Recent viewings

[Jack]

Alien Tornado (2012) - I only made it through about three-quarters of this; it's SyFy's latest Original. There are these really stupid looking CGI tornadoes (with lights in them) sucking up people and doing property damage and stuff. It really seems to have been written by a high school freshman or something. I could assume it was supposed to be "funny", but then I'd have to lower my opinion of humanity another couple notches, and I'm already too close to the bottom to do that. In one scene some shadowy government types abduct some young girl, and to escape from them she claims to have to go to the bathroom. Of course, they're not falling for that old trick, but then she explains that if she pees on the seats, they'll have to pay for the damage when they return the vehicle to the carpool, so they agree to let her go     And the shadowy government types also confiscate the cell phone of the main character, as she's filmed these "alien tornadoes" with it, so she goes to the sheriff and rants that her civil rights have been violated. 

I switched over to last year's World's Strongest Man competition and watched guys throw barrels over a sign. One guy threw 8 barrels, ranging in weight from 45 to 55 lbs, over a 15 foot sign in less than 20 seconds. Pretty impressive!

[FatFreddysCat]

"The Green Slime" (1968)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g79_ljVC5Wk
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Campy, kitschy, cool Japanese/American co-production in which a team of astronauts successfully destroys an asteroid before it can collide with Earth. Unfortunately they pick up a nasty alien organism in the process, which multiplies rapidly until it overruns their space station. Lotsa action, cheap looking rubbery monsters and overracting ensue.

This cult classic directed by Kinji Fukasaku ("Virus," "Battle Royale") even has a cool rock 'n' roll theme song!!!

[JaseSF]

Dr. No (1962): MI6 Special Agent 007 James Bond (Sean Connery) is sent to Jamaica to investigate the mysterious death/disappearance of a fellow British agent and his secretary. The trail soon leads him to the mysterious Dr. No (Joseph Wiseman), an Asian who owns the island of Crab Key where he has a secret base from which he might well be transmitting a radio beam capable of "toppling" American missiles and rockets.

This is the first James Bond film and it's relatively more low-key than most of the films that followed and probably had a lower budget than most. It's still a very enjoyable, stylistic film that firmly established the Bond character and sets up the primary organization behind him MI6 also introducing M and Miss Moneypenny as well as establishing SPECTRE as his and MI6's main adversary. Ursula Andress is particularly memorable here too as she's stunning as Honey Ryder (and pretty much wears a bikini throughout her appearance in the film), Bond's love interest in the film whom he just happens to bump into on Crab Key. Still like this perhaps, there's a few things here that feel a bit too convenient and I felt the climax ultimately proved a little disappointing and anti-climactic. Still a very enjoyable introduction to one of my favourite movie characters and the Bond franchise. ***1/2 out of ***** stars.

From Russian With Love (1963): SPECTRE undertakes a daring plot to gain revenge for the death of Dr. No and sets into motion events that will cause James Bond (Sean Connery) to be sent to Turkey to aid in the defection of a Soviet consulate clerk named Talia Romanova (Daniela Bianchi) who's promised to help him steal a Lektor, a device MI6 and the CIA have been seeking for years, in the process. SPECTRE plots to steal the device for themselves and sell it back to the Russians and also get rid of Bond in the process.

This sequel was more action-packed than Dr. No and really doesn't disappoint with spy thrills and daring action sequences. SPECTRE here seems much more a threat than in the first film and comes across more as a cunning group of assassins, the most impressive of which in their employ seems to be the cunning and tough Red Grant (Robert Shaw). Bond is memorably aided in Turkey by Ali Kerim Bey (Pedro Armendáriz), a British Intelligence Station Chief in Istanbul and other memorable villians here include Rosa Klebb (Lotte Lenya) as SPECTRE agent "Number 3" (one of the main villains here) and Krilencu (Fred Haggerty), a Bulgarian assassin who works for the Russians and seems determined to kill Ali Kerim Bey and his allies. There's also the mysterious lead SPECTRE agent "Number 1" whom we never actually get to see in person  whose always petting his white cat leaving open room for a potential showdown in future sequels. This was very enjoyable escapist spy fare and is one of my favourite Bond films. **** out of ***** stars.

[claws]

"Moms on the edge" Saturday Night Triple Feature

It's Alive (2008) Blu-ray

Mom (Bijou Phillips) suffers a psychotic break due to giving birth to a mutant baby. Failed remake but still entertaining 3/5

Baby Blues (2008) Blu-ray

Mom (Colleen Porch) suffers a psychotic break due to postpartum depression. Sensitive subject, exploitative execution 3.75/5

Grace (2009) Blu-ray

Mom (Jordan Ladd) suffers a psychotic break due to giving birth to an undead baby. Disturbing Arthouse Horror 4/5

[Rev. Powell]

DOGGIEWOGGIEZ! POOCHIEWOOCHIEZ! (2012): How to explain? How to rate? It's 55 minutes of 1-5 second clips of strange and funny dog footage from movies and videotapes, arranged into a sometimes psychedelic montage that very loosely follows the plot of Alejandro Jodorowosky's surrealist epic THE HOLY MOUNTAIN. It's put together with short-attention span wit and would make good video wallpaper at a stoner party. The disc comes with about an hour of extras, including a series of 2 minute re-edits of some obscure bad movies (like REVENGE OF THE RED BARON ,with Mickey Rooney fighting a possessed remote control toy). Pricey at $20/DVD but it's an interesting curiosity. I's give it 3.5/5 for the total package.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l4QOf1cspMM&feature=related
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[JaseSF]

Herbie Rides Again (1974): Herbie the Love Bug returns in this unlikely sequel in which the now retired racing Volkswagen Beetle helps and trys to protect Grandma Steinmetz (Helen Hayes), the aunt of Tennessee from The Love Bug from the machinations of ever-ambitious Alonzo Hawk (Keenan Wynn) who plans to drive her out of her firehouse home so he can tear it down and build a huge 130-story shopping plaza in San Francisco. Also aiding and protecting Grandma is her displaced neighbor Nicole Harris (Stefanie Powers). Meanwhile new in town is Alonzo Hawk's good-natured but somewhat clueless nephew lawyer Willoughby Whitfield (Ken Berry) whom Alonzo sends after Mrs. Steinmetz. Upon learning the true nature of his Uncle and his plans, Willoughby too decides to try and aid Grandma and Nicole, who becomes his love interest in the film.

This silly sequel requires much suspension of disbelief and is full of unlikely sequences featuring Herbie doing seemingly impossible things. Still there's nothing too offensive here and Keenan Wynn is a bit of an hoot as Alonzo Hawk and he manages to improve and steal almost every scene in which he appears. I recall liking this more as a kid especially the nightmarish sheep transform into Herbies sequence and the VW rally behind Herbie in the end as well as the trick our heroes play upon Hawk via a demolition agent named Loostgarten (Chuck McCann) but these scenes are still effectively done. Alright but it pales next to The Love Bug. *** out of ***** stars.

Herbie Goes To Monte Carlo (1977): Race car driver Jim Douglas (Dean Jones) as well as Herbie the Love Bug decide to make a huge return to racing by entering a Trans-France race to Monte Carlo. Also on hand is mechanic Wheely Applegate (Don Knotts). Complications ensue when Herbie is distracted by a blue Lancia, the racing car of opponent Diane Darcy (Julie Sommars), with whom he seems to fall in love not to mention jewel thieves also deciding to use his gas tank as an hiding place for a multimillion dollar stolen diamond.

While this film acts as a return to racing fun for Herbie, it actually proves a little less exciting than The Love Bug as main racing villain/adversary Bruno Von Stickle (Eric Braeden) is nowhere near as cunning or involved in the plot as was David Tomlinson's Thorndyke and in fact Douglas and Applegate are given more problems from the plotting jewel thieves Quincey (Roy Kinnear) and Max (Bernard Fox) and their mastermind Double X, who's a surprise double agent. Kinnear and Fox add some fun moments to this film but honestly it's a little bit of a slow drag with too many overlong dull racing scenes, the usually funny Knotts just isn't given a whole lot to do, and even more dull and downright silly romantic sequences involving Herbie and the Lancia dominate the film. **1/2 out of ***** stars.

[Jack]

The Terminators (2009) - repeat viewing.  In the future we've got space stations, spaceships, and even cyborgs who all look like Paul Logan.  So of course the cyborgs get re-programmed and go on a killing spree.  On earth, where everything looks exactly like the present day despite this being many years in the future, a small band of survivors fight for their lives...um, no they don't.  They argue and fight and act like complete idiots, having loud arguments with each other as the killer cyborgs are just a few dozen yards away.  They argue and fight about everything.  Every time one got killed I was letting out a cheer.  It had some really stupid parts, like when they're riding in the back of a van and one girl is swinging wildly back and forth, because they're driving over really rough ground you know.  But everyone else in the van is sitting perfectly still, making it look like she's just freaking out, or maybe has to go to the bathroom really bad.  In the end they manage to shut down the cyborgs.  You'd think that these super-advanced machines would be controlled in some huge computer room or something, but no - the main girl is walking through a maintenance corridor and comes across a 6" X 6" metal box on the wall with an on/off switch on the side.  She switches it to "off".  At my first job in a woodworking shop, we had a switch exactly like that to turn the band saw on and off.  I could stomach all the stupidity, but I just cannot abide horribly unlikable characters.  2/5.

Creature of Darkness (2009) - repeat viewing.  A group of friends are out on their four wheelers having a fun weekend in the woods, but then a big ol' alien has to come along and start munching them.  I liked this, the characters were fairly enjoyable (except for the gigantic a-hole who thankfully dies early in the movie), and it was cheesy and goofy as could be.  The monster made me laugh;  in the practical effects version he was too green and looked like something out of a cartoon, and the CGI version moved around like, well, cheap CGI.  It kind of dragged in parts but kept me entertained.  4/5.

[Doggett]

Streets of Fire.

A Walter Hill flick about a soldier that comes home and ends up having to free a club singer who has been kidnapped.

The film has that great The Warriors/Escape From New York vibe with lots of 50's touches thrown in. On the opening credits its claims it's a "Rock and Roll Fable".

Its has a great soundtrack but sadly there's very little momentum. Its style over very little substance. Is they had more than two songs, one in the opening sequence and one in the end, it could've been better. Its not the non stop action/.thrill ride I was hoping. But still worth a watch

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJGo2rvfSuA
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3/5

[Flick James]

My Week with Marilyn (2011):

I have to say I was stunned. It wasn’t the film as a whole, which was done well enough. It wasn’t the supporting cast, who was hit-or-miss. It wasn’t the locations, although that was possibly a close second in terms of what made the movie stunning.

No, what stunned me was Michelle Williams. She was positively transformed into Marilyn. I assumed she did well due to the Oscar nod, but I wasn’t prepared to actually feel like I was watching Marilyn. Kenneth Branaugh was Kenneth Branaugh, not Sir Lawrence Olivier. This was apparent in that we constantly needed to be reminded of it with shots of his cigarette brand every 20 minutes. But Michelle Williams was Marilyn. I’ve never been a Michelle Williams fan, and this film hasn’t made me one, but a serious hats-off for this performance.

[Rev. Powell]

THE ADVENTURES OF BUCKAROO BANZAI ACROSS THE EIGHTH DIMENSION (1983):  Insane Dr. Lizado and his alien allies try to steal the secret of eighth dimensional travel from neurosurgeon/secret agent Buckaroo Banzai and his band of rock and roll scientists. It's pleasantly campy and crazy and features some great throwaway lines; the one problem is that star Peter Weller is far too reserved to play the larger-than-life Buckaroo. Jeff Goldblum is underutilized as a New Jersey cowboy sidekick; if the casting department had switched Weller and Glodblum's roles they could have made a masterpiece. 3.5/5.

[Flick James]

THE ADVENTURES OF BUCKAROO BANZAI ACROSS THE EIGHTH DIMENSION (1983):  Insane Dr. Lizado and his alien allies try to steal the secret of eighth dimensional travel from neurosurgeon/secret agent Buckaroo Banzai and his band of rock and roll scientists. It's pleasantly campy and crazy and features some great throwaway lines; the one problem is that star Peter Weller is far too reserved to play the larger-than-life Buckaroo. Jeff Goldblum is underutilized as a New Jersey cowboy sidekick; if the casting department had switched Weller and Glodblum's roles they could have made a masterpiece. 3.5/5.

I agree about Peter Weller, he is a little too deadpan for the role, but I have a nostalgic soft spot for this movie. I loved it when it came out. I had just started working at a 6-screen multiplex at the time (one of the best high school jobs in the world), and I would recommend the movie to patrons who would ask what I liked. I was being honest that I loved it, but I would occasionally get angry patrons telling me they couldn’t believe I actually recommended that piece of crap. But, to be fair, they were asking me what I liked, not what I thought they would like.

[Frank81]

My Week with Marilyn (2011):

I have to say I was stunned. It wasn’t the film as a whole, which was done well enough. It wasn’t the supporting cast, who was hit-or-miss. It wasn’t the locations, although that was possibly a close second in terms of what made the movie stunning.

No, what stunned me was Michelle Williams. She was positively transformed into Marilyn. I assumed she did well due to the Oscar nod, but I wasn’t prepared to actually feel like I was watching Marilyn. Kenneth Branaugh was Kenneth Branaugh, not Sir Lawrence Olivier. This was apparent in that we constantly needed to be reminded of it with shots of his cigarette brand every 20 minutes. But Michelle Williams was Marilyn. I’ve never been a Michelle Williams fan, and this film hasn’t made me one, but a serious hats-off for this performance.

Michelle  Williams  is great. A natural  beauty and has so much range, loved  her in a small budget  movie, Wendy and  Lucy.

[Jack]

Witch Academy (1995) - four nasty girls (including Michelle Bauer) invite a naive nerd to join their sorority, but they actually just want to do humiliating things to her for their own amusement. But then Robert Vaughn shows up as The Devil and turns nerd girl into a hot babe, and uses her to kill the other girls so that he can get his demonic powers back. This was one of those Fred Olen Ray things that exists only to show off some skin. Which is a perfectly legitimate reason to exist if you ask me  It's a "comedy" but only made me chuckle once. But it was kind of charming and quite silly, so I'll give it a 3/5. I guess Fred did a commentary track for this;  maybe I'll check that out some time. Probably more amusing than the movie.

[lester1/2jr]

Dogget- I was really disapointed with Streets of Fire and I like 80's stuff.

Smashing Machine (2002) - classic documentary about the early days of MMA. Mark Kerr has to overcome his addiction to painkillers as well as his not always helpful live in girlfriend. His friend Mark "The Hammer" Coleman is there along for the ride and is a champion fighter in his own right. When the UFC runs into legal troubles in the US, they and other fighters split for Japan and the PRIDE organization.  There were less rules over there and you see thigns you wouldn't see now, like vicious knees to the head of a downed opponent. Bas Rutten is his coach. This has the stamp of the early reality show era, everything is really raw and depressing. pretty awesome and made by non MMA people (I think). 5/5

[Jack]

Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within (2001) - repeat viewing. In the future, an asteroid crashes to earth, carrying with it a bunch of aliens that are deadly to humans if they even touch you. It's not long before most of the population is wiped out, with the survivors living in shielded cities. The head military guy has an awesome space cannon he'd really like to blast the aliens with, but the government wants to give some scientists time to work on a solution involving spirits which they're gathering. They've got 5 at the beginning of the movie, and once they get all 8, something...will happen. Apparently. But the military dude is all impatient and opens a small part of the city's shield in order to let in a few aliens and create what will hopefully be a minor catastrophe, causing the gov't to get off their duffs and let him use his uber-space cannon. Well, that turns out really bad and aliens overrun the city - but it sure is cool to watch    So the last hope lies with the scientists and their quest to find the remaining spirits.

This is completely done in CGI and it's really quite awesome to look at. The spaceship designs in particular were very cool. The voice acting was good, with Donald Sutherland stealing the show as one of the scientists. The big problem though is the story - it very video gamey. "Collect these items and when your quest is completed, we may move on to the climax." That may work in games, but in a movie you really need to explain this stuff, create a mythology, give us some basis of understanding. Otherwise you've got nothing but a bare-bones MacGuffin, and that's exactly what it is. But oh well, still a fun watch.  4/5.