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December 18, 2014, 06:15:11 PM
539548 Posts in 40867 Topics by 5156 Members
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Television  |  THE BEST MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 riffs « previous next »
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Author Topic: THE BEST MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 riffs  (Read 59139 times)
Trevor
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« Reply #465 on: August 29, 2014, 06:35:07 AM »

MAN HUNT IN SPACE

[A very ugly creepy nurse suddenly appears]

Tom, Crow, Joel: "AHHHHHHHH!!!!!"
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #466 on: August 30, 2014, 12:15:06 PM »

"Commando Cody" Serial

TOM (commenting on the theme music): It's hypnotic.
CROW: Hip? Not. Ick!

The Slime People

A couple of actor jokes...

BORING PROTAGONIST: Can someone tell me what happened?
CROW: Well, you signed a contract your agent couldn't get you out of...

ANOTHER BORING PROTAGONIST: We're all lucky to be here.
JOEL: Yeah, there are a lot of actors who aren't even working.
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
Trevor
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« Reply #467 on: September 08, 2014, 08:57:28 AM »

MANOS THE HANDS OF FATE:

Joel: "Every frame of this movie looks like someone's last known photo."  BounceGiggle TeddyR
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #468 on: September 13, 2014, 01:44:22 PM »

MOON ZERO TWO

[Discussing a memorial plaque honoring dead astronauts housed in a locker room]
Astronaut 1: They ought to put that outside where people can see it.
Astronaut 2: People wouldn't like it, it would worry them.
CROW: Yeah, but to make it a splash-guard for a urinal?

Lady: There's more than one way to skin a cat.
TOM: Everyone says that, but no one ever tells me the other way.

[Catherine Schell kisses James Olson on the top of his head]
JOEL: She missed his forehead, that's pretty hard to do.
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
Rev. Powell
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« Reply #469 on: September 20, 2014, 02:23:59 PM »

UNTAMED YOUTH

[During a jailhouse musical number]
JOEL: Interestingly enough, this scene was included in the film 'Scared Straight.'

[Man hands dehydrated woman flask t drink from]
CROW: Oh, wait, that's my motorman's helper!

[During another musical number]
JOEL: This is probably the longest minute in film history.
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
Rev. Powell
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« Reply #470 on: September 27, 2014, 11:38:11 AM »

WOMEN FROM THE PREHISTORIC PLANET

Admiral: You can't trust these young planets.
JOEL: They're lazy, and listen to loud music!

[During lizard attack scene]
JOEL: Their technology must be light years ahead of ours, their use of stock footage is amazing!

[Lots of jokes about this character's name...]
Tang: Linda like Tang?
CROW: Well, yeah, but I also like other beverages, like Hi-C.
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
Trevor
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« Reply #471 on: October 14, 2014, 04:45:22 AM »

LOST CONTINENT

Quote
Tom Servo: Brain the size of a walnut.

Crow T. Robot: The dinosaur?

Tom Servo: No, the director.

 BounceGiggle TeddyR TeddyR
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StinkerMadness
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It Stinks!


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« Reply #472 on: October 14, 2014, 12:01:17 PM »

The Touch of Satan:
This is where the fish live

Final Justice:
Joe Don Baker: If you wanna catch a pig like Palermo, you go to a pig-sty where he wallows.
Mike Nelson: Well, you'd know pigs.

But the greatest ever is:
Pod People:
First:
It STINKS. (Part 1)

Then:
MST3K Pod People song Small | Large


Oh and Trumpy stinks as well.
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #473 on: October 18, 2014, 06:37:44 PM »

"Phantom Creeps" Serial

[Heroine is dangling from tree by her parachute straps]

JOEL: Oh, I can see the strings.
TOM: Fresh, delicious tree-ripened girl!

ROCKET ATTACK USA

Hero: Hard to believe that a group of civilized men could sit around and calmly discuss how to murder 5 or 6 million others.
JOEL: That's why we've got to crush them!

TOM (imitating narrator): Special agents are brought in to slow down the film and bring it to a grinding halt.
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
Trevor
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« Reply #474 on: October 23, 2014, 01:47:16 AM »

BEGINNING OF THE END

[Someone is being eaten by a grasshopper: screams and waves his arms about]

Mike: "He's signing ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!"  TeddyR
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #475 on: October 25, 2014, 04:37:08 PM »

WILD REBELS

JOEL: You've beat the stuffing out of three preppies and given away the girl, but before the night is through you'll take enough drugs to kill a horse. But now, IT'S MILLER TIME!

JOEL (as Rod leaves bikers lair): Thanks for the wine and the use of your chick and all!

TOM: Banjo! Quit playing yourself!
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
Trevor
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B-Movie Kraken
*****

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« Reply #476 on: October 29, 2014, 04:07:41 AM »

THE MOLE PEOPLE

[A wind shakes the tent violently]

Guy: "Avalanche!"
Tom: "No thanks, just had one."

 TeddyR
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Trevor
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« Reply #477 on: October 29, 2014, 04:10:19 AM »

THE MOLE PEOPLE

Girl: You will take me with you?
Tom : Um, I'd like to, honey, but I'm a gay, married, impotent priest with a terminal illness and occasional herpes and I'm a hologram on the run from the law.

 Buggedout Buggedout TeddyR TeddyR
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Rev. Powell
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« Reply #478 on: November 15, 2014, 02:59:02 PM »

THE HELLCATS

CROW: She's got really nice skin for a junkie.

CROW: It's the neighbors, they've come to borrow a cup of smack.

TOM: Cut, and print! Let's break for drugs... uh, lunch.
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"The best parts are watching Sly go through the full range of emotions: deadpan, deadpan with raised eyebrow, deadpan with quivering lip. There's also a great sequence where Sly drives his VW Beetle down the interstate for about 20 minutes, staring dramatically through the windshield.."-Joe Bob on A MAN CALLED RAMBO
Trevor
Chief Troublemaker at Badmovies.org
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 902
Posts: 11318



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« Reply #479 on: December 03, 2014, 03:57:07 AM »

MITCHELL

Joel [Mitchell steps over the body]: "Hey, here: watch what happens when I step on his abdomen."  Buggedout Buggedout
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