ANGST (2003)

OK, I already posted a brief commentary on this movie in the "Recent Viewings" thread, but the more time I have had to process it, the more I felt that this movie really deserved a thread of its own. In fact, Andrew, if your busy schedule ever allows, I would LOVE to read your review of this film. The opportunities for your own brand of scathing humor are manifold!
I will say from the start that this film is much more explicit than I am generally comfortable with. Its original title, PENETRATION ANGST, might have put me off altogether. However, I must say it was not particularly titillating despite some pretty explicit content. It alternated between fascinating, repulsive, and utterly bizarre. It was one of the most bizarre cinematic experiences I have ever sat through, and watching it at 6 AM while my household slumbered and my allergies were busy summoning a World Mucus Convention in my sinuses probably enhanced the weirdness. Wait - no - NOTHING could make this movie more weird than it actually was.

Here's the gist: Helen (Fiona Horsey) is an attractive young lady with intimacy issues, stemming from a traumatic childhood experience that she remembers in flashbacks throughout the movie. Dennis (Paul Conway) is a nerdy, sensitive poetic type who is hopelessly infatuated with her. At the beginning of the movie, he is trying awkwardly to chat her up after work when her obnoxious boyfriend picks her up and drives off with her. It's obvious in the first scene that (A) he only has one thing in mind, and (B) that she is VERY uncomfortable with anyone trying to get between her legs. But then he tricks her into looking out the passenger side window and rolls the window up, trapping her head and exposing her hindquarters to his assault! But then he disappears without a trace, leaving only a terrified, confused Helen and hopelessly jealous Dennis. When she gets home that night, she hears a voice saying "Feed me!"
Unable to deal with this bizarre development, she decides to go see her gynecologist. He gets her in the stirrups, but she is obviously so nervous and terrified he decided to give her a small injection to help her relax. You can guess what happens next. He dismisses the office staff, and poor Helen wakes up in the stirrups with her doctor's clothes (and an empty condom) lying in a pile on the floor in front of the exam chair. She dresses and runs home, crying and confused. There her wheelchair-bound stepfather tries to assault her, so she runs away - into the waiting arms of Dennis! But now the strange voice is crying "Feed Me!" again. She starts to seduce Dennis, but then breaks it off at the last instant, unable to see the death of such a decent little twerp.
So Helen becomes a prostitute, and Dennis roams the streets of London at night looking for her. While her insatiable nether regions are consuming men whole left and right, he hooks up with two beautiful Siamese twins. Sylvia is a shy, bookish little nerd not unlike Dennis, while her sister Sonia is a vulgar slut! Of course, Dennis and Sylvia fall for each other, but when they try to be intimate Sonia is right there with vulgar commentary and sarcasm. When the finally turn off the lights, Sonia manages to trick Dennis into making love to her instead, infuriating her sister and driving Dennis into a murderous rage! He grabs an electric carving knife and tries to separate the two sisters, but when Sonia grabs his arm he accidentally cuts her throat instead!
Vanishing men, a love affair with a British bobby, Dennis hooking up with a stripper to rob a bank, Helen's much-interrupted honeymoon (including a bit where she sneaks out of the bridal suite to "feed" her insatiable need - with the groom's FATHER no less!). An exploding RV. Sex on the beach. Multiple flashbacks of childhood trauma. Gun battles. Stabbings. Duct Tape. This movie has got it all. EVery bad movie lover needs to see this truly twisted and bizarre piece of cinema.