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October 21, 2014, 12:53:38 AM
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  The truly terrible joke thread « previous next »
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Author Topic: The truly terrible joke thread  (Read 49878 times)
SPazzo
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My kinda toy...


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« Reply #15 on: March 01, 2010, 07:43:50 PM »

Two peanuts walk down a dark alley.  One was assaulted.
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Set out runnin', but I take my time.
A friend of the devil is a friend of mine.
If I get home before daylight, just might get some sleep.  Tonight.
Sleepyskull
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Well,well,well...


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« Reply #16 on: March 01, 2010, 08:07:58 PM »

Wanna hear a dirty joke?

Two white horses fell in the mud. They got dirty.


How many dead babies does it take to shingle a roof?

It depends on how thin you slice them.



How many dead babies does it take to make 10 pounds of rib meat?


It depends on whether you're making it "jerky" style.


« Last Edit: March 01, 2010, 08:12:31 PM by Sleepyskull » Logged

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indianasmith
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« Reply #17 on: March 01, 2010, 10:48:29 PM »

OH NO YOU DIDN'T!!!!


What's grosser than ten dead babies in one garbage can?

One dead baby in ten garbage cans!

How do you unload a truckful of dead babies?

PITCHFORK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BounceGiggle BounceGiggle BounceGiggle
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"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
Ed, Ego and Superego
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« Reply #18 on: March 02, 2010, 12:07:29 AM »

What is brown and sticky?

A stick
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Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?

Si Hoc Legere Scis Nimium Eruditionis Habes
indianasmith
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A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #19 on: March 02, 2010, 12:18:12 AM »

These two guys walk into a bar, right?

Which is really stupid - if the first one walked into it, the second one should have seen it!
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"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
Joe the Destroyer
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« Reply #20 on: March 02, 2010, 01:01:17 AM »

A dyslexic man walks into a bra...

---

Why do babies have soft spots on their heads? 
So the nurses can carry five out on a hand if there's a fire in the hospital.

---

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.

---

What do emo kids use as birth control?
Their personalities.
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Trevor
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« Reply #21 on: March 02, 2010, 01:23:09 AM »

Two peanuts walk down a dark alley.  One was assaulted.

 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle BounceGiggle
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Trevor
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« Reply #22 on: March 02, 2010, 01:24:11 AM »

A dyslexic man walks into a bra...

 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle BounceGiggle
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Trevor
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« Reply #23 on: March 02, 2010, 06:14:09 AM »

A chicken crosses the road and meets up with James Bond.

Chicken: "What's your name?"
JB: "Bond. James Bond. And yours?"
Chicken: "Ken. Chic Ken."

 Buggedout Buggedout
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Mr. DS
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Get this thread cleaned up or YOU'RE FIRED!!!


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« Reply #24 on: March 02, 2010, 08:53:38 AM »

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Hey, why the long face..."

What has four wheels and flies?  A Garbage Truck

And one for Trevor...Whats grosser than gross?  Throwing your underwear at the wall and it sticks to the wall.  Whats grosser than that?  Coming back one hour later and finding the underwear two feet up the wall.   TeddyR
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Mr. DS
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« Reply #25 on: March 02, 2010, 08:55:14 AM »

Two peanuts walk down a dark alley.  One was assaulted.

 BounceGiggle BounceGiggle BounceGiggle
That took me longer than it should have to get.
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DarkSider's Realm
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Trevor
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« Reply #26 on: March 02, 2010, 09:04:11 AM »

And one for Trevor...Whats grosser than gross?  Throwing your underwear at the wall and it sticks to the wall.  Whats grosser than that?  Coming back one hour later and finding the underwear two feet up the wall.   TeddyR

 Buggedout BuggedoutBounceGiggle BounceGiggle BounceGiggle TeddyR
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Trevor
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« Reply #27 on: March 02, 2010, 09:06:25 AM »

Q: What is the definition of high speed?

A: Skid marks by the toilet door.

 TeddyR Wink
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retrorussell
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BROTHA NOOMSIE!!!


« Reply #28 on: March 02, 2010, 09:45:14 AM »

3 sisters die and meet at the pearly gates.  St. Peter greets them and tells them they must each answer a question correctly in order to pass.
The first sister approaches.
"Who was the first woman created?"
"Eve."
A bell sounds.  DING!  She is granted passage.
The second sister approaches.
"Who was the first man created?"
"Adam."
DING!  She is granted passage.
The third sister approaches.
"What were the first words Eve said to Adam?"
"Gee.. that's a hard one..."
DING!
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HBO in space!<br />
zombie #1
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Oookaay...


« Reply #29 on: March 02, 2010, 11:43:35 AM »

A man walks into a cafe and orders a cup of coffee, no cream.  A moment later, the waiter comes back and says, "We're out of cream.  Can it be no milk?"
lol, I like this one.


one for UK residents:

what's worse than a dog eating your slipper?

a killer whale eating your trainer
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"A whale's throat and blow hole are not connected, therefore escape is impossible.  "
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Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  The truly terrible joke thread « previous next »
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