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August 28, 2014, 02:11:48 AM
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  Rub it all you want...it's already hard. « previous next »
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Author Topic: Rub it all you want...it's already hard.  (Read 6661 times)
darthchicken
Bad Movie Lover
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"If my rhyme was a drug, I'd sell it by the gram"


« Reply #30 on: April 16, 2008, 08:19:58 PM »

You get in your car, and get in an accident. How original.

*Rubs Lamp* I wish I was God!
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"His coconut gun can fire in spurts. If he shoots ya, it's gonna hurt!" - James Madison
JaseSF
Super Space Age Freaky Geek
B-Movie Kraken
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Karma: 615
Posts: 12555


Soon, your brain will turn to jelly.


« Reply #31 on: April 16, 2008, 09:56:37 PM »

Except for you're the god off a group of cannibals who believe by eating you they can gain immortality.  Buggedout

Rubs lamp. I wish they'd bring back drive-in movies, at least near where I live.
« Last Edit: April 16, 2008, 10:00:34 PM by JaseSF » Logged

"This above all: To thine own self be true!"



R.I.P. Geoffrey William Stirling
raj
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 109
Posts: 2549



« Reply #32 on: April 17, 2008, 03:06:40 PM »

Except for you're the god off a group of cannibals who believe by eating you they can gain immortality.  Buggedout

Rubs lamp. I wish they'd bring back drive-in movies, at least near where I live.

Poof, they do.  Except that when you're in the backseat with your honey, she gets pregnant and now you're "Waiting for the end of time."

rubs lamp:  I wish for one night of wild, passionate love making with Jessica Alba (pre-pregnancy)
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Killer Bees
Newly Appointed Government Employee and
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Karma: 176
Posts: 1289


Never give up on love


« Reply #33 on: April 17, 2008, 08:15:35 PM »

Except for you're the god off a group of cannibals who believe by eating you they can gain immortality.  Buggedout

Rubs lamp. I wish they'd bring back drive-in movies, at least near where I live.

Poof, they do.  Except that when you're in the backseat with your honey, she gets pregnant and now you're "Waiting for the end of time."

rubs lamp:  I wish for one night of wild, passionate love making with Jessica Alba (pre-pregnancy)

Wish granted.

Unfortunately, you realise too late that she's really a whiney needy stalker and no matter what you do, you can't get rid of her.   TeddyR
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Flower, gleam and glow
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Heal what has been hurt
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Bring back what once was mine
What once was mine.......
raj
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
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Karma: 109
Posts: 2549



« Reply #34 on: April 17, 2008, 08:59:01 PM »

Except for you're the god off a group of cannibals who believe by eating you they can gain immortality.  Buggedout

Rubs lamp. I wish they'd bring back drive-in movies, at least near where I live.

Poof, they do.  Except that when you're in the backseat with your honey, she gets pregnant and now you're "Waiting for the end of time."

rubs lamp:  I wish for one night of wild, passionate love making with Jessica Alba (pre-pregnancy)

Wish granted.

Unfortunately, you realise too late that she's really a whiney needy stalker and no matter what you do, you can't get rid of her.   TeddyR


Been there, done that, only she wasn't Jessica Alba.  If I'm going to have a whiny needy stalker, I want her to at least be hot.
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LilCerberus
A Very Bad Person, and
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fake wine, fake accent


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« Reply #35 on: April 17, 2008, 09:28:38 PM »

Uhhh...
I, uhhhmmm...

I want an excuse!

A real one; One that'll actually hold up in court!
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"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
Normal is what people are until you get to know them.
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Derf
Crazy Rabbity Thingy
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Lagomorphs: menace or underutilized resource?


« Reply #36 on: April 18, 2008, 07:24:49 AM »

Uhhh...
I, uhhhmmm...

I want an excuse!

A real one; One that'll actually hold up in court!

*POOF* The genie grants your wish with a time-proven excuse: "If the glove doesn't fit, you must acquit!"

I wish for inexhaustible energy; the next couple of days might kill me otherwise. I'm going to be veeeerrrrrry tired by Sunday if my wish isn't granted (lots of physical work to do).

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"They tap dance not, neither do they fart." --Greensleeves, on the Fig Men of the Imagination, in "Twice Upon a Time."
LilCerberus
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fake wine, fake accent


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« Reply #37 on: April 19, 2008, 08:53:25 PM »

Uhhh...
I, uhhhmmm...

I want an excuse!

A real one; One that'll actually hold up in court!

*POOF* The genie grants your wish with a time-proven excuse: "If the glove doesn't fit, you must acquit!"

I wish for inexhaustible energy; the next couple of days might kill me otherwise. I'm going to be veeeerrrrrry tired by Sunday if my wish isn't granted (lots of physical work to do).



Naw, that's evidence, rendered immaterial by circumstance, thus becoming an alibi suggesting that I didn't do anything, which people accuse me of all the time.

What I need is some sort of motivating situation resulting in forethought on the part of the represented party, prior to said malice, thus lending some form of legally recognized justification to the action, on my part, in question.
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"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
Normal is what people are until you get to know them.
http://www.wrir.org      http://www.youtube.com/LilCerberus      http://www.facebook.com/LilCerberus      http://www.facebook.com/pages/Absolutely-Als-Bag/235489689811513      http://lilcerberus-ob.blogspot.com/   https://plus.google.com/109856182158905164403
Derf
Crazy Rabbity Thingy
Proofreader
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Karma: 386
Posts: 2431


Lagomorphs: menace or underutilized resource?


« Reply #38 on: April 19, 2008, 11:37:31 PM »

What I need is some sort of motivating situation resulting in forethought on the part of the represented party, prior to said malice, thus lending some form of legally recognized justification to the action, on my part, in question.

Umm, "The cat was already on fire. I was just trying to put it out"?
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"They tap dance not, neither do they fart." --Greensleeves, on the Fig Men of the Imagination, in "Twice Upon a Time."
LilCerberus
A Very Bad Person, and
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 204
Posts: 2794


fake wine, fake accent


WWW
« Reply #39 on: April 20, 2008, 12:22:48 AM »

What I need is some sort of motivating situation resulting in forethought on the part of the represented party, prior to said malice, thus lending some form of legally recognized justification to the action, on my part, in question.

Umm, "The cat was already on fire. I was just trying to put it out"?

No, I'm thinking something more along the lines of "Well, I was just driving down the street, and this tree jumped right out in the middle of the road and bit my car."
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"Science Fiction & Nostalgia have become the same thing!" - T Bone Burnett
Normal is what people are until you get to know them.
http://www.wrir.org      http://www.youtube.com/LilCerberus      http://www.facebook.com/LilCerberus      http://www.facebook.com/pages/Absolutely-Als-Bag/235489689811513      http://lilcerberus-ob.blogspot.com/   https://plus.google.com/109856182158905164403
Menard
Guest
« Reply #40 on: April 20, 2008, 06:46:26 AM »

Uhhh...
I, uhhhmmm...

I want an excuse!

A real one; One that'll actually hold up in court!

*POOF* The genie grants your wish with a time-proven excuse: "If the glove doesn't fit, you must acquit!"

I wish for inexhaustible energy; the next couple of days might kill me otherwise. I'm going to be veeeerrrrrry tired by Sunday if my wish isn't granted (lots of physical work to do).



Naw, that's evidence, rendered immaterial by circumstance, thus becoming an alibi suggesting that I didn't do anything, which people accuse me of all the time.

What I need is some sort of motivating situation resulting in forethought on the part of the represented party, prior to said malice, thus lending some form of legally recognized justification to the action, on my part, in question.

The genie, staying with the theme of the thread, gives you an excuse that will 'stand-up' in court, even if nothing else will as he has granted you erectile dysfunction.

"That man was pointing at me in the most vulgar manner."

"That's impossible ma'am."

 TeddyR
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Menard
Guest
« Reply #41 on: April 20, 2008, 06:54:33 AM »

I wish for inexhaustible energy; the next couple of days might kill me otherwise. I'm going to be veeeerrrrrry tired by Sunday if my wish isn't granted (lots of physical work to do).

*poof*

The genie says "Pardon me, I had Mexican on the way here". hot


*poof*

The genie turns you into flubber; the original, not the singing and dancing kind. You now have inexhaustible energy, but find it strange that you are spending your life in a school locker stuck to the bottom of some kid's shoe.
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