to flip out and morph and attack the employees, who must fight to survive.  Sounds OK, and Bruce Campbell is the store manager.  Michael Jai White is here (and is wasted).  But holy cow, what a stinker.  Just awful.  Not funny, horribly written, and genuinely some of the worst editing I've ever seen, it undercuts almost every scene and every moment that even starts to work.  There's several major parts where it's hard to tell what even happened, or what is going on.  Like the first attack, where it abruptly cuts to a character tied to a chair.  This is abysmal.  Decent practical effects work is about all the positive I can say.

[M.10rda]

Damsel - A princess is basically sold to another kingdom.  Turns out it's to be dragon chow.
Still, I enjoyed it.

I only caught the last 25 minutes (the missus was watching it) so I won't log it or review it. I thought it seemed okay enough and MBB read as a tough Natalie Portman, BUT....... I will nitpick ONE really irritating onscreen flub. ***SPOILER*** She receives a nasty-looking (2nd degree?) burn near the climax... on her upper right chest... fast forward to the next major sequence, and...  the quickly-healing wound has switched sides to her upper left side.

  Netflix, do better!

[FatFreddysCat]

"The Black Hole" (1979)
A spaceship crew discovers a long-lost ghost ship hanging on the outer rim of a black hole. When they board the craft they learn that it's run by a crew of robots and commanded by a madman who wants to go through the vortex and see what's on the other side. Much blasting and zapping ensues as they try to escape.
Disney's entry into the late '70s post-Star Wars sci-fi craze is a bizarre mix of styles -- it feels like they couldn't decide whether they were making an action-packed sci-fi shoot'em up with cute robots for the kids, or a dark, heaven-and-hell space horror movie for grown-ups. It doesn't always work, but the set designs are impressive, the score by James Bond composer John Barry is excellent, and most of the special effects have held up pretty well.
Side note, I saw this during its theatrical run when I was a kid. The bad guy's big red robot "Maximilian" scared the ever lovin' crap out of me, and Anthony Perkins' death scene haunted me for weeks afterward.

[indianasmith]

DAMSEL (2024) - Caught this one with my wife a couple of hours ago.
Overall, it was . . . a feminist DIE HARD with dragons, maybe?  Anyway, I was entertained.
And I will say Ms Brown had grown up into quite a lovely young lady.

[lester1/2jr]

The Last Song (made for TV 1980) - Another Lynda Carter made for tv masterpiece ( aka an okay movie). This one allows Carter to show off her acting range more, namely being upset and scared and soap opera ish, and she ends up looking a lot more attractive for it. That's really how I would sell this movie: she looks good. The plot is a disposable one about some noxious chemical dumped in a landfill. Her husband gets mixed up in it and puts the family (her and her mushroom looking androgynous kid) at risk because of the evil corporate people.

She also performs a crappy ballad called The Last Song https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QeDS2I6NSvI . Carter was a Miss Universe or something in the 70's and is game for all these sort of things, but Wonder Woman was really a perfect vehicle for her and it's no surprise she's remembered for that.

"In your satin tights, fighting for your rights"

4.20 / 5

Bigger budget and less goofy romance angle than Hotline, but still no great shakes. Watched on youtube with an ad every 7 minutes I should get combat pay for this

[indianasmith]

THE CAVE (2005) - I may or may not have seen this back in the early 2000's when it came out, but if I did I forgot all about it.
A similar plotline to THE DESCENT, but IMO a better movie overall.  Also stars Piper Perabo and a pre-GoT Lena Heady at the height of their loveliness.
Solid sci-fi plot, cool and menacing creatures, and the underwater sequences were gorgeous.
Really enjoyed this one. 4/5

[Rev. Powell]

THE MADS: THE PHANTOM FROM 10,000 LEAGUES: This monster movie is not as bad as the usual public domain losers the Mads can get their hands on, but it is extremely talky. They still made me laugh out loud several times. (Personal note: I am starting to get p**sed when they brad about how much of the movie they cut out. Fans don't want them cutting 20 minutes out of every movie, stop rubbing our noses in it!) The big selling point was the three guests, the complete Rifftrax lineup of Mike, Kevin and Bill, which is a nostalgic treat for fans. 3/5.

[Jim H]

Damsel - A princess is basically sold to another kingdom.  Turns out it's to be dragon chow.
Still, I enjoyed it.

I only caught the last 25 minutes (the missus was watching it) so I won't log it or review it. I thought it seemed okay enough and MBB read as a tough Natalie Portman, BUT....... I will nitpick ONE really irritating onscreen flub. ***SPOILER*** She receives a nasty-looking (2nd degree?) burn near the climax... on her upper right chest... fast forward to the next major sequence, and...  the quickly-healing wound has switched sides to her upper left side.

  Netflix, do better!

I bet they mirrored the image in one scene or the other, an editing cheat of some kind to repurpose some shots originally intended for something else.  Surprised I missed it!

[chainsaw midget]

Spirit Halloween:  The Movie

A group of friends that are growing apart and argue over whether they're too old to trick or treat decide instead to sneak into a Spirit Halloween store, hide until it closes, and then spend the night inside.  Little do they know this store is haunted by an evil Christopher Llyod that likes to posses those big Spirit Halloween animations. 

Nothing in this movie really makes much sense, feeling like they just roughed a first draft of the script and stuck with it, nor is is nearly as scary as it could have been.  It feels a lot like an old made for TV Halloween special.   

One thing that did stand out for me though is the store they use is clearly an old Toys R Us.  So that was kind of nostalgic. 

[M.10rda]

Damsel - A princess is basically sold to another kingdom.  Turns out it's to be dragon chow.
Still, I enjoyed it.

I only caught the last 25 minutes (the missus was watching it) so I won't log it or review it. I thought it seemed okay enough and MBB read as a tough Natalie Portman, BUT....... I will nitpick ONE really irritating onscreen flub. ***SPOILER*** She receives a nasty-looking (2nd degree?) burn near the climax... on her upper right chest... fast forward to the next major sequence, and...  the quickly-healing wound has switched sides to her upper left side.

  Netflix, do better!

I bet they mirrored the image in one scene or the other, an editing cheat of some kind to repurpose some shots originally intended for something else.  Surprised I missed it!

I imagine you're correct in that assumption but if they could "mirror" Millie then why couldn't they catch the error and fix it w/ CGI? Pure laziness, I say! It's in the penultimate scene where she interrupts the wedding, btw.

[M.10rda]

"The Black Hole" (1979)
Disney's entry into the late '70s post-Star Wars sci-fi craze is a bizarre mix of styles -- it feels like they couldn't decide whether they were making an action-packed sci-fi shoot'em up with cute robots for the kids, or a dark, heaven-and-hell space horror movie for grown-ups. It doesn't always work, but the set designs are impressive, the score by James Bond composer John Barry is excellent, and most of the special effects have held up pretty well.
Side note, I saw this during its theatrical run when I was a kid. The bad guy's big red robot "Maximilian" scared the ever lovin' crap out of me, and Anthony Perkins' death scene haunted me for weeks afterward.

FFC, you nailed most of the reasons why I loved THE BLACK HOLE as a kid... I'll only add one reason I liked it then and love it more as an adult: the cast! Besides Perkins, we get Ernest Borgnine AND Robert Forster, PLUS Roddy McDowell and Slim Pickens voicing the robots...... plus (only a soap opera-watching weird kid in the 80s could care about this one) Joseph Bottoms as the youthful male lead....... he went on to play the psychopathic serial rapist/hitman supervillain Kirk Cranston on TV's SANTABARBARA... so he was basically acting royalty to me. Wonder what happened to Joseph Bottoms?

Also, the climactic sequence where they enter the Black Hole is still creepy as f**k. Maximillian Schell is probably still floating in that Black Hole today.......