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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Movies  |  Good Movies  |  Things I learned from the movies..... « previous next »
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Author Topic: Things I learned from the movies.....  (Read 46369 times)
Dennis
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I'm sorry, did I break your concentration?


« Reply #45 on: March 25, 2007, 05:17:34 PM »

Living in a town with any of the following names, Amity, Amityville, Perfection or Prosperity is a sign that something unpleasant will occur.
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Reach for the heavens in hope for the future for all that we can be, not what we are. Henry John Deutschendorf Jr.
Kooshmeister
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Must have caffeine...


« Reply #46 on: April 02, 2007, 09:10:03 AM »

Laboratories will always contain at least one intricately set up chemistry set consisting of test tubes, beakers, flasks, and retorts... even if the laboratory is for a field of science that doesn't involve chemistry, ever.

Whenever the mad scientist drinks his own concoction and begins to transform/mutate, he will invariably end up smashing loads of said beakers, flask, and other junk. In fact, these intricate chemical apparatus setups exist solely for this purpose.

« Last Edit: April 02, 2007, 09:12:29 AM by Kooshmeister » Logged
WingedSerpent
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I AM THE BAD PHOTOSHOP EFFECT!


« Reply #47 on: April 06, 2007, 11:45:58 AM »

A person "from the streets" is a much better fighter than a trained millitary/police officer or practicing martial artist.

Looking at a loved-one gives a 100 lb guy the strenght to beat a 300 lb bar room brawler.

Most alien intellegent species are roughly the size and shape of a person.  Or they are gass clouds.

A metal pan can deflect a bullet which will continue to richoet until it hits the origianl shooter.  Likewise a hand mirror can deflect a laser pistol.

You can outrun/doge a laser even though it travels at the speed of light.

 
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At least, that's what Gary Busey told me...
Automan2000
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« Reply #48 on: April 06, 2007, 02:41:30 PM »

We can't forget about the Stormtrooper Effect...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stormtrooper_effect

There is also the similiar Inverse Ninja Law.
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Zapranoth
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« Reply #49 on: April 13, 2007, 02:24:26 AM »

The Inverse Ninja law is excellent.

Things I've learned from movies:

1.   Japanese crowds scream like schoolgirls when pursued by tromping giant monsters.   American crowds, however, almost don't scream at all.
2.   White tanktops are always bloodied, dirtied,and ultimately torn off.
3.   Bullet wounds to the shoulder don't hurt.  They don't even keep the average human being from using that arm, actually.
4.   You can jump any car by running into anything.  Whether it's a barrel, a stack of tires, or a pile of sand.
5.   You can never, ever break the chassis of a car by jumping it.
6.   Fatigue is a state of mind.
7.   Not only do bullets ricochet off of anything, but they make a zinging metallic noise when doing so, even if the ricochet is off of, say, wood.
8.   When confronted with strange noises in the night, women tend to undress as completely as possible, THEN go investigate, preferably with the least effective weapon available.
9   More teenagers are murdered during the act of sex than in alcohol-related MVAs.

and

10.   The inverse machine gun law:  the more opponents one is facing, the less likely one is to actually hit ANY opponent if using a machine gun.

Oh... and

11.    It's possible to carry a minigun, and  along with that sufficient ammo to fire it in a sustained fashion.  Not only that -- it's possible to fire said minigun from the hip, in a sustained fashion, and to aim it, if you just spread your feet apart a bit to brace yourself.   (Thank you Jesse Ventura!)
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Allhallowsday
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Either he's dead or my watch has stopped!


« Reply #50 on: April 13, 2007, 03:59:33 PM »

Interestingly, the improved milling of grain, allowing for the complete removal of the hull and germ from the grain coincides with the advanced development of heart disease.
The improved milling of grain also helped teeth last longer, as consumers were no longer breaking them on the grit, sand, and stone bits that were always in grain products until very recently in human history . . . 

And I learned from the movies that:
Women in a cat fight will always windup with their hair messed up just perfectly.
Mummies have magical powers. 
The hero or heroine who is at the mercy of the villain and in a vulnerable, impossible-to-escape position will.
The Frankenstein monster really only wants a friend. 
The homely girl will get all dolled up just to be slaughtered. 
The phone will ring at the most inopportune times, including at just the right moment to prevent reconciliation, revealing of the secret, or to make the audience jump. 

« Last Edit: April 13, 2007, 04:01:10 PM by Allhallowsday » Logged

If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!
rebel_1812
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« Reply #51 on: April 13, 2007, 06:04:56 PM »

i learned that pretty people are the norm; ugly people are quite rare.
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LilCerberus
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Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?


« Reply #52 on: April 14, 2007, 12:40:21 AM »

Flare pistols: the poor man's bazooka
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"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
The world runs off money, even for those with a warped sense of what the world is.
LilCerberus
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Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?


« Reply #53 on: April 14, 2007, 04:57:18 PM »

Jet engines are generally easy to find, inexpensive, and easily installed in automobiles.

When in use, a jet engine will not affect a car's handling in tight corners.

Best of all, jet engines run fine on Regular, and are both street legal, as well as approved by NASCAR.
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"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
The world runs off money, even for those with a warped sense of what the world is.
ER
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The sleep of reasoner breeds monsters. (sic)


« Reply #54 on: April 10, 2021, 05:53:39 AM »

The Princess Bride: There is a metabolic condition known as "mostly dead."

Mulan: A single grain of rice can tip the scale.

Borat: Americans will let a foreigner walk all over them.

Every rom-com: Somehow the same sheet that will reach only to a man's midsection will miraculously reach the top of a woman's chest.

Top Gun: Soviet migs somehow patrolled the airspace off the California shore.

Every horror movie: White males lack a danger sensing gene omnipresent in women and black people.

All toga flicks: Romans had English accents.

Apocalypto: Mayans were apparently unfamiliar with the concept of treading water.

Plan 9 From Outer Space: Modern jetliners use shower curtains to enclose the cockpit area.

Plan 9 From Outer Space: Commercial airline pilots sit in lawn chairs.

Raiders of the Lost Ark: Indiana Jones was apparently capable of holding his breath underwater for days while clinging to the side of a submerging u-boat.

Red Dawn: The Pentagon will not notice an extra 5,000 commercial flights from Central America into the US.

All Disney movies: Living amid talking racoons and waltzing tables never seems to freak out the film's main character.

Forbidden Planet: It is possible to get drunk off your ass if you play a drinking game based on every time Professir Morbius says "uh."

Spice Girls: How long 88-minutes can be.
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What does not kill me makes me stranger.
Dr. Whom
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Cthulhu for president! Why choose the lesser evil?


« Reply #55 on: April 13, 2021, 01:13:34 AM »

From The Dragon Lives Again: It is possible to die in the Afterlife.
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"Once you get past a certain threshold, everyone's problems are the same: fortifying your island and hiding the heat signature from your fusion reactor."

Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! ... Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput.
ER
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The sleep of reasoner breeds monsters. (sic)


« Reply #56 on: April 13, 2021, 08:54:59 AM »

To hide from the Galactic Empire, it is not necessary to change your clothing, appearance, or last name, only your first name.

The Passion of the Christ: Jesus once tried to engage his mother in a water splashing war, but Mary was too proper to do such a thing.

It is acceptable to sneak up on an enemy during a gunfight, and still be cool. (Judge Roy Bean, High Noon, The Man Who Shot Liberty Valence.)

BUT always shoot the damn Nazi when you have a chance. (Saving Private Ryan.)

Khan and Chekov remembering one another, despite Chekov not being part of the Enterprise crew during the events depicted in The Space Seed, shows that The Wrath of Khan was actually the first Trek flick to be set in an alternate timeline, and not JJ Abrams versions. (Pretty nifty explanation, eh?)

All mothers in Disney films might as well be wearing red shirts.

Gone with the Wind: The entire movie would have been unnecessary if the white folk had just f**king listened to Mammy from the get-go.

When you name your daughter Daisy, you can get a HAL-9000 to sing her sleep.

Amity, New York is a good place not to live. (Jaws, The Amityville Horror)

The Wizard of Oz is not a kids' show, it's scary as s**t.

If you play with a Ouija board, you should avoid eating pea soup.

Though she was orphaned at birth, tortured by her father, kissed by her brother, enslaved by a slug, groped by her future husband, betrayed by her son, and she witnessed the destruction of her adopted home world, Princess Leia showed us  that it is possible to make it through life without turning to drugs or developing an eating disorder.  (I said Princess Leia....)

No, Manhattan does not prove Woody Allen was into little girls...only older forms of jailbait.



« Last Edit: April 13, 2021, 09:01:02 AM by ER » Logged

What does not kill me makes me stranger.
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