My Life Is Crashing Down Around Me

[InformationGeek]

See title.  My life is really crashing down.  No, everyone is still alive, I'm in a good health, and such.  However, I can't fully believe what happened.  My parents are divorcing.  I don't understand why.  All I know if that in less than a week, my mom and me are moving into a new house and my dad is moving to Tampa for work, my pets are being all split apart as well.  It's the middle of Spring Break and all my friends are gone when I need them to talk.  I'm out of school as well so no teachers or guidance conulsoers to talk to either.  I feel so empty and sick to my stomach.

I need some comforting words.  I feel so sad and so alone with no one outside of my family to talk to, who only make me feel worse by constantly reminding me of the situation by telling me over and over.  I just wish there was something I could do... please... say something nice... 

[Paquita]

Aw! I'm sure everything will be OK.  All of my friends parents are divorced, and they turned out fine and had good relationships with both of their parents even though they were apart.  I'm sure the news is just settling in and it seems really bad right now, but you'll feel better soon.

Anyway! Didn't watching the 11 most awkward Christopher Walken moments make you feel a little better?  I could only get through about 5 minutes of it because there was too much guy with glasses and not enough Walken.  Cheer up!  Ricky Martin is gay!

[Sleepyskull]

I'm really sorry, InformationGeek! 

I'm not sure what to say other than it's okay to feel depressed for a while and don't feel guilty. I would advise you to be honest (but not hysterical)  with your family and friends about how you feel. 
 

On the positive side, if your parents are unhappy enough to divorce maybe this will give them and you a chance to start off fresher and  end up happier.

I would suggest that you use this time to do some deep thinking (about your life, situation, or anything at all) and relax yourself. It does not matter how.  Listen to music, go for walks, watch movies, or whatever works!

I also highly recommend that you find somebody trustworthy to talk to.  Don't be embarrassed to see the school counselor or a teacher. 

One last thought: It might be therapeutic to make your own anime/manga/art about your experience. You could make it private or public. I could see you making an effective manga about divorce to help other kids out.

Best of luck!!!! You are one truly cool person and you should always remember that!

[indianasmith]

Sadly, half of all marriages fail.  It is not your fault, and there is nothing you can do to change it.  It does not change the fact that you are a kind-hearted, interesting, and funny young man with a good mind and a bright future.  You wouoldn't be normal if you weren't a little depressed right now, but things will get better over time.  As the German sausage lover said after his trip to the bathroom, the wurst is passed.


OK, that was a truly terrible pun.  I'm sorry,  But maybe I at least made you crack a smile.  We will all be here for you!

[Mofo Rising]

That's rough, InformationGeek.

I can only reiterate what others have said. Things will get better, but that's probably small comfort for the now.

In the meantime, remember all of us on the board here are rooting for you.

[Vik]

That really sucks man. It will get better eventually, in the meantime I recommend you keep yourself busy, watch bad movies, go to friends, or do stuff you like to do and things you're good at, to distract yourself from the issue ..
 

[The Burgomaster]

This is tough news.  My parents have been married for 47 years (but believe me, they can bicker like champions . . . and quite frequently!)  One of my sisters got divorced and is now remarried.  Her kids were very young when she got divorced, but they still have great relationships with both their parents (and their step parents).  It was rough at first, but over time everything probably worked out for the best.  I wish you well during this difficult situation.

[Silverlady]

I feel for you, Information Geek.  My youngest son was 20 when his Dad and I split up.  Remember, do not in any way blame yourself.  Right now it's just as stressful on your parents, but they are trying to establish a new sense of normalcy.

I know its hard, but GO WITH THE FLOW.

It is ok to feel what you are feeling. Cry if you have to ... its ok

You love your parents and they love you.  Remember that.

Stay in touch with your friends, people you care about and who care about you.

It will get better.  I don't know if you are religious, but if you are, talk to God. He listens.

[SPazzo]

I'm really sorry to hear that InfoGeek.  I've never had to deal with a divorce myself, but I have a lot of friends who have.  All I can really suggest is to go distract yourself, just like Vik said.

What do know is that, things will get better.  Maybe you should try calling one of those Teen Help Lines.  I had a rough spot with some s**t a year or so ago, and calling that line really helped.  Try Googleing around to find one.

Also, have you tried talking to a pastor or priest?  That could also help...

Well, whatever you do, stay happy man.

[Rev. Powell]

Sorry to hear that, InfoGeek. 

Of course I have no idea, but since you're basically an adult now, perhaps your parents stuck together as long as they did for your sake.  If so, that indicates that they both probably care for you very much.  I'm glad for your sake they didn't split up when you were 11 or 12, when it would be harder for you to deal with it and understand the realities of the situation.

I suggest you watch the BIRDEMIC trailer again to cheer up: 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YnNvBucoNSY
	Small | Large

[Psycho Circus]

Sorry, to hear that InfoGeek, but you will be fine. It's not your fault and your life is not crashing down around you. It's just that people have problems, grow apart and things change sometimes. My parents split up when I was 9 years old, as my mother left my dad for some big ugly fat rich guy. There was lots of bitterness and fighting, but everyone came through it and got on with their lives. It's all in the past, where it belongs and I wouldn't go back and change it looking at how my parents are now.

Remember, you've always got a ton of people here to talk to, either openly on the boards or in private. You're not alone my friend.  

[JaseSF]

Yeah that's tough. There's some pretty good advice here, some from people who've been through the same. I think I'd probably escape a bit into things myself  (movies, music, books)- maybe even expand my current interests a bit and try new things.

[El Misfit]

wow, I hope you feel better soon. my friend went through the same thing.

[Andrew]

Sounds like the worst of it is that you do not have anyone you can talk with, and it is very hard to face hardship alone.  We are social animals.  Is there anyone you can call at present?  All it usually takes is a conversation with that one real friend to take some of the weight off of your shoulders.

I am a big believer in Time as a healer.  It brings new things, makes it easier (or sometimes makes it possible in the first place) to put events in perspective, and dulls the pain of the now.  Your friends will come back from spring break, life will settle back down at home, and you will see your father again - but it will be hard for a while.

Keep your chin up.  My best to you.

[Dennis]

It's important to remember that your mom is still your mom and your dad is still your dad, don't take sides, this is not your fault. The same thing happened with my parents after 25 years together, it is confusing and painful at first, but as has been said it gets better with time, hang in there my friend.