Bad Movie Logo
"A website to the detriment of good film"
Custom Search
HOMEB-MOVIE REVIEWSREADER REVIEWSFORUMINTERVIEWSUPDATESABOUT
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
Did you miss your activation email?
October 23, 2014, 03:07:19 PM
536143 Posts in 40558 Topics by 5098 Members
Latest Member: AqueousStar
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  The truly terrible joke thread « previous next »
Pages: 1 ... 23 24 [25] 26 27 ... 36
Author Topic: The truly terrible joke thread  (Read 50055 times)
Allhallowsday
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1544
Posts: 10845


Either he's dead or my watch has stopped!


« Reply #360 on: May 07, 2012, 09:01:32 PM »

How did MOSES make his tea? 

Hebrews it. 


That joke was bad, but jokes about German sausage are the wurst!
Logged

If you want to view paradise . . . simply look around and view it!
Chainsaw midget
Just Another Guy
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 256
Posts: 1872



« Reply #361 on: May 07, 2012, 09:45:48 PM »

I went to my doctor the other day.  I told him, "Doc, every single morning after I wake up I go to the bathroom, look in the mirror, and then i vomit into the sink.  What's wrong with me?"

He said, "I don't know, but it's definitely not your eye sight." 
Logged

Terms & Conditions:  By reading this signature, you, the reader willfully acknowledge that you owe me a dollar.
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1405
Posts: 8240


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #362 on: May 07, 2012, 10:04:41 PM »

This guy goes to the doctor with food hanging from his nose, his ears, his forehead, and says "Doc, you gotta help me.  I'm hungry all the time!"

Docs sez: "No wonder, you're not eating right!"
Logged

"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
Texdar
Bad Movie Lover
***

Karma: 62
Posts: 305



« Reply #363 on: May 10, 2012, 08:33:01 AM »

Boobs without nipples are pointless.
Logged

I bent my wookie!
El Misfit
The bullsh*t meter is up high ಠ__ಠ
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 737
Posts: 10609


Listen here you little s**t.


« Reply #364 on: May 17, 2012, 05:14:15 PM »

So a hooker offered to do anything for $20.00- guess who got his room cleaned! TongueOut

So when someone at my house if we have a bathroom, I say 'No, we just Sh!t in the yard!'

They say I would miss my family, but I never miss at close range.
« Last Edit: May 17, 2012, 05:33:15 PM by El Misfito » Logged

yeah no.
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1405
Posts: 8240


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #365 on: May 17, 2012, 06:03:08 PM »

Dear algebra,

Please quit asking us to "find your x."  It's obvious she's not coming back.  Time to move on!
Logged

"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
El Misfit
The bullsh*t meter is up high ಠ__ಠ
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 737
Posts: 10609


Listen here you little s**t.


« Reply #366 on: May 17, 2012, 07:21:08 PM »

Dear algebra,

Please quit asking us to "find your x."  It's obvious she's not coming back.  Time to move on!


no, I did find X:
Logged

yeah no.
Chainsaw midget
Just Another Guy
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 256
Posts: 1872



« Reply #367 on: May 18, 2012, 10:00:17 AM »

So a hooker offered to do anything for $20.00
I met one of those too!  Really though, it wasn't worth it.  Next year I'm going to have to go with a reliable accountant to do my taxes for me. 
Logged

Terms & Conditions:  By reading this signature, you, the reader willfully acknowledge that you owe me a dollar.
El Misfit
The bullsh*t meter is up high ಠ__ಠ
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 737
Posts: 10609


Listen here you little s**t.


« Reply #368 on: May 20, 2012, 05:43:22 PM »

Can February March?
No, but April May!

Where do you drown a Hipster?
In the mainstream.

Mexican Jokes and Black Jokes are the same;
Once you heard Juan, you heard Jamal

What do you call a person without a body but with a nose?
Nobody knows!

When I found out that my toaster wasn't waterproof, I was Shocked!

What does a mermaid bring to her math class?
Her algae-bra!

What do you call an alligator in a vest?
an investigator!

What did the buffalo say to his son when he went off to college?
Bison.

A friend showed me a rage comic on the internet, but I already Reddit.

I gave away my dead batteries, free of charge!

I'm so bright, my mum calls me son!!

Change is hard, have you ever tried to bend a coin?!
« Last Edit: May 20, 2012, 06:05:17 PM by El Misfito » Logged

yeah no.
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1405
Posts: 8240


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #369 on: May 23, 2012, 06:39:12 AM »

I'm thinking maybe Rihanna should start dating LaBron James.  Everyone knows he can't beat anybody.
(Of course, he wouldn't have any rings to give her!)
Logged

"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
Psycho Circus
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 1529
Posts: 12052


Shake The Faith


WWW
« Reply #370 on: May 23, 2012, 07:18:01 AM »

I'm thinking maybe Rihanna should start dating LaBron James.  Everyone knows he can't beat anybody.
(Of course, he wouldn't have any rings to give her!)

Oooh tasteful....tsk, tsk.
Logged

El Misfit
The bullsh*t meter is up high ಠ__ಠ
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 737
Posts: 10609


Listen here you little s**t.


« Reply #371 on: May 25, 2012, 07:44:43 PM »

I'm thinking maybe Rihanna should start dating LaBron James.  Everyone knows he can't beat anybody.
(Of course, he wouldn't have any rings to give her!)
that reminds me: Rihanna has an IQ of 117. Can you beat her?
Chris Brown: I already did.


20+ years ago, there was sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll.
now there's only AIDs, crack, and techno.
Logged

yeah no.
Raffine
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 768
Posts: 4318



« Reply #372 on: May 25, 2012, 08:00:41 PM »

20+ years ago, there was sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll.
now there's only AIDs, crack, and techno.

Sadly but truthfully - it's more like 40 years ago...
Logged

If you're an Andy Milligan fan there's no hope for you.
indianasmith
Archeologist, Theologian, Elder Scrolls Addict, and a
Frightening Fanatic of Horrible Cinema
****

Karma: 1405
Posts: 8240


A good bad movie is like popcorn for the soul!


« Reply #373 on: May 25, 2012, 10:30:19 PM »

When Ronald Reagan was President, we had Johnny Cash and Bob Hope.
Now that Obama is President, we have no cash and no hope.
Logged

"Carpe diem!" - Seize the day!  "Carpe per diem!" - Seize the daily living allowance! "Carpe carp!" - Seize the fish!
"Carpe Ngo Diem!" - Seize the South Vietnamese Dictator!
JaseSF
Super Space Age Freaky Geek
B-Movie Kraken
*****

Karma: 638
Posts: 12870


Soon, your brain will turn to jelly.


« Reply #374 on: May 26, 2012, 12:51:49 AM »

I've seen the same thing but here in Canada, they change the names from Ronald Reagan to Pierre Trudeau and Obama to Stephen Harper.
Logged

"This above all: To thine own self be true!"



R.I.P. Geoffrey William Stirling
Pages: 1 ... 23 24 [25] 26 27 ... 36
Badmovies.org Forum  |  Other Topics  |  Off Topic Discussion  |  The truly terrible joke thread « previous next »
    Jump to:  


    RSS Feed Subscribe Subscribe by RSS
    Email Subscribe Subscribe by Email


    Popular Articles
    How To Find A Bad Movie

    The Champions of Justice

    Plan 9 from Outer Space

    Manos, The Hands of Fate

    Podcast: Todd the Convenience Store Clerk

    Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

    Dragonball: The Magic Begins

    Cool As Ice

    The Educational Archives: Driver's Ed

    Godzilla vs. Monster Zero

    Do you have a zombie plan?

    FROM THE BADMOVIES.ORG ARCHIVES
    ImageThe Giant Claw - Slime drop

    Earth is visited by a GIANT ANTIMATTER SPACE BUZZARD! Gawk at the amazingly bad bird puppet, or chuckle over the silly dialog. This is one of the greatest b-movies ever made.

    Lesson Learned:
    • Osmosis: os·mo·sis (oz-mo'sis, os-) n., 1. When a bird eats something.

    Subscribe to Badmovies.org and get updates by email:

    HOME B-Movie Reviews Reader Reviews Forum Interviews TV Shows Advertising Information Sideshows Links Contact

    Badmovies.org is owned and operated by Andrew Borntreger. All original content is © 1998 - 2014 by its respective author(s). Image, video, and audio files are used in accordance with the Fair Use Law, and are property of the film copyright holders. You may freely link to any page (.html or .php) on this website, but reproduction in any other form must be authorized by the copyright holder.