Coffy
Rated: R
5 slimes
Copyright Company and Date: 1973 American International Pictures
Submitted by FaustoTHE CHARACTERSCoffy - Pam Grier! Nurse by day, she spends her nights taking vengeance against those she considers responsible for her sister's drug addiction
Carter Brown - Coffy's ex boyfriend and the last honest cop in the city, takes a severe beating
Howard Brunswick - Crooked politician and Coffy's sugar daddy, suffers a rather debilitating injury involving his stomach and a shotgun
Priscilla - Smack addict and prostitute; provides some much needed info about King George
King George - Drug pushing pimp with a fashion sense that would put huggy bear to shame; ends up the victim of a 'wild ride'
Meg - King George's current "Old Lady", has an "accident" and gets a severe ass-beating as a result
Omar - Sid Haig! Petroni's bald and goateed bodyguard, was never properly warned against being seduced by a captive
Antonio Petroni - Italian mob boss with a taste for exotic women; presumably shot to death
LESSONS LEARNEDStuffed animals are convenient for concealing deadly weapons
Never pour wine into someone's lap unless you intend to lick it up
If you've taken the trouble to break into someone's house, you might as well molest the occupants
11 year olds should not be using heroin
Never touch the Afro of a black woman scorned
Wearing glasses with mismatched frames is not the best way to go unnoticed
Throwing a rock at the windshield can cause a car to flip over
STUFF TO WATCH FOR6 min - Okay, so maybe the sex wasn't that great after all
8 min - How the hell did she end up on the set of MASH?
11 min - You think this is bad, you should see the Kindergarden ward
15 min - Kind of hard to pay attention to the foreground when you see what's going on in back
25 min - Someone should dust her rack for fingerprints
33 min - That's the most phony Jamaican accent I've ever heard
40 min - She spilled those drinks and didn't bother to lick them up? What's wrong with her?
44 min - If you listen closely, you can almost hear the growling and hissing
59 min - That has to hurt
61 min - Who wears short shorts? Omar wears short shorts!
72 min - Okay, now think back to what Coffy was doing at the party...
NOTABLE QUOTESDrug dealer 1: "We'll go back to your place...you can have the leftovers."
Drug dealer 2: "Nah, man, I just wanna get high and watch."
Drug dealer 2: "I cant take that, it'll kill me!"
Coffy: "Maybe it will, and maybe it wont, but if it do, you're gonna fly through them pearly gates with the biggest f@#$ing smile Saint Peter ever seen!"
Prostitute 1: "I think this one's for you."
Prostitute 2: "Oh no, not the fat man again."
Coffy: "Are you sure you're not just a little black?"
Coffy: "You wanna spit on me and make me crawl? I'm gonna p**s on your grave tomorrow."
THE PLOTTwo drug dealers escort a beautiful young woman back to one's apartment, with the promise of sex in exchange for some smack. The crony prepares the heroin while the boss "gets funky" with the woman on the bed. Unfortunately, when the boss gets up, presumably for a post coitus bathroom break, the woman pulls a gun out of her purse and blows a hole through his head. She then aims at the crony, demanding he take a shot of her own concoction, which he is reluctant to do, as it could kill him...which is exactly what she had in mind.
Later that night, the woman, named Flower Child Coffin, or "Coffy" for short, returns to her job as a mild mannered nurse at an inner city hospital. The next day, she and her ex turned best friend, a cop named Carter Brown, visit Coffy's 11 year old sister at what is basically a pediatric detox clinic. We discover that the reason for Coffy's wanting to kill drug pushers is out of revenge for her sister's addiction. Later on we meet Howard Brunswick, Coffy's older and very wealthy new lover, who's running for congress, thus leaving increasingly less time for their relationship.
Things take a downward spiral. After the visit to the clinic, Carter decides to do the right thing and back out of an illegal deal between the police and the mafia. Bad move. Two thugs break into Coffy's apartment and beat Carter within an inch of his life, as punishment for not cooperating. One of the two even cops a feel of Coffy's dirty pillows on the way out. Forced to witness yet another promising life go down the drain, Coffy decides to take things into her own hands and end the corruption once and for all.
After digging up some valuable knowledge on one of the men involved in Carter's deal, a pimp named King George, Coffy disguises herself as a Jamaican prostitute named Mystique and offers George her services. The other ladies in George's employ are less than pleased with Mystique cutting in on their action, least of all the King's main squeeze, Meg. At a party attended by other members of the criminal underworld (including mafia kingpin Antonio Petroni), Meg shows her displeasure by knocking a tray of drinks into Coffy's lap. Coffy laughs it off and goes to fix her dress, secretly giving her the opprotunity she needs to sneak into George's room and swap his stash of heroin for ordinary sugar.
Sadly for Meg, Coffy neither forgives or forgets, and a bowl of salad poured over Meg's head kickstarts one of the craziest catfights ever caught on film. Food, hair, and bare breasts fly everywhere, as our heroine takes on every angry hooker that comes her way. Petroni is so impressed by the girl on girl melee that he demands Mystique's company that very night. Coffy prepares to take out the trash once again, as Antonio is her main target. However, this time she's caught in the act. Petroni and his assistant Omar conclude that she must have been attempting to carry out the orders of someone higher up; Coffy wastes no time in blaming the incident on King George, who as a result is curtly made an example of in the most inhumane way possible. Despite this, one of Petroni's goons recognizes Coffy as Brunswick's girlfriend, and soon it is feared that the blacks may be conspiring to take over the crime business. Brunswick is confronted, but uses his silver tongue to convince them of his sincerity, even suggesting that Coffy be put out of her misery...but Coffy is not so easily silenced.
Being the hopeless honky that I am, I had assumed that most of the 70's lingo and black culture would go way over my head, and I would be bored to tears. Thankfully, that is not the case. Filled with sex, nudity, drug use, gratuitous violence and a suprising amount of gore, this flick is one of the ultimate in grindhouse films. A must see.