horror remakes: the okay, the bad, and the terrible

[zombie no.one]

I'm talking about 2000s era remakes of 70s and 80s horrors... so not, like, THE FLY.

I watched the 2008 remake of APRIL FOOLS DAY (1986) the other night and it was fairly wretched. bratty overacting from everyone. I didn't actually know that remake existed until recently, but it prompted me to think about some more


I've said before that MY BLOODY VALENTINE 3D (forget the 3D element) is far and away my favourite remake of a 70s/80s horror... they tightened up the original plot line and made it way cleverer, plus it manages to be entertaining and highly watchable

the only other post-2000 remake I'd say impressed me enough to think 'I want to watch that again' was the HILLS HAVE EYES remake. although I think it was flawed it at least had its own style and reason to exist

elsewhere the pickings are slim... I truly despised the 2006 remake of BLACK XMAS, one of the most obnoxious films I've ever seen. now I think there's another one

was disappointed with the FRIDAY 13TH remake/reboot... felt lazy and gimmicky. not that it was ever going to be a masterpiece.

the EVIL DEAD remake is also a complete load of dreck imo, but it seems to have a fanbase


any others which you guys particularly enjoyed or disliked?

[claws]

From movies I own. Ranked from best to worst.

1. It 2017 (A-) 5.0
2. Dawn of the Dead 2004 (A-) 5.0

3. The Ring 2002 (B+) 4.5
4. The Invisible Man 2020 (B+) 4.5
5. Let Me In 2010 (B+) 4.5

6. Suspiria 2018 (B) 4.0

7. It Chapter Two 2019 (B-) 3.5
8. The Last House on the Left 2009 (B-) 3.5
9. Evil Dead 2013 (B-) 3.5
10. The Crazies 2010 (B-) 3.5
11. The Hills Have Eyes 2006 (B-) 3.5
12. Fright Night 2011 (B-) 3.5
13. The Uninvited 2009 (B-) 3.5
14. 13 Sins 2014 (B-) 3.5

15. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2003 (C+) 3.0
16. Mirrors 2008 (C+) 3.0
17. Willard 2003 (C+) 3.0
18. Halloween 2007 (C+) 3.0
19. Quarantine 2008 (C+) 3.0

20. The Amityville Horror 2005 (C) 2.5
21. The Grudge 2004 (C) 2.5
22. The Invasion 2007 (C) 2.5
23. We Are What We Are 2013 (C) 2.5
24. Carrie 2013 (C) 2.5
25. The Wolfman 2010 (C) 2.5
26. Pet Sematary 2019 (C) 2.5
27. Child's Play 2019 (C) 2.5
28. Thir13en Ghosts 2001 (C) 2.5
29. The Stepfather 2009 (C) 2.5
30. Dark Water 2005 (C) 2.5
31. The Hitcher 2007 (C) 2.5
32. The Town That Dreaded Sundown 2014 (C) 2.5

33. Piranha 3D 2010 (C-) 2.0
34. Friday the 13th 2009 (C-) 2.0
35. House of Wax 2005 (C-) 2.0
36. The Omen 2006 (C-) 2.0
37. Don't Be Afraid of the Dark 2010 (C-) 2.0
38. The Echo 2008 (C-) 2.0
39. My Bloody Valentine 2009 (C-) 2.0
40. The Eye 2008 (C-) 2.0
41. 2001 Maniacs 2005 (C-) 2.0
42. Toolbox Murders 2004 (C-) 2.0

43. A Nightmare on Elm Street 2010 (D+) 1.5
44. Shutter 2008 (D+) 1.5
45. Sorority Row 2009 (D+) 1.5
46. When a Stranger Calls 2006 (D+) 1.5
47. Nature's Grave 2008 (D+) 1.5

48. Knock Knock 2015 (D) 1.0
49. Poltergeist 2015 (D) 1.0
50. The Wizard of Gore 2007 (D) 1.0
51. Pulse 2006 (D) 1.0
52. Black Christmas 2006 (D) 1.0
53. Night of the Demons 2009 (D) 1.0

54. Day of the Dead 2008 (D-) 0.5

55. One Missed Call 2008 (F) 0.0
56. Prom Night 2008 (F) 0.0
57. Sisters 2006 (F) 0.0
58. The Wicker Man 2006 (F) 0.0
59. The Fog 2005 (F) 0.0
60. April Fool's Day 2008 (F) 0.0
61. It's Alive 2009 (F) 0.0

[zombie no.one]

thanks... was almost about to start a list


8. The Last House on the Left 2009 (B-) 3.5

if ever a remke was never going to capture the vibe of the original. didn't hate it but just redundant


45. Nature's Grave 2008 (D+) 1.5 

think this is the remake of LONG WEEKEND (1978). excellent original, lame remake


54. Prom Night 2008 (F) 0.0 

saw the trailer for this the other day. looks like a standard teen drama!

[RCMerchant]

I didn't like the new EVIL DEAD. It left out the black humor.
The new PROM NIGHT sucked. But the old one wasn't so great, either.
I Liked the new INVISIBLE MAN!
As far as the new DRACULA and FRANKENSTEIN films go- bleech!
the HILLS HAVE EYES- I enjoyed that.
I really like the new GODZILLA series! But It'll never have the same charm as the old man in a suit films.

[zombie no.one]

I didn't like the new EVIL DEAD. It left out the black humor.

agree... this is just my perception so maybe I'm wrong, but in the last 20 years or so, it seems like films cannot be subtly or covertly funny. they either have to be big signposted COMEDY haha funny (even if it's a 'horror'), or they have to be 100% deadpan serious.

[Alex]

The remake of The Fog was the worst one I've seen for a long time.

[M.10rda]

I agree w/ a lot of the opinions stated above, but the only one I feel particularly strongly about is DOTD'04. I like that one at least as much as the original.

Claws, excuse my ignorance - what are MIRRORS and THE ECHO remakes of? (...What were the titles of the originals? Were they foreign...?) Thx much.

[zombie no.one]

Claws, excuse my ignorance - what are MIRRORS and THE ECHO remakes of? (...What were the titles of the originals? Were they foreign...?) Thx much.

I'm also not familiar with these, nor:

13. The Uninvited
14. 13 Sins
22. The Invasion
23. We Are What We Are
42. Shutter
46. Knock Knock
49. Pulse
55. Sisters

never heard of these titles

[RCMerchant]

Claws, excuse my ignorance - what are MIRRORS and THE ECHO remakes of? (...What were the titles of the originals? Were they foreign...?) Thx much.

I'm also not familiar with these, nor:

23. We Are What We Are

55. Sisters

never heard of these titles

WE ARE WHAT WE ARE (2013) is a quite good film about a family of ghouls (ie. they eat dead people) and I don't believe that's any kind of remake, and SISTERS (1973) is the famous Brian DePalma movie and I can find NO remake of that. Their is a 2023 film called SISTERS- but it's no horror film.

[claws]

Mirrors (2008) is based on the South Korean horror film Into the Mirror (2003), though director Alexandre Aja applied a few changes, it is still pretty much a remake.

The Echo (2008) is the US remake of the 2004 Filipino film Jigsaw, both by the same director.

The Uninvited (2009) is the US remake of the South Korean horror film A Tale of Two Sisters (2003).

13 Sins (2014) is a remake of the 2006 Thai comedy horror film 13 Beloved.

The Invasion (2007) is a version or remake (whatever you want to call it) of Invasion of the Body Snatchers.

We Are What We Are (2013) is a remake of the 2010 Mexican film of the same name.

Shutter (2008) is a remake of the 2004 Thai film of the same name.

Knock Knock (2015) is Eli Roth's remake of Death Game (1977).

Pulse (2006) is a remake of Kiyoshi Kurosawa's 2001 Japanese horror film Kairo.

Sisters (2006) is a remake of the 1972 Brian De Palma film of the same name.

[Trevor]

The remake of The Fog was the worst one I've seen for a long time.

There was even less fog in this one than in the first film 🥴😉

[zombie no.one]

Mirrors (2008) is based on the South Korean horror film Into the Mirror (2003), though director Alexandre Aja applied a few changes, it is still pretty much a remake.

The Echo (2008) is the US remake of the 2004 Filipino film Jigsaw, both by the same director.

The Uninvited (2009) is the US remake of the South Korean horror film A Tale of Two Sisters (2003).

13 Sins (2014) is a remake of the 2006 Thai comedy horror film 13 Beloved.

The Invasion (2007) is a version or remake (whatever you want to call it) of Invasion of the Body Snatchers.

We Are What We Are (2013) is a remake of the 2010 Mexican film of the same name.

Shutter (2008) is a remake of the 2004 Thai film of the same name.

Knock Knock (2015) is Eli Roth's remake of Death Game (1977).

Pulse (2006) is a remake of Kiyoshi Kurosawa's 2001 Japanese horror film Kairo.

Sisters (2006) is a remake of the 1972 Brian De Palma film of the same name.

Fair enough - was really asking for post 2000 remakes of 70s and 80s originals, however no worries. It’s a bit scary to think films which were originally made after 2000 are now already getting the ‘remake’ treatment. Those are still new!!

Eli Roth remade DEATH GAME? that’s a bit of an obscure movie, I had it on dvd as THE SEDUCERS, the pic quality and sound was terrible. Weird movie

[claws]

Fair enough - was really asking for post 2000 remakes of 70s and 80s originals

Oops. Sorry about that, I guess I got lost in my list and forgot about only remakes of 70s and 80s.

[zombie no.one]

just remembered the pointless 2006 remake of THE OMEN.


40. Toolbox Murders 2004

there's quite a lot of talk about this on the extras of my bluray of FUNHOUSE, think Tobe Hooper was involved with the remake, but  somehow I've never been motivated to see it

[zombie no.one]

15. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2003

thought I'd seen this but turns out I was confusing it with TCM: THE BEGINNING (2006), which came off like some random torture-p0rn thing


18. Halloween 2007 

worth mentioning for sure, but kind of neither a remake nor a reboot imo. strangely unclassifiable


33. Piranha 3D 2010 

too goofy for me... that same 'hey this is a COMEDY OK?' issue I described above


56. The Wicker Man 2006

nowt else to say that hasn't been said before. what were they thinking