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Jack
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« Reply #7320 on: March 18, 2014, 06:20:50 AM »

Zombie Ass: Toilet of the Dead (2011) - Japanese movie. I thought the title was a joke but nope, it's actually a pretty good description of the plot. Some kids go out into the woods because one girl wants to be a model and in order to be skinny enough she wants to find a tapeworm to eat. Good plan Thumbup That gives her really bad gas (a recurring theme in this movie) so she finds an outhouse and as luck would have it there's a bunch of zombies living in the pit under the outhouse. You don't want to watch this right after eating a meal, trust me. Anyhow it turns out a mad scientist has created these tapeworm parasites that turned these people into zombies, and he also tricks our characters into eating them, resulting in more bad gas. Our main girl has such a case of flatulence in fact that she's able to use it as a rocket engine to battle the queen parasite in midair. I suppose one could say it's just a tad on the juvenile side. The parasites also like to stick their heads out of people's butts, which leads to some rather "unique" fight scenes.

It was fun, it was stomach-turning, it was...my wife had to revise her "stupidest movie I've ever seen" ranking  TeddyR  3.5/5.
« Last Edit: March 18, 2014, 09:04:01 AM by Jack » Logged

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« Reply #7321 on: March 18, 2014, 08:56:50 AM »

HAIRSPRAY (1988): A plus-sized teen dance sensation campaigns for "Miss Auto Body" and agitates for integration in 1963 Baltimore. This PG-rated effort from John Waters lacks his 1970s transgressive nastiness, but the tacky decor, elaborate hairstyles, and offbeat casting (Sonny Bono, Debbie Harry, blues singer Ruth Brown, Divine in and out of drag) still demonstrate his arch worldview. 3.5/5.
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"Clive [Barker]'s idea of a great time is to have a nightmare about a woman with three heads and no skin who flays your body with a pitchfork. To give you some idea, NIGHTBREED has over 200 pus monsters, including one guy with a crescent moonhead like the McDonald's commercial and a fat guy with snakes that pop out of his stomach and eat your face off, and these are the GOOD GUYS. These are the people we're supposed to LIKE."-Joe Bob on NIGHTBREED
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« Reply #7322 on: March 18, 2014, 10:08:37 AM »

The Wind Rises: Miyazaki newest film is about an airplane designer wanting to build the best plane, during WWII. He falls in love with a lady who he helped saved years ago when earthquakes destroyed some part of Japan. During the time when they weren't together (i.e. pre marriage) he travels the world, learning about other countries' planes and then ultimately found her at a hotel back in Japan, where he incidentally found a design for the Japanese to go fight in WWII. Before they are married, she tells him that she has a disease, so she doesn't have much time left. They get married, he finishes his project, she dies as when the plane is about to go into combat, it's an almost tear jerker at the end. 9/5

The Lego Movie: Probably the most hyped film I watched this year, it is good, but not at the 5/5 mark- a generic Lego man named Emit accidentally finds something called the Piece of Resistance to stop the evil President Business from completing something that will freeze everyone in something called Kra--_Gl--(take a guess at what it is) He is mistaken by the one called Wild Style for being the Chosen One, the one greatest Master Builder. During their misadventures, they meet up with the Dumbledore and Gandalf look alike called Vitruvius who claims that Emit is the Master Builder, but he needs to unlock his potential. During this time, they are being pursued by Bad Cop, who wants the PoR so that he can please his boss, President Business. Well they get caught, Emit falls down something called the Abyss of no return, ends up in the real world and sees that the Master Builder is a boy, who is getting yelled at by his dad for being reckless because it doesn't flow. However, the boy convinces the dad that following the instructions is bad and that it leaves no innovation in design. Well the dad apologizes, and they live happily ever after....until the Duplo arrives. 4/5
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tracy
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« Reply #7323 on: March 18, 2014, 11:30:48 AM »

Battle: Los Angeles

Watched it this morning on FX.....dismissed it as just another alien invation film when it came out but I ended up liking it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle:_Los_Angeles
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« Reply #7324 on: March 18, 2014, 02:31:46 PM »

Jack- have you seen Bill Zebub's "the Worst Horror Movie Ever Made"? One guy's head get smashed and it's quite obviously a watermelon.
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indianasmith
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« Reply #7325 on: March 18, 2014, 05:45:15 PM »

Zombie Ass: Toilet of the Dead (2011) - Japanese movie. I thought the title was a joke but nope, it's actually a pretty good description of the plot. Some kids go out into the woods because one girl wants to be a model and in order to be skinny enough she wants to find a tapeworm to eat. Good plan Thumbup That gives her really bad gas (a recurring theme in this movie) so she finds an outhouse and as luck would have it there's a bunch of zombies living in the pit under the outhouse. You don't want to watch this right after eating a meal, trust me. Anyhow it turns out a mad scientist has created these tapeworm parasites that turned these people into zombies, and he also tricks our characters into eating them, resulting in more bad gas. Our main girl has such a case of flatulence in fact that she's able to use it as a rocket engine to battle the queen parasite in midair. I suppose one could say it's just a tad on the juvenile side. The parasites also like to stick their heads out of people's butts, which leads to some rather "unique" fight scenes.

It was fun, it was stomach-turning, it was...my wife had to revise her "stupidest movie I've ever seen" ranking  TeddyR  3.5/5.

Jack - If you liked this one, you need to watch HELLDRIVER.  Its WTF factor was even higher than ZA:TOTD
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Jack
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« Reply #7326 on: March 19, 2014, 06:50:39 AM »

Jack- have you seen Bill Zebub's "the Worst Horror Movie Ever Made"? One guy's head get smashed and it's quite obviously a watermelon.

Haven't seen that but the trailer looks pretty hilarious.  I guess it's on Youtube so one of these days I'll have to check it out.

Zombie Ass: Toilet of the Dead (2011) - Japanese movie. I thought the title was a joke but nope, it's actually a pretty good description of the plot. Some kids go out into the woods because one girl wants to be a model and in order to be skinny enough she wants to find a tapeworm to eat. Good plan Thumbup That gives her really bad gas (a recurring theme in this movie) so she finds an outhouse and as luck would have it there's a bunch of zombies living in the pit under the outhouse. You don't want to watch this right after eating a meal, trust me. Anyhow it turns out a mad scientist has created these tapeworm parasites that turned these people into zombies, and he also tricks our characters into eating them, resulting in more bad gas. Our main girl has such a case of flatulence in fact that she's able to use it as a rocket engine to battle the queen parasite in midair. I suppose one could say it's just a tad on the juvenile side. The parasites also like to stick their heads out of people's butts, which leads to some rather "unique" fight scenes.

It was fun, it was stomach-turning, it was...my wife had to revise her "stupidest movie I've ever seen" ranking  TeddyR  3.5/5.

Jack - If you liked this one, you need to watch HELLDRIVER.  Its WTF factor was even higher than ZA:TOTD

I see that's on Netflix, I'll definitely put it in my queue  TeddyR 

Missing (2009) - Korean movie about a psycho serial killer who kidnaps a girl and keeps her locked up in his basement. This part is basically torture porn, but it doesn't take long before the girl's sister comes looking for her and it turns into more of thriller with her searching for clues and coming tantalizingly close to discovering what's going on several times. The serial killer is the most interesting character, well acted and psycho as can be. The story wasn't really that interesting but the ending was pretty exciting and suspenseful. 3.5/5.

White: The Melody of the Curse (2011) - an all-girl pop group isn't having much luck getting famous, but then they find an old videotape of an unknown band performing a song. Since they don't know who owns the song they decide to steal it and start performing it. Before long it becomes a big hit and the vain, jealous girls in the band all start fighting over who gets to be the lead singer. Unfortunately for them though it's a haunted song and bad things happen to the lead singers, one after another. Will the last remaining girl get to the bottom of the mystery before her solo act suffers the same fate? This was pretty good. A lot of it focuses on what it's like to be in one of these pop groups that compete in the Idol contests and all the backstabbing and spitefulness that goes on behind the scenes. The ghost story thing is pretty intriguing, but the end, even once you figure out what the heck is going on, it's kind of a muddled mess. It had some good horror movie atmosphere and the backdrop of the whole girl band thing was a creative and refreshing change of pace from the usual horror movie stuff. Quite stylishly shot too. 4/5.
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« Reply #7327 on: March 19, 2014, 08:56:53 AM »

THE COLLECTRESS (2008): Trying to shock herself back to life, Gaile, who can't feel emotions, begins videotaping herself engaged in increasingly risky acts. It doesn't really work; Gaile is much more absorbed by her film experiments than we are. We keep waiting for an epiphany that never comes. 2.5/5.
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"Clive [Barker]'s idea of a great time is to have a nightmare about a woman with three heads and no skin who flays your body with a pitchfork. To give you some idea, NIGHTBREED has over 200 pus monsters, including one guy with a crescent moonhead like the McDonald's commercial and a fat guy with snakes that pop out of his stomach and eat your face off, and these are the GOOD GUYS. These are the people we're supposed to LIKE."-Joe Bob on NIGHTBREED
FatFreddysCat
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« Reply #7328 on: March 19, 2014, 01:42:31 PM »

"City of the Living Dead" (1980) in Lucio Fulci's notorious gore fiesta (also known as "The Gates of Hell"), the suicide of a priest opens a doorway for the Undead to rise and start munchin' on the living.
This is fairly typical Italian horror nonsense with plenty of plot holes and WTF moments, but the carnage effects- which include brain drilling, intestinal puking, and maggots falling like rain - are creative and disgusting in equal measure.
« Last Edit: March 19, 2014, 02:43:32 PM by FatFreddysCat » Logged

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« Reply #7329 on: March 19, 2014, 08:49:38 PM »

Jack - Here's the watermelon scene. I wish I knew how to embed from this site

http://splicd.com/ga4NFOHL-Lc/170/185

The Tall Man (2013) - Winter's Bone meets Rosemary's Baby? What can I say, This movie totally won me over.  Jessica Biel is the lead and she's okay, better in terms of her physicality, not just looks, than expressions and so forth. the rest of the cast especially the hillbillies are pretty darn good.

Someone is kidnapping children from a small dirt poor town. Locals attribute it to a figure called "The Tall Man" who some claim to have seen. Jessica Biel is not abuot to let herself fall prey to this so she and he nanny/ sidekick take extra special measure to protect her son. The whole town quickly gets turned inside out and upside down in a way that, that's right I'm saying it and I MEAN it, keeps you guessing.

5/5 I could nitpick about Biels acting or various elements of the Hollywood's take on a small town thing but it was totally fun to watch and certainly more than I would have expected from Jessica Biel of all people. directed by the guy who did Martyrs. It's not quite as powerful as that in terms of the brutality but the message is actually a little more logical and clear and less huh?-y
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FatFreddysCat
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« Reply #7330 on: March 19, 2014, 09:12:36 PM »

"The Reef" (2010) This Aussie sea going suspense flick is basically a Down Under version of "Open Water," as a group of shipwreck survivors' attempt to swim to safety is plagued by regular visits from a pesky Great White shark. Derivative, but enjoyable.
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indianasmith
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« Reply #7331 on: March 19, 2014, 10:28:00 PM »

Just finished watching an Irish horror movie called SPLASH AREA: NIGHT OF THE FREAKS.  It is perhaps the best Irish splatterfest killer clown movie I have ever seen.  Of course, it is the only Irish splatterfest killer clown movie I've ever seen.  That being said, it was moderately amusing in places.  Irish kids terrorized on Halloween night by psycho killer clowns decide to strike back and take out all the clowns with their own weapons.
2.5/5
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claws
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« Reply #7332 on: March 20, 2014, 06:38:47 AM »

Just finished watching an Irish horror movie called SPLASH AREA: NIGHT OF THE FREAKS.  It is perhaps the best Irish splatterfest killer clown movie I have ever seen.  Of course, it is the only Irish splatterfest killer clown movie I've ever seen.  That being said, it was moderately amusing in places.  Irish kids terrorized on Halloween night by psycho killer clowns decide to strike back and take out all the clowns with their own weapons.
2.5/5

for more Irish splatterfest killer clown movies I recommend Stitches (2012). It's quite fun.
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indianasmith
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« Reply #7333 on: March 20, 2014, 06:41:05 AM »

Actually, I did see that one - I just forgot it was Irish.  It was a funny movie.
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« Reply #7334 on: March 20, 2014, 09:00:12 AM »

TALES FROM THE QUADEAD ZONE (1987): A woman reads stories from a horror anthology called "Tales from the Quadead Zone" to her invisible son. Wow. Basically an ambitious home movie, this is just awful. Recommended above Chester Turner's other movie, BLACK DEVIL DOLL FROM HELL, only because you get to see different actors on different sets engaged in awkward pauses rather than the same ones over and over. Another plus is Shirley Jones keeps her clothes on in this one. Not quite a "must see" but definitely a "should see" for bad movie fans. How's 3.5.5 sound?
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"Clive [Barker]'s idea of a great time is to have a nightmare about a woman with three heads and no skin who flays your body with a pitchfork. To give you some idea, NIGHTBREED has over 200 pus monsters, including one guy with a crescent moonhead like the McDonald's commercial and a fat guy with snakes that pop out of his stomach and eat your face off, and these are the GOOD GUYS. These are the people we're supposed to LIKE."-Joe Bob on NIGHTBREED
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