Recent viewings

[FatFreddysCat]

"Sharknado: The 4th Awakens" (2016)

http://youtu.be/YwIsEPNHGsc
	Small | Large

SyFy's favorite campy schlock franchise is back for a 4th go-round and it's goofier than the previous three installments combined. Earth has been peaceful and Sharknado-free for five years thanks to new weather controlling technology, and the heroic Finn (Ian Ziering) has been living the quiet life in Kansas with his young son. However, he gets called back into action when a new set of shark-filled storms - including a fire-nado, a boulder-nado, and a nuclear-nado (!) threatens life as we know it.

At this point the Sharknado crew isn't even trying to make a "serious" film anymore - this is just a series of cartoonish action sequences glued together with cheap CGI, blink-and-you'll-miss-em D-list celebrity cameos (incl. Duane "Dog the Bounty Hunter" Chapman, Carrot Top, Gilbert Gottfried, Stacey Dash, and Vince Neil) and nods to "Star Wars," "The Terminator," and "The Wizard of Oz." In other words... it's a big overstuffed what-the-f**k sandwich. It's hilarious if you're in the right frame of mind for it, but if you're not already a fan of the series, you don't need to bother.

[indianasmith]

I liked  #3 better, but I was still glued to the tube for the whole thing.

[Trevor]

I liked  #3 better, but I was still glued to the tube for the whole thing.

Regarding 'better', I hope you're getting better.

[indianasmith]

Last night Patty and I watched THE FIFTH WAVE, a mediocre alien invasion flick that mainly served as a platform for Chloe Mortitz' annoying brand of cuteness.  Entertaining enough but forgettable.  3.5/5
Then I watched CABIN FEVER (2016). Not sure why a decade old movie needs a remake, but that's what this was: a bloodier, slightly more lewd version of the original film. Enjoyable enough but unnecessary.

[indianasmith]

Watched an interesting Sci-Fi film from the local Redbox called ALIEN STRAIN. 
Very well done, interesting plot, a bit slow-paced but a nice payoff at the end.
A man is still searching for clues a year after his girlfriend Rachel disappeared without a trace in the desert.  The sheriff does not believe his tales of abduction, instead thinking that the boyfriend did it.  Then, one year later, Rachel shows up - but she is different somehow.  Altered. Very well acted, could have moved the plot along a bit quicker, but overall a fun watch.  4/5

[FatFreddysCat]

"The Bronx Executioner" (1989)

http://youtu.be/T_ch6Fg5lt0
	Small | Large

A future lawman is assigned to a new "territory" in the post-apocalypse Bronx, which is in the midst of an ongoing gang war between "androids" and "humanoids."  Lots of people shoot each other and chase each other around on motorcycles. The end.

According to IMDb, a large portion of this godawful Italian schlock epic consists of footage recycled from a previous action flick, which would explain why "Bronx Executioner" is even more random, plotless, and pointless than your average Euro-trash B-movie.

There's a reason why Amazon Prime Streaming offers movies like these for free... because if they charged customers for them, they'd want refunds! :D

[Rev. Powell]

HUNT OF THE WILDERPEOPLE (2016): A chunky foster kid winds up hiding out in the New Zealand bush with a crusty illiterate and a national manhunt is mobilized to find them. Taika Waititi's followup to the excellent vampire parody WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS is nothing fancy, just a hearty comfort comedy with a Kiwi twist. 3.5/5.

TRICKED [STEEKSPEL] (2012): On his 50th birthday, prosperous Remco finds his life unraveling as he is beset by scheming business partners and mistresses. An experiment from Paul (ROBOCOP) Verhoeven, who had the first three minutes of a screenplay written, then sponsored a contest for amateurs to complete it. He didn't like any of the completed scripts in their totality, however, and hired professionals to write the final 50-minute product based on ideas drawn from several of the submissions. The result is a minor, moderately entertaining soapy melodrama featuring some rather obvious twists. 2.5/5.

[indianasmith]

HOTEL HELL (2016)

Very little of this film takes place in the titular hotel (A brief digression:  doesn't it sound like the word "titular" ought to describe the level of female nudity in a film rather than its title?).  The hotel is there - a paranormal investigator and a hired videographer are trying to document the "dark energy" that has "damned" the place - but most of the movie is the investigator telling a series of stories to the cameraman, each one darker and more sinister than the one before.  At least that's the idea, but I found all of them rather boring and lame, like the entire movie.  2/5

[Rev. Powell]

(A brief digression:  doesn't it sound like the word "titular" ought to describe the level of female nudity in a film rather than its title?). 

The word you're thinking of isn't "titular," it's "boobular."

http://youtu.be/_ePusmtf1IQ
	Small | Large

[BoyScoutKevin]

The Shadow of the Tower
episode 13
50:09
The King without a Face

79 The more things change. The more they stay the same.
a. Almost all love ceremony.

80. And here the ceremony cost $7,000,000 in today's $.
Expensive even by today's standards.

81. Cohabitation by 15 or bust.
Those days one of the few times parents wanted their children, both their boys and girls, to start having sex by 15.

82. Infanta Katherine of Aragon
Finally, puts in an appearance.
a. I don't know how near the actress playing her looked like her at that age, but . . .?! not bad looking.
b. Arrogant as hell, though, I bet. Though typical of her day and her age.
c. Problems compounded by her being in a foreign land, where she does not speak the language.
d. And let us not forget her teenage husband Arthur, who was the same age as her.

83. If the series lacks anything, then it is spectacle.

84. If the king complains that the queen carries economy too far, then I hate to hear what the people think of him.

85. Being a parent or a child in that day and age would scare the s@#% out of me.

86. Being a father and husband at the age of 15 in that day and age would scare the f%^& out of me.

87. But . . .?! what would really scare the f%^&ing s@#$ out of me would be trying to rule a nation at 15.

88. "Sweating sickness" or what they think now was some sort of hanta virus.

89 "The heir and the spare," or, why it is good to have more than one son.

90. The more things change. The more they stay the same.
To lose a parent is to lose the past.
To lose a spouse is to lose the present.
But . . .?! To lose a child is to lose the future.

91. Birthing a child was so oft a death sentence for mother and/or child. And the man could be as gutted as the woman o'er the lost of a child and/or the spouse.

92. But . . .?! the need to procreate conquers all.

93. Childbirth infections. They needed to wash their hands more often.

94. You probably had a better chance of survival if the physician was not present.

95. Hindsight being 20/20.
Arthur's widow Katherine marrying his younger brother Henry, while it looked good initially, proved to be in hindsight, one of the biggest mistakes in history.

96. The one who seems stupid and/or simple is oft the smart one.

And then there were 3. There were 6 Tudor monarchs who reigned from 1485 to 1603. This covers King Henry VII, while "The 6 Wives of Henry VIII" covers King Henry VIII and "Elizabeth R." covers Queen Elizabeth I.

I wish they'd do something similar for the 3 in the middle: King Edward VI, Lady Jane Grey, and Queen Mary I. Of course, if we did get something after all these years, we'd probably get something like "The Tudors," which I find is barely watchable.

Interesting enough or maybe not, while the Plantagenets, who came before, and the Stuarts, who came after, produced as many monarchs and/or a longer reign, more film stock has been developed and more pages have been printed about the Tudors. Maybe, even by the standards of their day, they were larger than life.l

Of course, this is just one view of King Henry VI. Maybe I could watch "The Princes in the Tower" to get another view of him.

Till then . . .?!

[lester1/2jr]

You're Next (2011) - It's not as good as The Strangers, from what I can remember of that, but it knows it and at least tries to compensate with some black humor. A rich but seemingly a little dysfunctional family has a wedding of the parents anniversary shindig thing where all the sons bring their girlfriends and I think theres a daughter too. Then...theres a home invasion by horrible killers and they have to do their best to try and run or fight them or hide or whatever they can do. Of course, the cell phones are all jammed somehow.

It didn't come together in a fashion you'd call great, and there were some janky moments like the random 80's music that played when one of them attempted a Mcguyver type anti killer contraption, but it was entertaining in a "we make horror movies but we're not geeks we watch The Office" sort of way. The goth girlfriend was hot, the Australian one wasn't.

4/5

[indianasmith]

Last night I watched a Redbox film called THE PURGATION.
Years ago, a girl led three of her sixth grade classmates into the cellar of an abandoned, burned-down asylum where an insane nun had killed a bunch of patients years earlier.  One never came out; two of the others were emotionally and physically scarred by the experience.  Now, ten years later, she is coming back to document the haunted basement and try and figure out what happened to her so long ago and why she was the only one spared.
This was better than I expected; it had some genuinely creepy moments and the cast did a good job.

[Rev. Powell]

SOMETHING WILD (1986): Straight-laced businessman Charlie (Jeff Daniels) impulsively hops into a car with wild gal Lulu (Melanie Griffith), who takes him on an extended adventure that exhilarates him until it turns dangerous. After a while, Lulu's outrageous behavior ceases to shock, and the pace sags in the middle until Ray Liotta shows up to inject some real danger into this road romance. 3/5.

[lester1/2jr]

Krampus (2015) - underwhelming cash in on the alleged legendary anti santa figure who someone re discovered. It's a soft pg 13 with very few scares or disturbing themes. The first 45 minutes are like a low budget version of Christmas Vacation and the last half is like a watered down insidious or something. It's too bad because I sort of liked the winter storm atmosphere/ setting. They should have gotten whoever did Killer Klowns involved it might have been more fun. will not age well

2/5

[Jim H]

Krampus (2015) - underwhelming cash in on the alleged legendary anti santa figure who someone re discovered. It's a soft pg 13 with very few scares or disturbing themes. The first 45 minutes are like a low budget version of Christmas Vacation and the last half is like a watered down insidious or something. It's too bad because I sort of liked the winter storm atmosphere/ setting. They should have gotten whoever did Killer Klowns involved it might have been more fun. will not age well

Small aside, it's by the guy who did Trick R Treat, the pretty terrific 2007 Halloween horror film, Michael Dougherty.  Considering how much I liked that one, I was actually hoping for more from Krampus.  I did like it, but not nearly as much as Trick R Treat.

Legend of Drunken Master
I just watched this with my 12 year old nephew.  It's terrific every time, funny and mostly well paced (it lags a touch in the middle third I think) with some of the best fight choreography ever put to film.  Everyone who hasn't seen it should.  9/10