build your perfect bad movie

[claws]

Eraserhead 2: Birth of the Demon Witch (1979)

Made for TV sequel to David Lynch's Eraserhead (1977)

Following his son's unexplained death, Julius Spencer (Richard Crenna) is curious about the events that transpired in his son's apartment. Madam Abigail (Ava Gardner), a clairvoyant who Julius consults, informs him that his son had a daughter named Sally (Kristy McNichol) that no one is aware of. Detective Burns (Tom Selleck) investigating the case believes Sally is being controlled by a satanic cult.

Director: Curtis Harrington
Writers: Stephen Karpf, Elinor Karpf
Lead Actor: Richard Crenna (Julius Spencer)
Lead Actress: Kristy McNichol (Sally)
Supporting Actor: Tom Selleck (Detective Burns)
Supporting Actress: Ava Gardner (Madam Abigail)
Cinematography: Roseanne Barr
Music: Charles Bernstein

Trivia:

David Lynch did not approve of this.

Director Curtis Harrington shot the freeze-frame ending in B&W as a homage to the original Eraserhead which was filmed in B&W.

[Trevor]

Eraserhead 2: Birth of the Demon Witch (1979)

Made for TV sequel to David Lynch's Eraserhead (1977)

After the mysterious death of his son, Julius Spencer (Richard Crenna) wants to find out what exactly went on in his son's apartment. Julius contacts a psychic (Ava Gardner) who tells him that his son had a daughter named Sally (Kristy McNichol) nobody knew about. Hot on the case is also Detective Burns (Tom Selleck) who suspects that Sally is under the influence of a satanic cult.

Director: Curtis Harrington
Writers: Stephen Karpf, Elinor Karpf
Lead Actor: Richard Crenna (Julius Spencer)
Lead Actress: Ava Gardner (Madame Abigail)
Supporting Actor: Tom Selleck (Detective Burns)
Supporting Actress: Kristy McNichol (Sally)
Cinematography: Roseanne Barr
Music: Charles Bernstein

Trivia:

David Lynch did not approve of this.

I think I would go see this. 

[Rev. Powell]

Eraserhead 2: Birth of the Demon Witch (1979)

Made for TV sequel to David Lynch's Eraserhead (1977)

After the mysterious death of his son, Julius Spencer (Richard Crenna) wants to find out what exactly went on in his son's apartment. Julius contacts a psychic (Ava Gardner) who tells him that his son had a daughter named Sally (Kristy McNichol) nobody knew about. Hot on the case is also Detective Burns (Tom Selleck) who suspects that Sally is under the influence of a satanic cult.

Director: Curtis Harrington
Writers: Stephen Karpf, Elinor Karpf
Lead Actor: Richard Crenna (Julius Spencer)
Lead Actress: Ava Gardner (Madame Abigail)
Supporting Actor: Tom Selleck (Detective Burns)
Supporting Actress: Kristy McNichol (Sally)
Cinematography: Roseanne Barr
Music: Charles Bernstein

Trivia:

David Lynch did not approve of this.

I think I would go see this. 

Beautiful. Once again I regret not being able to give you karma. (I would change the cinematographer, though!)

[claws]

Thanks, again 

[Trevor]

Eraserhead 2: Birth of the Demon Witch (1979)

Made for TV sequel to David Lynch's Eraserhead (1977)

After the mysterious death of his son, Julius Spencer (Richard Crenna) wants to find out what exactly went on in his son's apartment. Julius contacts a psychic (Ava Gardner) who tells him that his son had a daughter named Sally (Kristy McNichol) nobody knew about. Hot on the case is also Detective Burns (Tom Selleck) who suspects that Sally is under the influence of a satanic cult.

Director: Curtis Harrington
Writers: Stephen Karpf, Elinor Karpf
Lead Actor: Richard Crenna (Julius Spencer)
Lead Actress: Ava Gardner (Madame Abigail)
Supporting Actor: Tom Selleck (Detective Burns)
Supporting Actress: Kristy McNichol (Sally)
Cinematography: Roseanne Barr
Music: Charles Bernstein

Trivia:

David Lynch did not approve of this.

I think I would go see this. 

Beautiful. Once again I regret not being able to give you karma. (I would change the cinematographer, though!)

I just noticed who the DP is 😳😳😳😳😉

[claws]

Found a rewiev of Eraserhead 2 on IMDb

worst date movie ever
immaginger223 March 2007
This was really,really bad! I never heard of it,but my BF said it was a romantic thriller/ romantic drama (he said it's got something for everyone) he shows to all his girls. He was really into us watching it together,so I tried to like it. But it's stupid! Everybody has bad hair, and the music is cheesy. I thought detective burns was hot but weird for dating this psychic woman old enough to be his mother. Were they sleeping together? I wanted to see where that romance plot line was going, but the movie doesn't even stay focused on it. There are these lame night club scenes with Sally dancing, getting on my nerves.If I'd written this, sally would get dance lessons. There was too much about the grandfather and these cult people so after awhile, you give up on this being a good date-movie.

[claws]

A Bridge Too Fart

A Bridge Too Fart (1993)

A religious tollbooth worker (Robert Z'Dar) with trapped gas issues is told by God to build a bridge in order to stimulate his bowel movement. He soon becomes a local sensation and spokesperson for lingering air biscuits, his bridge a sanctuary of hope for people who can't cut the cheese well.

Director: Jim Wynorski
Writers: Jim Wynorski
Lead Actor: Robert Z'Dar (Daniel Ripperton)
Lead Actress: Mary Woronov (Trudy Ripperton)
Supporting Actor: Corey Feldman (Pheart)
Special Appearance: Ruth Gordon (Archive Footage)
Cinematography: Don E. FauntLeRoy
Music: Chuck Cirino
End Credits Song: Silent Killer (Don't Pass the Gas) by MegaSponge
Distributed by: New Concorde
Running time: 70 minutes / Director's Cut: 142 minutes
Rating: PG (For brief flatulence humor) / Director's Cut: PG-13 (For scenes of intense gas passing)
Genre: Family, Christian film, Drama, Comedy
Alternative Titles: Daniel's Orifice of Liberation (Director's Cut) / A Prayer for Moist Odor (France) / Curse of the Devil Bridge (Indonesia)

Trivia:

Based on Jim Wynorski's personal experience suffering from trapped gas for decades.

Filmed in Romania.

Director Jim Wynorski has said Lorenzo's Oil (1992) gave him motivation and courage to tackle A Bridge Too Fart (1993).

The film was featured on a 1997 episode of the TV series Mystery Science Theater 3000.

[claws]

The Sympathetic Cannibal

The Sympathetic Cannibal (1986)

Frank Zagarino plays the cannibalistic prehistoric caveman Ung, who is discovered frozen in ice and brought back to life by Dr. Zablynski (Klaus Kinski) and his arctic exploration team. The caveman is sent by Dr. Zablynski to the Brunner Institute for Manners in Switzerland to be educated and made ready for contemporary living.
While in the facility, he falls in love with Regina (Betsy Russell), the quiet daughter of the caretaker, and must confront the domineering temptress Frau Brunner (Sybil Danning).
Half-eaten bodies begin to pile up as Ung gradually transforms into a lovely Gentleman. Dr. Zablynski believes he must have also rekindled Ung's desire for human flesh.

Director: René Cardona Jr.
Writer: Based on short story "The Sympathetic Cannibal" written by Edward Wood Jr.
Lead Actor: Frank Zagarino (Ung)
Lead Actress: Betsy Russell (Regina)
Supporting Actor: Klaus Kinski (Dr. Zablynski)
Supporting Actress: Sybil Danning (Frau Brunner)
Cinematography: Rodolfo Denevi
Music: Henry Strzelecki
Alternative Titles: Caveman High / Hot Swiss Love / Ung: A Delicate Matter / Don't Eat Your Girlfriend

Review:

"Exploitation director René Cardona Jr. fails at blending comedy, drama and horror, with the film also suffering from a low budget. Frank Zagarino is oozing primitive charm but he is more creepy than sympathetic thanks to his ugly prehistoric prop teeth. Betsy Russell appears to be embarrassed being in this film - which is held together by a raging Klaus Kinski and Sybil Danning's bouncing boobs."

[claws]

Universal Dollman (1992)

Toy action figures in a haunted warehouse are occupied by the ghosts of soldiers murdered in the Vietnam War. In a brutal struggle, Judith Grey and Brick Bardo (Dollman) team up with the Puppetmaster dolls to take on the evil action figures.

Director: Charles Band
Writer: Charles Band
Lead Actor: Tim Thomerson (Brick Bardo)
Lead Actress: Tracy Scoggins (Judith Grey)
Supporting Actor: Jeffrey Combs (Sgt. Thunder) (Voice)
Supporting Actress: Sherilyn Fenn (Duty Officer Monroe) (Voice)
Cinematography: Adolfo Bartoli
Music: Richard Band

[M.10rda]

Claws, if you were my student I would award your creative writing efforts an A+.

ERASERHEAD (and likely its sequel) really are bad date movies. Even I know that. I used to make girls watch POSSESSION after 2-3 dates, though. If they couldn't hack it, I'd ghost.

[claws]

Well, Possession is a tough one to swallow 

I've only ever did one date movie: Fright Night II. The movie was more fun than our date.

[claws]

A Blade for Halloween (1980)

Lauren returns to her hometown following fifteen years in incarceration. Right before their next Halloween gathering, she becomes a member of the neighborhood knitting group. One by one, the women in the group are soon murdered. Sheriff Miller believes that the murderer may be Marcus, Lauren's twin brother, who runs the local wool store and has a history of anger management problems.

Director: Luigi Cozzi.
Writers: Luigi Cozzi, Erich Tomek.
Lead Actor: George Eastman (Marcus)
Lead Actress: Lorraine De Selle (Lauren Rose)
Supporting Actor: Mel Ferrer (Sheriff Miller)
Supporting Actress: Virginia Bryant (Beatrix)
Cinematography: Giuseppe Pinori.
Music: Goblin.
Alternative Titles: Halloween 2 (Italy) / Blood Blade Siblings (South Korea) / A Needle for Lauren, an Axe for Marcus (Canada) / Halloween Massacre (Germany)

Trivia:

Filming locations: Fort Lauderdale, Florida, USA / Rome, Lazio, Italy

During pre-production, Mel Ferrer walked into Luigi Cozzi's office after reading the script, and told him in Italian that the script was a "pezzo di merda" (piece of s**t).

[claws]

Ghost 2: Letter from Sam (1996)

"Norris takes 'Ghost (1990)' to the next level in this heartfelt, action-packed sequel!" (Description on video box)

A strange letter from his deceased brother Sam (William Zabka), who was murdered by his best friend Carl (Jake Busey) six years prior, is delivered to retired kickboxing champion and fitness studio owner Chance Wheat (Chuck Norris). In the letter, Sam begs for assistance in defending his wife Molly (Shannen Doherty), who is being attacked paranormally by Carl's ghost, who also passed away six years earlier.

Martial arts pupil Taryn Brown (Angie Everhart), who happens to be a medium, is contacted by her trainer Chance. He tells her about the letter, she confirms Sam's message after talking to spirits with her Ouija board. Fearing for his ex-sister-in-law, Chance leaves for New York and settles in with Molly. He starts teaching Molly martial arts to give her more self-assurance, but stumbles down stairs and into a coma while attempting to assist Molly during an attack.

Taryn uses her Ouija board to reach hospitalized Chance and teaches him how to exit his vegetative body in spirit form. Soon enough Chance teaches Sam martial skills in the hereafter, with Molly sending good thoughts and vibes, so they can defeat Carl's wicked entity in a ghostly kickboxing match.

Director: Aaron Norris
Writers: Aaron Norris, Chuck Norris
Lead Actor: Chuck Norris (Chance Wheat)
Lead Actress: Shannen Doherty (Molly Wheat)
Supporting Actor: William Zabka (Sam Wheat)
Supporting Actress: Angie Everhart (Taryn Brown) (Oda Mae Brown's Stepsister)
Cinematography: João Fernandes
Fight Choreography: Chuck Norris
Music: George S. Clinton
End credit song: (Everything I Do) I Do It for You (Acoustic Cover Version) by Steven Seagal

[claws]

Planes, Trains & Lost Highways (1987)

All that marketing executive Neal Page (Steve Martin) wants to do is to get home for Thanksgiving, but he is accused under mysterious circumstances of murdering his travel companion Del Griffith (John Candy). On death row, he morphs into saxophonist Fred Madison (Steve Martin), leading a completely different life. When Fred is released, he takes the train home. While in the Lounge car, a Mystery Man (John Candy) with a camera on his shoulder approaches Fred, claiming they've met before and that he is at Fred's house at that very moment, sleeping with his girlfriend Susan (Cher). Fred then brings the Mystery Man home with him, and Susan is overjoyed to meet Mystery Man again, who she calls superstud. Fred inexplicably morphs into Bob Eubanks.

Director: John Hughes
Writer: David Lynch
Lead Actor: Steve Martin (Neal Page / Fred Madison)
Lead Actress: Cher (Renee Page / Susan Wakefield)
Supporting Actor: John Candy (Del Griffith / Mystery Man)
Supporting Actress: Edie McClurg (Warden Clements / Blonde on Staircase)
Cinematography: Peter Deming
Music: Ira Newborn

[M.10rda]

Cheers to that one! 

I feel like Lynch could've gotten around to utilizing John Candy in a highly effective way had Candy lived. Heck, Richard Pryor is in the real LOST HIGHWAY. Matthew Lillard plays a major role in TP: THE RETURN. Why not Candy?